Passion Raga Novel (Completed) - Chapter 49

The gaze that had been fixed on Yuri, as if to devour him, finally, as if it couldn’t bear it, bit into Yuri’s nape. Not just his nape, but his shoulder, earlobe, chest—biting and sucking wherever it touched, leaving marks.

“Does it feel good? Does it feel that good? ——Yes, as much as you want.”

The low, hoarse, excited voice whispered like a ragged sigh.

Not long after, the hand that had been soaking and opening Yuri’s body left its place. But even after the hand was gone, the tight, opened foreign sensation remained, throbbing in that spot. Soon, a fierce heat, endlessly pushing in, replaced it, burrowing in and settling.

He couldn’t breathe.

Unable to comprehend anything amidst the sensation of being forced in, as if his tight body would burst, he instinctively hugged whatever was in front of him. Embracing the sweat-soaked body that filled his arms, Yuri began to be chased by a fiery sensation, a terrifying exhilaration, pushing into his body.

And after that——his mind turned blank.

For a while, Yuri didn’t even realize he was awake. Slowly blinking, blinking, staring blankly at the ceiling, he didn’t even know he was seeing something, just blinking like an automaton with a blank mind.

He became conscious because of a change in the sensation he hadn’t noticed before. At some point, the sound of water from the bathroom had stopped.

And only then did the thought, ‘The sound of water stopped,’ surface in his consciousness, and his thoughts came alive, one by one.

For a moment, he wished he could lose consciousness again.

As soon as his thoughts started to return, he became aware of his body, aching in every joint yet too heavy to move a single finger. He realized his situation, sprawled in the middle of the living room, strewn with clothes and liquor bottles. Then, his memories returned.

Not all memories remained perfectly intact.

There were hazy, dreamlike memories first, then a period of blankness where nothing could be recalled, and after that, the consciousness that had continued since he woke up at some point.

Yes, it seemed he had been awake for several hours already. He only realized that now.

After losing consciousness and then regaining it without knowing when, the first thing he noticed was the sky outside the living room’s full-length window, beginning to lighten faintly. Perhaps, it was around the time he usually went for a swim, so his body had habitually woken him up.

And next, he noticed Ling Xinlu, sprawled diagonally over his body, lying face up like an overturned frog.

“Are you awake? …Are you conscious this time? …Not yet?”

Seeing him say that, it seemed he had asked the question many times. Come to think of it, he vaguely remembered hearing those words in his hazy memories.

He was slowly swaying his hips. And in rhythm with that movement, Yuri also swayed, lying down. It was because their lower bodies were connected.

While he was still staring blankly at him, unable to tell if he was still dreaming or if this was reality, Ling Xinlu’s face, looking down at Yuri, seemed to contort for a moment. Along with that, the movement of his lower body, pushing up and swaying, paused briefly.

In his lower body, where sensations had already dulled and faded, a moment later, a damp sensation ran down along his gluteal cleft.

Not only his buttocks but also below his waist, down his back, his entire lower body was soaked and sticky.

Surely, he didn’t keep doing it even while I was unconscious?

While he vaguely thought no way, his penis, deeply buried between his legs, slipped out. As the penis that had been blocking him withdrew, the semen filling him gushed out, once again drenching below his buttocks.

His body reflexively trembled.

“Are you awake? …Are you awake this time? …Oh. Are you still not conscious?”

Ling Xinlu, who had been muttering quietly, let out a low click of his tongue. He licked his eyelids, then his lips. Like a cat. He definitely thought there had been a leopard earlier, but it seemed the cat had returned.

“Go to sleep for a bit. Though you’ll close your eyes again without me saying anything. …I’m starting to get tired too, so I should rest for a while.”

“Perhaps it’s because it’s been a while, my stamina is quickly depleted,” Ling Xinlu muttered, then lay down on his side next to Yuri.

Stamina depletion… what was that…? It somehow feels different from what I know… Yuri vaguely thought to himself.

Ling Xinlu, who said he was tired, didn’t seem to be falling asleep, though. He looked languid, but lay on his side, propped on his head, staring intently at Yuri. With one hand, he slowly stroked Yuri’s body.

“——Something strange seems to have happened.”

Yuri tried to murmur that, still staring blankly at the ceiling.

But no words came out. His lips seemed to move slightly, but only air escaped from his dry, hoarse throat.

Yuri gave up and closed his mouth.

Ling Xinlu, looking down at Yuri, tilted his head. “What did you say?”

“Was it good?”

Hearing this, he somehow felt a little angry.

“Gabel-ssi came so many times yesterday… Your stamina is really good. You kept whimpering and clinging, so I kept going without rest too.” It didn’t matter. But these weren’t the words he wanted to hear from this man. Yuri closed his eyes. A voice asked quietly, as if to himself, Are you going to sleep?

Even after Yuri closed his eyes, he continued to stroke Yuri’s body, just like stroking a cat. Sometimes he stroked his head, and sometimes his buttocks. Sometimes he even fiddled with his limp, flaccid penis.

With a feeling of whatever happens, happens—in reality, still too dazed for his thoughts to properly function—he lay there motionless. But he never would have guessed that Ling Xinlu, who seemed to be resting for a moment, would again push his hips between Yuri’s legs.

It was his first time experiencing his consciousness flying away while his eyes were open.

Next to Yuri, who was limp to the point of being unable to move a single finger, Ling Xinlu soon walked out of the bathroom where the sound of water had stopped.

If Yuri’s memory, which was intermittently blank but somehow connected, was correct, Ling Xinlu hadn’t slept a wink all night. Yet, he emerged from the shower with a fresh face, as if he had just had a full night’s sleep.

Ling Xinlu looked at Yuri, who was staring blankly at him, while drying his hair with a towel. Then he casually walked towards the kitchen.

He barely opened his mouth, but the words caught in his throat and wouldn’t come out properly. However, the sound, like escaping air, somehow reached his ears.

Ling Xinlu, walking towards the kitchen, paused his steps. And he looked back at Yuri, his eyes widening slightly.

“Are you awake? …Are you really awake this time?”

The skeptical addition to his words indicated that he had already asked the question several times. And Yuri, who must have heard the question with his eyes open each time without responding, this time turned his gaze to look at him.

Oh, he’s awake, Ling Xinlu muttered in surprise, turning to go back, but paused, then turned back to the kitchen. He poured a cup of lukewarm water and returned with long strides.

“Here. You were looking for water, right?”

He was right.

Yuri slowly swallowed the water Ling Xinlu helped him drink. More than half of it spilled, but even a few sips moistened his lips and throat, and he felt his mind clearing.

“Are you feeling better? Yesterday, you kept waking up and passing out, unable to get your wits about you, almost in shock from feeling too much, so I was a bit worried.”

He wanted to ask, Me? but said nothing. He was tired to death. Both body and mind.

Yuri only moved his eyes to look at the clock. It was already morning, when people would be actively moving, and outside, cars were constantly passing by below the mansion.

Yuri looked suspiciously at Ling Xinlu, who looked impossibly fresh despite clearly having pulled an all-nighter. Had he really slept with this man? He couldn’t understand many things.

But most of all, he couldn’t understand this situation.

Although there were gaps, his memory wasn’t completely gone. He couldn’t claim now that he didn’t know why he was like this, or what had happened between him and Ling Xinlu. He even vaguely remembered why it had happened.

But.

The reason his mind was so confused, more than anything, after getting into trouble while drunk and waking up in the same bed, was:

He didn’t know what would happen next.

After unexpectedly forming such a relationship, Yuri had no idea what kind of face to show his partner, what to say, or how they should proceed. He had never been in such a situation before.

“Don’t you remember well? Someone went to great lengths, with all their heart and soul, to serve you.”

At that moment, Ling Xinlu, who was crouched in front of Yuri, looking at him, spoke. Yuri blinked. Ling Xinlu sighed, Hmm, without any particular expression, and patted his wet hair dry with his hand.

“I never imagined I’d end up like this with Gabel-ssi either, but it just happened. I don’t sleep with anyone if I don’t feel like it, no matter how much they say they like me. …I really put in a lot of effort to serve you.”

A playful glint appeared in his smiling face as he said the last words. Yuri stared blankly at that face, then mumbled, “…Yes, you did.”

The chaotic feeling in his heart seemed to subside a little. The sudden feeling of awkwardness about this confusing situation faded because Ling Xinlu’s attitude hadn’t changed at all from before last night.

How to deal with this situation, how to face it—such thoughts seemed unnecessary from the start. Ling Xinlu spoke as if an unexpected, light, and insignificant incident had occurred.

Is that so. …Well, I guess so.

He wasn’t a child to make a big fuss about “what about our relationship now,” and neither he nor this man were those kinds of personalities. Well, given this man’s personality, he might, depending on the situation, deliberately cause trouble and then insist on responsibility, but at any rate, that wasn’t the case now. Didn’t he say it?

Effort-serving.

Feeling like he received “effort-serving” in bed felt subtle, somehow. It definitely wasn’t a pleasant feeling.

Ling Xinlu, seeing Yuri sitting idly, staring down at his lap, briefly dropped the smile from his face.

“Are you angry?”

Yuri looked at him, who was watching him with a serious face, and shook his head. “No,” he answered quietly but clearly, and the faint anxiety that had appeared on Ling Xinlu’s face was replaced by relief.

Why would he be angry? He wasn’t forced, and although his memory was hazy, Yuri knew he had definitely “liked” it. He still felt a lingering thrill below, and he had no intention of saying he didn’t enjoy it now. He wasn’t angry. It was just that the feeling was subtly ambiguous, hard to put into words.

“…Was it good?”

Again, this time the opposite question from a moment ago flew towards him. The eyes creased in a smile held the lovely, cat-like sparkle as usual.

Yuri hesitated for a moment, then nodded silently. The sensation was so overwhelming at the time that he didn’t remember the exact feeling, but it was good. In fact, among the several relationships he’d had in his life—though he hadn’t had a particularly tumultuous romantic history—it was the most overwhelming experience. To the point where he wondered if his true nature was always leaning this way.

In front of Yuri, who silently nodded, Ling Xinlu also smiled broadly.

“It was good for me too. No, actually, it was quite good. Good enough to make the effort once.”

He looked satisfied, like a well-fed cat, then grimaced slightly. “Yesterday just happened to turn out this way, so I can’t say it will happen again.” He muttered, almost to himself. But as he said the last part, he looked at Yuri again and gave him a beautiful smile.

“If I feel like it next time, well…”

There, he ended his sentence. Then, with the towel he had been drying his wet hair with, he gently wiped Yuri’s face, where tears or saliva were sticky and dry.

If I feel like it next time, he didn’t say the rest, but the implied continuation was easy to guess.

——I’ll do it for you. ——I’ll serve you.

Yuri stared blankly at Ling Xinlu, then dropped his gaze. He calmly let his face be gently wiped by the towel, thinking, No, I don’t particularly want that…

It wasn’t enough to refuse outright, but he didn’t particularly want it either. Even though the memory of last night wasn’t bad—the sweet, aching sensation still faintly lingered in his body—it was true.

Perhaps it was just his mood right now.

Yuri looked at Ling Xinlu with a heart as heavy as his languid body. When their eyes met, Ling Xinlu tilted his head and smiled, unchanged from usual.

At least one thing was fortunate. He could treat him as he always had, without feeling awkward about Ling Xinlu being his usual self.

Plop… plop.

Lying in the water, slowly exhaling a breath, one gulp, two gulps, and air bubbles danced up, sparkling and round. The bubbles, swelling larger as they neared the surface, finally burst with a pop upon reaching the surface. And what remained was a gently rippling circle.

Such small things were good.

Yuri watched the dancing air bubbles as he exhaled the air in his lungs, gulp by gulp. Only after exhaling the very last breath from his chest and watching that air bubble reach the surface, did he slowly…

“Don’t you remember well? Someone went to great lengths, with all their heart and soul, to serve you.”

At that moment, Ling Xinlu, who was crouched in front of Yuri, looking at him, spoke. Yuri blinked. Ling Xinlu sighed, Hmm, without any particular expression, and patted his wet hair dry with his hand.

“I never imagined I’d end up like this with Gabel-ssi either, but it just happened. I don’t sleep with anyone if I don’t feel like it, no matter how much they say they like me. …I really put in a lot of effort to serve you.”