Passion Raga Novel (Completed) - Chapter 73

If he wasn’t saved this time, he would be hurt incomparably more than before, Ling Xinlu said, threateningly, clutching the blanket.

In truth, he wanted to grab Yuri’s wrist, which was not even a handspan away, but he was too afraid to touch it, fearing that Yuri might push him away or that he might not be willing, so he just tightly clutched the blanket until the knuckles of his fist turned white.

A small, monotonous mechanical sound was heard.

Yuri, who had his laptop on his lap, raised his head. Looking at the clock that chimed every hour on the hour, he realized it was already well past evening. He seemed to have been lost in thought for a while, and time had flown by quickly.

“…”

Yuri looked towards the entrance, where no one was. After looking at the entrance where Ling Xinlu’s shoes were not visible for a moment, he checked his phone. Seeing that there were no particular messages, it seemed about time for Ling Xinlu to return.

Ling Xinlu, who went back to his family home every weekend for dinner, had gone to his family home late this afternoon as well.

Normally Yuri would have accompanied him, but his physical condition hadn’t improved much, so he stayed home alone.

(Yuri had said he could move enough and wanted to go, but Ling Xinlu flatly shook his head and told him to rest, saying he would be back quickly.)

If he had dinner with his relatives and talked for a while, he might return late at night, but if he only finished dinner and came back quickly, it was about time for him to arrive.

And Yuri guessed that Ling Xinlu would return early, even though he hadn’t explicitly said when he would be back.

There was no particular reason. However, the contract expiration date was tomorrow. To be precise, the contract ended at midnight today. So before that—tonight—Yuri had to answer Ling Xinlu’s “assignment” regarding the contract renewal.

Perhaps because of that, Ling Xinlu seemed to be preoccupied since morning.

He wasn’t acting strangely or spaced out, but he was somehow restless and couldn’t sit still, like someone anticipating an important outing.

Yuri wondered, “Surely, the reason he’s like this isn’t entirely because today is the deadline?”

He saw Ling Xinlu going out to the veranda for a long time since morning, looking down outside, then going to the bathroom to take his second shower of the day, then stopping in the middle of drinking coffee to brew tea, then flipping through a few pages of one book only to pull out another. Yuri thought, “Surely not…”

Then, sometime in the afternoon, Yuri suddenly remembered it was the weekend.

‘Mr. Ling Xinlu.’

Thinking he should start getting ready to go to his family home, Yuri called out to Ling Xinlu, who was out on the veranda staring blankly downwards.

At that moment, Ling Xinlu flinched noticeably and recoiled, then turned his head like lightning. With a whoosh, even before Yuri’s call of ‘Mr. Ling Xinlu’ had finished, his eyes, looking at Yuri, were extremely glossy.

Seeing those eyes, which seemed to contain a mixture of anxiety, nervousness, anticipation, and yearning, Yuri remained silent for a moment.

He somehow understood why he had been restlessly wandering around the house since morning. At the same time, he felt a pang of guilt, as if he had done something terribly wrong by calling him just now.

‘Yes? Did you call me just now?’

Ling Xinlu quickly entered the living room from the veranda and sat in the seat opposite Yuri. Unconsciously mimicking Yuri, he sat upright with his hands on his knees, gazing quietly. Yuri was momentarily speechless in front of him.

‘Shouldn’t you be going to your family home today?’

When Yuri spoke, as expected, the light in Ling Xinlu’s face immediately extinguished. He looked clearly disappointed that it wasn’t the words he had hoped for, but he tried hard not to show it on his face, nodding calmly, ‘Yes, that’s right.’

‘Then you should start getting ready to go out.’

Yuri placed the book he was holding down and made a motion to get up. Then, a heavy ache in his lower back made him stop his movement and quietly sigh.

He was still hurting from hitting the corner of the table hard a few days ago when it wobbled. Moreover, his stamina had significantly dropped, and his body was not recovering well.

Although he could move reasonably well now, on the day of the incident, he couldn’t get out of bed all day.

As soon as Yuri put his hand on his waist and sighed, Ling Xinlu sprang up. And quickly, he gently pushed Yuri back into his seat.

‘I’ll go by myself, so please rest. Mr. Gable doesn’t need to come.’

Ling Xinlu said, “Why would Mr. Gable need to go when I’m just going to eat and come back? He’d just be waiting outside anyway.” But Yuri shook his head.

“No, I’m fine now. I promised Fei I’d lend her a book the day before yesterday and we’re meeting today, and there’s no problem at all with me moving around.”

“I’m really fine,” Yuri said, even waving his hand. In the past few days, Ling Xinlu had been treating Yuri as if he were an invalid, to exaggerate a bit, not even letting him walk on his own two feet.

In the past few days, Ling Xinlu had truly been gentle with Yuri. He showed nothing but smiles and always adjusted his actions to Yuri as if he were a tongue in his mouth.

His careful touch was consistently polite, and his voice when speaking to Yuri was always soft.

Only his gaze, filled with warmth, stared at Yuri without hiding its true feelings.

“…Fei?”

Ling Xinlu tilted his head and repeated the name, and for a moment, a smile seemed to vanish from his face, but it was only for a very brief moment.

He smiled gently and said, “I’ll take that book on my way. Don’t worry and just rest,” then placed his hand on Yuri’s thigh, who was trying to get up again, pressing down firmly to prevent him from rising.

Seeing his expression, Yuri figured he was truly set on going alone, so he could only look at him with a troubled expression and nod, “Yes.”

He figured he should send a short message to Fei later.

Afterward, Ling Xinlu lingered near Yuri for a while longer, then left the house later than usual.

Leaving the words, “I’ll just eat and be right back,” Ling Xinlu, who was stepping out the door, stopped for a moment at the entrance and stared blankly at Yuri.

His face, vaguely shadowed with anxiety, trembled uneasily before the deadline—tonight after returning from his family home.

Yuri said nothing to him, who must have been filled with all sorts of thoughts: “What if, by any chance, surely not, but still…” He stared at Yuri like that for a moment, then said, “Then I’ll be back,” and closed the door. Yuri sighed.

He wasn’t doing it on purpose.

He had noticed that Ling Xinlu had been subtly watching Yuri since morning—no, in fact, for several days already—and every time Yuri called him, he would look at his lips with eyes filled with nervous anticipation.

What kind of answer would he give? Would he sign the contract with “Lifetime” written on it? Or, surely not.

He knew that anxiety and hope were gnawing at him day by day.

Yet, his delay in answering was not intentional.

“But I didn’t want to lightly make a promise I might not be able to keep.”

Yuri gazed at the empty spot where Ling Xinlu, who had been anxiously staring at him, had been sitting, and whispered towards the vacant space.

In fact, the answer had already come. Yuri already knew how he would answer him.

He didn’t want to see Ling Xinlu in pain. That was the answer.

He wasn’t sure if he could truly love him in the way he desired—greedily, yearning for his every fiber, wishing to wholly possess him. No, he probably couldn’t.

A person’s personality cannot fundamentally change, and Yuri knew his own nature well. The part that Ling Xinlu had called ‘bland grass’ would ultimately not change.

However.

“—Try, even if you have to force yourself.” “—Make the promise and be sure to keep it.”

Ling Xinlu’s pleas, spoken like that, echoed in his ears. In the end, he wanted to grant whatever Ling Xinlu wished for, and he didn’t want to see him disappointed and tormented. Therefore, the answer he would give was decided.

The reason he had delayed his answer was because it was his own effort. In every single moment, Yuri was striving to like him more, to see him in the way he desired. He didn’t know when that effort would bear fruit, but he would continue to try.

But now Yuri had reached a conclusion, and all that remained was to sign the contract and hand it to Ling Xinlu when he returned. Once that happened, he would remain here, by Ling Xinlu’s side, at least for a while. For several years, or more, perhaps even much longer than he expected.

Yuri checked the laptop screen displaying “Confirmed” and closed the window. Once he made up his mind, he didn’t hesitate to organize and handle the tasks that needed to be done.

He closed the laptop and looked at the clock again. If Ling Xinlu was just coming back after dinner, it felt like it was about time for him to arrive, Yuri thought, and suddenly realized that perhaps he himself was subtly anxious.

He had just become aware of it, but he had been looking at the clock and thinking of Ling Xinlu multiple times already.

“…”

Yuri picked up his phone. He fiddled with the phone, which still had no messages indicating he would be late, and thought for a moment about calling Ling Xinlu.

He became curious about where he was and when he would return. And he felt that if he asked such things, Ling Xinlu would probably be very happy.

Thinking that perhaps ‘effort’ wouldn’t be as difficult as he had expected, Yuri began to press the buttons on his phone.

However, just as he pressed the call button after dialing Ling Xinlu’s number, the phone suddenly began to ring.

“…”

The moment the message “Incoming Call” appeared on the screen, he thought it would be Ling Xinlu, but the number below it was someone else’s. The long string of numbers, indicating a call from abroad, looked familiar.

“Yuri. You called earlier, they said.”

The man who spoke his business as soon as he answered the phone was James, always swamped with work due to his difficult superior.

“Yes, James. I told Lucy what I needed. Didn’t she tell you?”

“She did. What do you mean you’re clearing out your house?”

From the other end of the line, it seemed as if James was frowning.

“It means what it says. I want to dispose of my apartment in Berlin, and I’d like to ask you to handle the process.”

“Why suddenly? As if you’re not coming back.”

“I don’t think I’ll be going back. For a while.”

Silence fell on the other end of the line. Yuri quietly waited for him to speak.

“For a while, you say? How long?” James asked curtly. His voice, asking ‘how long,’ became even more sullen, suggesting he thought something was amiss.

“I’m not sure. For now, it’s a lifetime contract.”

“Lifetime?!”

His voice suddenly seemed to triple in volume. Yuri held the receiver slightly away from his ear and replied, “Yes.”

“Why a lifetime suddenly? You don’t do lifetime contracts?!”

“Yes, but it seems I’ll be doing one this time.”

“Then you should have done it with our company a long time ago! Where is it, are you renewing the contract with Linga?”

“Yes.”

More precisely, it should be Ling Xinlu personally rather than Linga, but Yuri didn’t go into detail. He figured they would meet soon anyway, so there was no need to prolong the conversation over the phone.

“What’s with this suddenness? I thought you’d come back to Germany after this current contract term, so I’ve already sorted out the tasks to entrust you with.”

“That’s why I’m contacting you first.”

“I just decided a little while ago,” Yuri added.

James grumbled as if betrayed by a trusted colleague, complaining and questioning, “Shouldn’t priority be given to a party with whom you’ve had multiple contracts before for a lifetime contract?” and “What about the possibility of short-term contracts in the future?” and so on.

James truly seemed disappointed. Not only was he losing a talent like Yuri Gable, but the quick-witted Yuri thought that most of the tasks he had prepared for Yuri upon his return were likely related to cleaning up after Kyle’s behavior.