Projection Novel (Completed) - Chapter 115

Finally, it was Cheon Sejoo who broke the silence.

“Are you still holding onto something from two years ago?”

“Holding onto what? I’m just saving. I don’t understand what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t pretend, Sejin.”

“No, really. You said death insurance was meaningless, just a way to save. Because I’m obedient Sejin, I did exactly what you did. Is there a problem?”

At this brazen reply, Cheon Sejoo frowned and smiled. It was a look that seemed to ask, “Do you really think there’s no problem?” Seeing that expression, Sejin suppressed his rising emotions and continued:

“If me buying death insurance is a problem, then so is yours. Don’t think you’re the only exception. If you tell me to cancel, you have to cancel too.”

“Why do you keep trying to assign meaning to it? I said it’s nothing.”

“Right, it’s nothing! Because it’s nothing, I bought insurance. So don’t worry about it!”

“But you’re acting as if it means something.”

Cheon Sejoo rubbed his neck as if stressed, then jutted his chin towards Sejin. Sejin snorted and leaned back into the chair, looking at him as if to expose him.

“You say it means nothing, but it’s not really like that, is it? Because it’s not, you find me annoying. Do you think I don’t know? Don’t treat others like fools, don’t mind it. I’ll save up and buy a house too.”

“….”

At Sejin’s stubbornness, Cheon Sejoo also leaned back into the sofa, his dark eyes fixed on Sejin. He sighed inwardly, facing Sejin’s temper after such a long time.

When he received the message that Sejin had bought death insurance, he was so startled he couldn’t describe it. Just seeing those words, a series of scenarios flashed through his mind, making his heart plummet.

So this is what it feels like… When Sejin found out he had bought death insurance, he must have felt the same way… This sudden realization made his chest ache.

However, while Sejin didn’t answer his call, he had time to calm down and realize there was a difference between himself and Sejin. Cheon Sejoo was someone who had walked a difficult path, so preparing for death was reasonable, but Sejin was not. No one in this world hated or despised Sejin. Therefore, Sejin had no reason to buy death insurance.

Cheon Sejoo was about to explain when Sejin, who had been staring at him, suddenly slumped, his face gloomy. That adorable face stunned Cheon Sejoo.

Immediately after, Sejin stood up, sat next to Cheon Sejoo, then snuggled into his arms, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist. He gently stroked the small head resting on his chest, and Sejin whispered into his shirt collar:

“…Just this once, can’t you give in to me? I really hate it. I hate it so much I don’t even want to mention it. They say words are omens, so every time I think of that insurance, I feel very uncomfortable. I really, really hate it…”

Cheon Sejoo thought Sejin would get angry as usual, but his childlike whining voice softened his heart. As he gently stroked that delicate hair, Sejin continued:

“I told you I hate it. Even if I die, I’ll hate it, Cheon Sejoo, so please give in to me. If you cancel, I’ll cancel too.”

Sejin’s insurance was still within the withdrawal period. Canceling immediately would incur no loss. The same applied to Cheon Sejoo’s insurance. Although the contract period hadn’t ended, canceling midway would only mean not receiving interest, while the principal would still be refunded.

“Please… okay?”

At Sejin’s continuous pleading, Cheon Sejoo felt his hardened heart gradually soften. At the same time, he remembered the feeling he had when he read that message from Sejin.

All his preparations were for Sejin. But if just thinking about them caused Sejin such distress, if he had to carry the same feeling he had experienced when he received that news—that was not what Cheon Sejoo wanted. He didn’t want to hurt Sejin, nor did he have the right to ask him to endure pain.

He lost again. Finally, Cheon Sejoo smiled vaguely and nodded.

“Alright. I’ll cancel.”

“…Really? Really?”

Hearing that, Kwon Sejin looked up and asked again. In his clear brown eyes, vitality shone, and the cat-like shape of his eyes clearly showed joy. Cheon Sejoo reached out and cupped his cheek, gently stroking his reddened eye corner with his fingertip and nodding again. Receiving that confirmation, Kwon Sejin finally smiled faintly and hugged Cheon Sejoo tightly. He kissed the small mole on the back of the other’s neck, whispering:

“I love you. I like you best in this world. You and I will die on the same day, so don’t ever worry about things like that again…”

It wasn’t an insurance package that took effect immediately upon death, yet somehow Kwon Sejin felt so reassured that his voice trembled slightly. Cheon Sejoo smiled weakly and hugged him close. He gently stroked Kwon Sejin’s broad back, comforting his younger lover who always made him helpless.

After that, the first thing Kwon Sejin did after canceling the insurance and receiving his first salary was to buy a gift for Cheon Sejoo. Summer was approaching, and to prepare for his days working at the hotel, Kwon Sejin had a custom summer suit tailored to fit his figure.

Breathable dark beige fabric, a pristine white shirt, a blue-grey tie, all fit Cheon Sejoo’s body perfectly. Although it wasn’t exactly ideal work attire, Kwon Sejin wasn’t knowledgeable about such things. He was simply happy for days just because Cheon Sejoo wore the outfit he bought to work.

But that joy didn’t last long. Night shifts began, Cheon Sejoo’s work became busier, and the days they couldn’t meet continued.

Leading up to Shin Gyo Yeon’s inauguration as DG chairman, Cheon Sejoo almost stayed up all night at the hotel with his team members. Recently, he was so busy he didn’t even have time to drop by home. Meanwhile, Kwon Sejin still worked at the hospital as usual, but because his work schedule changed every two weeks, the number of times they met significantly decreased.

Work wasn’t difficult. Kwon Sejin had now fully adapted to the emergency room, except for occasionally wanting to hit drunk patients with medical records, he hardly felt anything heavy. The only thing that made him suffer was the endless string of days he couldn’t meet Cheon Sejoo.

One or two days were fine. But when night shifts began, and he didn’t see Cheon Sejoo for ten consecutive days, he started to feel confused and depressed.

Although he had only been working for three months, some might say he got discouraged too early, but for Kwon Sejin, the most important thing was not work but Cheon Sejoo. So it wasn’t strange.

Since Cheon Sejoo couldn’t quit his job, if he wanted to meet him more often, Kwon Sejin had to stay home more. But he also had no intention of quitting, so he eventually started considering changing jobs.

“Change jobs?”

“Yeah.”

“…Do whatever you want.”

Cheon Sejoo didn’t object to Kwon Sejin’s decision. The way he said, “If that’s what you want, do what makes you comfortable,” made Kwon Sejin honestly feel a little sad.

In his heart, he had partly hoped Cheon Sejoo would beg him to quit and stay home to take care of him, but he also understood Cheon Sejoo’s feelings in saying that, so even though his lips pouted slightly, Kwon Sejin made his own decision.

So, after working at that International Hospital for four months, Kwon Sejin submitted his resignation and transferred to a large children’s hospital not far from home.

The specialized children’s hospital only had two branches in Seoul, operating until 9 PM, but they managed by completely dividing the nursing staff’s shifts. If he chose the afternoon shift from 1 PM to 9 PM, the salary would be slightly higher, but Kwon Sejin unhesitatingly chose the morning shift from 9 AM to 5 PM.

In children’s hospitals, there were many nurses, but very few with actual nursing degrees. Those rare nurses were often assigned to inpatient departments as head nurses, or worked in the lab and injection room. Among them, Kwon Sejin’s workplace was the blood collection room near the outpatient clinic. Because Kwon Sejin was large and could easily restrain struggling children, they assigned him there.

“Ugh a a a a a!”

For Kwon Sejin, who was already used to troublesome patients in the emergency room, the pediatric ward was truly like heaven. The little kids, barely knee-high, crying, he just found unbearably cute, and the tiny ones with heads no bigger than his palm, every time he drew blood, even Kwon Sejin felt a pang of tenderness because they were so adorable.

“I think I really like children now.”

In his first week at the children’s hospital, Kwon Sejin said this while eating with Cheon Sejoo. Thanks to Kwon Sejin’s job change, they finally had some free time to eat dinner, talk, and be intimate whenever Cheon Sejoo dropped by the house for a while.

Hearing Kwon Sejin speak, Cheon Sejoo somehow chuckled softly, his throat vibrating. Then he opened a water bottle, took a sip, and squinted at Kwon Sejin, teasing:

“Why? Because your mental age matches theirs?”

“…..”

Hearing that, Kwon Sejin squinted and glared at him, swallowed the egg in his mouth, and replied:

“Don’t you like me because our mental ages are similar? If people heard our conversation, they’d think you’re an immature high school student.”

“But my face is still that age, really. Do you want to call me ‘hyung’?”

Like Kwon Sejin, Cheon Sejoo never lost in verbal sparring. Hearing the word “hyung,” Kwon Sejin blushed and shook his head. “Eat your food,” he mumbled and focused on his meal.

He had to eat quickly and then take Cheon Sejoo to the hotel, where he would “rot” until tomorrow. Because time was short, it couldn’t be wasted on joking around.

“I’m leaving, Kwon Sejin.”

When he had finished packing his luggage, Cheon Sejoo got out of the car in front of the hotel, then lightly kissed Kwon Sejin’s cheek and said that. The teasing tone made Kwon Sejin tilt his head, lightly bite his chin, then release him. “Don’t do that,” he warned, then kissed Cheon Sejoo’s cheek and waved goodbye.

“If you can stop by tomorrow, text me. I’ll pick you up.”

“Okay.”

Cheon Sejoo took Kwon Sejin’s hand, gently bit his fingertip. Then he kissed the red mark left behind, squeezed his hand tightly, then released it and got out of the car. Kwon Sejin waited until he was out of sight, saw Cheon Sejoo enter the hotel lobby, and then started the car. He had to go home to clean up.

While Sejin was doing his “unofficial housework,” peaceful time passed.

A few months later, Shin Gyo Yeon finally smoothly took over as DG chairman. The long nights staying up in the strategy room finally ended. And before a new project began, the planning department members received a short leave.

“Sejin, I have a few days off. I’ll pick you up from the hospital this afternoon. Let’s go out this weekend. Let’s eat out tonight, and we can talk.”

10:25 AM

When he returned home after an all-night celebration with his teammates, it was when Kwon Sejin was busiest. Cheon Sejoo left him a message and immediately took a shower, then climbed into bed, hugging Kwon Sejin’s pillow tightly and falling asleep as if knocked out.

In his heart, he wanted to sleep until tomorrow, but he couldn’t let the short vacation go to waste, so after five hours, he sprang up. Sejin’s quitting time had arrived.

Cheon Sejoo lightly slapped his cheeks to wake up, showered thoroughly, then put on the sweatshirt Kwon Sejin bought him and sweatpants that reached his insteps. The recently replaced white Bentley slowly rolled out.

Cheon Sejoo stopped the car in front of the hospital, intending to smoke a cigarette while waiting for Kwon Sejin, but when he saw the children, he put the pack back in his pocket. He had been trying to quit smoking for years but still couldn’t. He couldn’t stand being cooped up in a hotel room all day without cigarettes.

While waiting bored, he suddenly looked up at the towering hospital building.

He had never seen Sejin at work. If it was the cold face dealing with drunkards in the emergency room, he could imagine it, but Sejin taking care of children… he really couldn’t imagine it at all.

Suddenly curious about Sejin’s appearance at work, Cheon Sejoo turned off the engine and got out of the car. Then he entered the hospital with a natural stride as if nothing was wrong.

It seemed the reception before dinner had ended, so the hospital was quite empty. Only around the outpatient clinic were a few children still waiting their turn with their parents, and Kwon Sejin was there in a pink nurse’s uniform, his handsome face flushed.

“Beomjun is so good. Very strong, good job.”

And it was Beomjun. Cheon Sejoo chuckled softly, watching Sejin comfort the sobbing child. The little one looked barely a year old. His hair was tied in an apple style, his face red, his tiny finger being bandaged with an alcohol swab by Kwon Sejin, probably after a blood draw.

“This kid is usually so shy, but he’s not crying today.”

The woman who looked like Beomjun’s mother was clutching Sejin’s nurse uniform collar, laughing loudly as she watched the whimpering child. Cheon Sejoo, who happened to see the scene, slightly pursed his lips, showing slight displeasure.

An absurd thought suddenly flashed through his mind, how good it would be if he could have a child. How adorable would a child like Kwon Sejin be. Whether it was a girl or a boy, they would surely be cute and lovable.

No way… I can’t have children? As soon as that silly thought passed, a series of medical facts immediately appeared in Cheon Sejoo’s mind, confirming that men cannot get pregnant. It was impossible.

He shook his head, clicking his tongue softly in regret. Even though he knew it was utterly absurd, if men could give birth, perhaps the low birth rate problem would have been solved. If it were possible, he would have had at least five children for Sejin long ago. With that absurd thought, Cheon Sejoo crossed his arms, quietly watching Sejin.

The tall, handsome man sitting in the pediatric waiting room made many people around secretly glance at him. But then everyone guessed he was a family member bringing a child for examination, so they didn’t pay any more attention. Cheon Sejoo casually accepted those gazes, only focusing on waiting for Sejin to come out with his bag.

Finally, at 5 PM, Sejin went into the staff room to change, put on his backpack, and walked out. When he bowed to his colleagues, they waved back warmly.

Before leaving, Sejin even made eye contact with the child named Beomjun, who was waiting for blood test results ahead, then strode forward. When he spotted Cheon Sejoo sitting near the exit, his eyes widened in surprise. Sejin looked around quickly, then hurried over, grabbed his hand, and pulled him up.

“When did you get here? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Just arrived. Don’t the kids get scared of you?”

“Huh?”

The irrelevant question made Sejin blink and look back at Cheon Sejoo. But Cheon Sejoo didn’t answer, just smiled and ran a hand through Sejin’s slightly messy hair after changing, then stepped into the arriving elevator, gently resting his head on Sejin’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry I can’t have children for you.”

“…What?”

The sudden apology made Sejin blush, his eyes wide as he stared at him. Children…? Sorry for not being able to have children…? Although it was a strange remark, at that very moment, an image of Cheon Sejoo holding a child appeared in Sejin’s mind. A scene so bizarre he didn’t know how to describe it, Cheon Sejoo holding a handsome boy exactly like him…

“No!”

“Huh?”

Sejin suddenly shook his head and blurted out, making Cheon Sejoo ask back in confusion. As soon as the elevator reached the first floor, Sejin quickly kissed his temple lightly and darted out of the elevator before the doors fully opened. Cheon Sejoo frowned, watching Sejin walk away quickly. He chased after him, asking as Sejin walked towards the parked car:

“Sejin, what’s ‘no’?”

“Just imagining you holding a child exactly like you makes me feel uncomfortable.”

“Why? Don’t you like a child that looks like me?”

“No! If you had children, you’d have to… with another woman… Ugh, don’t talk about it anymore.”

Hearing Sejin’s next explanation, Cheon Sejoo, who was about to open the car door, stopped, turned to look at him, and burst out laughing. It seemed only eccentrics like him could imagine two men having children together.

Sejin’s words came from a completely normal thought, making Cheon Sejoo get into the driver’s seat, start the car, and tease him:

“Maybe it would look like you.”

“Are you saying I’d have a child with another woman? Don’t talk nonsense, Cheon Sejoo.”

Sejin frowned and glared at him. It was hard to imagine anything beyond reality. Cheon Sejoo was chuckling, his shoulders shaking, and asked again frankly:

“So what if I had a child?”

“…..”

Sejin froze, his face incredulous. His lips slightly parted, his eyes blank as if wondering if this person was crazy. He watched Cheon Sejoo driving for a moment, then tilted his head towards the driver’s seat, sniffing.

“Are you drinking? You’re not driving drunk, are you?”

“No.”

“Then why are you talking nonsense? How can two men have children?”

“I’m just joking.”

“At least talk about things that could happen, then I’ll answer. Cheon Sejoo, you’re sometimes really strange.”

Sejin squinted and shook his head. Cheon Sejoo burst into laughter again as if he had heard something very funny. As he leisurely pressed the gas towards the restaurant, he suddenly remembered he hadn’t greeted him yet, so he reached out his right hand, gently stroked Sejin’s cheek, and said:

“You worked hard today.”

“Yeah, you’re off until the weekend, right? Are you planning to go anywhere?”

Although he hadn’t received a reply, Sejin had probably read the message. When he heard him ask, Cheon Sejoo lightly tapped the steering wheel, pondered for a moment, then glanced at the rearview mirror, gesturing towards the trunk.

Inside were the tent and some camping gear he had just bought. Bought for a camping trip just for the two of them, although not fully equipped, the basic items for a day trip were all there. Cheon Sejoo wondered if sounds would escape if they made love in the tent, if he could entwine with Sejin without moaning, then unconsciously asked:

“How about we go stargazing. Let’s go camping…”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

“No, how about fishing? By the river.”

“Yeah. Fishing is fun too.”

“…Or climb Hallasan?”

“That’s good too.”

No matter what he asked, Sejin never refused. He answered immediately without thinking. Cheon Sejoo slightly curved his lips, a gentle smile appearing on his face, looking at Sejin who was unusually obedient today.

“Do you like it no matter where I suggest we go?”

“Yeah.”

“Even if it’s a thorny path?”

At that question, Sejin silently looked at Cheon Sejoo. He probed his expression, trying to guess what he was saying, if anything was wrong. But Cheon Sejoo’s deep eyes only held stillness. The unwavering gaze told him it was just a joke.

Sejin intertwined his hand with his, smiling as he replied:

“If I’m with you, anywhere is fine. Even if you want to die together for no reason, I’ll do it.”

“…”

Sejin said that so lightly, but for Cheon Sejoo, it fell like a heavy weight in his world. Before the weight of that heart, everything within him settled. A feeling of absolute stability that nothing could shake.

He smiled silently, squeezed Sejin’s hand nestled in his palm, and said:

“Me too. Anywhere you are, is good.”

No matter what happened, as long as he was with Kwon Sejin, Cheon Sejoo felt he could endure and overcome anything. Even if he was swallowed by the pain of the past again, as long as Sejin was by his side, he wouldn’t fall.

He leaned towards Sejin, kissed his unbearably adorable lover’s cheek, then pressed his lips to those soft lips and smiled.

No fear, no pain, no hesitation. Just a peaceful day filled with Sejin.

<Epilogue, The End>