Passion Raga Novel (Completed) - Chapter 17

Yuri, who had paused for a moment, slowly approached him, who was looking down, too miserable to even say “don’t look.”

Don’t come. Don’t look. Go away.

He wanted to say that, but standing beside Ling Xinlu, who sat frozen, only tears wetting his cheeks in overwhelming frustration that prevented even those words from coming out, Yuri gently placed the soft towel on his cheek.

“I’ll give you a real bullet later. So…”

Whether it’s a miserable sight or a shameful state, don’t force it down; reveal it. Consider me someone who will disappear, and don’t let me make you more miserable. He swallowed the rest of his words. He felt that those words would only cause him more pain.

However, Ling Xinlu seemed to have understood the unspoken words. Twitch, his stiff mouth trembled.

“Ha. You must be a mind reader.”

“Very occasionally.”

Ling Xinlu glanced sideways, glaring fiercely at Yuri, and seemed about to say something more, but then closed his mouth again, as if disinclined.

“………” 

“………”

Silence flowed.

Yuri, who was wiping Ling Xinlu’s cheek, saw that his tears had stopped and removed the towel. Then, he suddenly looked at his jaw. Over his gaunt face, a faint, almost invisible stubble had grown.

Yuri himself shaved daily, yet he found it strangely fascinating and stared at it for a while. It was both curious and somehow a little cute, but he thought it would look unsightly if it grew for another day or two.

“I told you not to look. Your gaze makes me uncomfortable.”

He seemed to be holding back for a moment, but perhaps because Yuri had stared for too long, a harsh remark finally flew out. An uncomfortable gaze, he hadn’t looked with any particular intention, but Yuri lowered his eyes slightly, then raised them again.

“Shall I shave your beard?”

Ling Xinlu looked at Yuri. At first, he frowned, looking up as if he had misheard or misunderstood, but then, seeing Yuri’s calm expression, he seemed to confirm that his ears had heard correctly, and a hint of bewilderment flickered across his face.

“I’ll go prepare some warm water.”

Yuri said that and turned around. He felt Ling Xinlu’s incredulous gaze on the back of his head, but he paid no mind and went into the bathroom, gathering towels, water, shaving foam, and a razor. Even in a special room at a famous hospital, it wasn’t a hotel, so it wasn’t perfectly equipped with everything; there was only a disposable razor.

Carrying these items, Yuri returned to the hospital room and stood beside Ling Xinlu, who was still sitting motionless like a doll.

When he placed the towel soaked in warm water on Ling Xinlu’s face, Ling Xinlu’s mouth seemed to twitch, but no words came back. Yuri applied shaving foam to his jaw and began to move the razor blade.

Swish. Swish. Following the path of the razor blade moving over the foam, smooth, white skin was revealed. Tracing over it with his hand to confirm the smooth texture, Yuri moved the razor blade slowly but skillfully.

Now that he looked, there was still fine hair on his earlobes. His cheeks were also fair and soft.

Even though he knew perfectly well that his outer appearance and inner self were different, it still pained Yuri anew to think that such a young person had to endure this. His hand naturally became more careful as he stroked Ling Xinlu’s cheek.

“You perverted bastard.”

Suddenly, Ling Xinlu mumbled.

His jaw moved abruptly, and Yuri almost cut him. He quickly pulled back the razor blade and checked if he had cut him. Fortunately, he seemed unharmed.

Yuri, who had been too focused on checking his jaw to even register the insult, exhaled in relief. Just then, Ling Xinlu, who had been looking down all along, raised his eyes. Their large, dark eyes met.

“Touching someone secretly while they’re sleeping.”

Yuri blinked at Ling Xinlu’s sarcastic remark. He thought about what that meant, then remembered he had done that yesterday. He thought Ling Xinlu was too preoccupied to care about such things, but he had remembered it all and was attacking him now that he was a little calmer.

Yuri scratched his head.

He had never had such perverse thoughts that he couldn’t tell others, so the word “pervert” felt a little unfair, and he hadn’t had any ill intentions when he stroked him yesterday. Still, he couldn’t protest when the person who could be considered the victim said such a thing.

“I thought you were staring blankly whenever you had a chance, but now that I’m rolling in the abyss, too tired to even get angry, you like touching me however you please?”

Ling Xinlu sneered coldly, his gaze fixed on Yuri. Yuri thought for a moment, then mumbled, “I guess so.”

“It only just occurred to me, but yes. I don’t dislike it.”

And with just one stroke, he slowly removed the last remaining foam from Ling Xinlu’s jaw with the razor blade. He put down the razor and picked up the wet towel.

“Anyway, I’ll probably die by your hand soon, so isn’t it okay to leave some good memories before that? Please have that much mercy.”

Yuri wrapped Ling Xinlu’s face with a cool towel and slowly rubbed it. Ling Xinlu’s dark gaze, which had been looking up at Yuri, seemed to lower slightly, then he closed his eyes. The cool towel seemed to soothe not just his face but his mind as well; he didn’t seem to mind it.

His eyelashes were long too. They were as black as his soft, lustrous hair. His well-shaped eyebrows too.

Yuri could understand why the fastidious and ruthless Ling Hwirung cherished his youngest son like a treasure.

Yuri removed the towel with a slight sense of regret.

“All done.”

In front of Yuri, who was gathering his things, Ling Xinlu’s eyes snapped open. He looked at Yuri, who was picking up the towel and water bowl with an expressionless face, then opened his mouth. “Then now.”

“Give me the live bullet you mentioned earlier.”

“………”

Yuri, who was about to go to the bathroom, stopped mid-step and looked down at him. This time, Ling Xinlu was looking at Yuri with eyes that gleamed black, as if he was determined to shoot him in the head.

“In a week.”

Yuri answered calmly, thinking that when that time came, he would ask someone to deliver the live bullet to him and quickly head to the airport.

“Until then, I can’t leave your side, as Mr. Ling Tangwin asked me to.”

I said I’d give you a live bullet later, but I never said I’d give it to you today, did I? Yuri added silently and turned away. He pretended not to see Ling Xinlu’s eyes, which were flaring up fiercely in anger.

A chilling aura, almost murderous, briefly tingled the back of his neck, but it was still much better than seeing him sitting in such a miserable state, like he had been in the abyss just moments ago.

“You… you perverted swindler and liar!”

A furious shout erupted from behind him. At the same time, a kick landed on Yuri’s backside just as he was taking a step. He didn’t fall, but he was pushed a few steps forward. Because of that, he spilled water all over the floor. The bottom of his pants was soaked.

Come to think of it, he had no change of clothes. What to do? Yuri sighed, looking down at his predicament.

The first person to visit was James.

Carrying an armful of extravagant and elegant flowers, and in his other arm, a vintage wine from a year so rare it was almost impossible to acquire even for astronomical sums, James appeared, greeting them with a perfect smile that no one would call merely businesslike.

“This is our first time meeting in person, isn’t it? I’m James Miller, working at T&R. Do you like the room?”

“This is just a small token,” James said, placing the wine on the table, then handed the bouquet to Yuri. As a result, Yuri, who was standing behind Ling Xinlu, found himself embracing the bouquet and seriously pondering, ‘This room already has flowers in every vase, what should I do with these?’

“Yes, I like it very much. In fact, I’m almost sorry that you’ve arranged such a wonderful room.”

Ling Xinlu, who had risen to greet James, extended his hand with a smile as perfect as James’s. The two men, subtly assessing each other while shaking hands with perfect smiles, were so dazzling that Yuri couldn’t look directly at them for a moment. ‘I’ll have to find a vase later, but for now, I suppose I should put them in the bathtub,’ he mumbled, loud enough to be heard, and walked towards the bathroom.

It was afternoon when Ling Xinlu moved from the hospital to the hotel.

Yuri had suggested he stay longer in the hospital as his physical condition wasn’t fully recovered, but Ling Xinlu firmly stated that he didn’t want to stay in a dreary hospital any longer. It was a special room, better than most hotels in terms of view and facilities, but Ling Xinlu fiercely added, ‘The hospital itself is dreary,’ so Yuri nodded in agreement.

As the party was at fault, when Yuri contacted Kyle—or more accurately, his secretary James—without delay, James booked a suite at the nearest luxury hotel. And not only that, James visited them within a couple of hours of their check-in.

“I’ve heard a lot about you. That you’re indispensable to T&R.”

Watching Ling Xinlu, who was inviting James to sit with a flawless smile, Yuri blinked as he came out after turning on the water in the bathtub where he had placed the bouquet.

He had never seen that expression before. Indeed, that must be ‘the expression the youngest son of the influential Ling family shows to the outside world.’

He had guessed that Ling Xinlu wouldn’t make the same face he did when dealing with Jung Taeui, Riegrow, or Yuri, but that was truly a ‘perfectly crafted’ face. A perfect young master who, to anyone’s eyes, had grown up well-educated and loved in a good family, yet showed no hint of sloppiness.

He must have stared too much.

Perhaps sensing his gaze, Ling Xinlu, who had been dealing with James with a smiling face, turned his eyes to Yuri. As James also turned his gaze to Yuri, Yuri saw it. Ling Xinlu’s gaze turned fierce.

Don’t look. I told you your gaze makes me uncomfortable.

He knew too well what those eyes were saying. He had heard that dozens of times today alone. (Because he hadn’t stopped staring despite hearing it, this was the result of repeated warnings.)

Yuri pretended not to notice and turned his gaze, returning James’s eye contact with a similar nod. James, clad in a high-quality suit like armor, exuded an unusually unapproachable aura today. His expression, though perfectly smiling, had eyes burning deep within. Judging by that level of anger… Kyle must have caused trouble again.

And indeed.

“But this is unexpected. I thought Mr. Kyle Riegrow would come himself, but his secretary came instead… No, please don’t misunderstand. I have no complaints about Mr. Miller at all.”

I mean, I have complaints about your boss, who is a direct family member of the culprit but didn’t come himself and sent his secretary instead, Ling Xinlu said, his words laced with barbs, and as soon as he smiled brightly, James’s smile deepened even further.

“Yes, originally Mr. Kyle should have come himself, but a chronic illness he’s suffered from for a long time suddenly flared up last night. First, I wanted to pay my respects, however insufficient, and then he intends to visit you again later. I apologize.”

“Oh dear, I hope you recover soon.”

Listening to the perfectly scripted conversation between Ling Xinlu, who responded with concern, and James, who thanked him for his concern, Yuri remained silent. Kyle must have flown off to some rural book fair or used bookstore auction last night again…

James was living a pathetic life.

He possessed several high-level certifications that others struggled for years to obtain even one of, making him a versatile talent useful in many areas. He never got stuck when asked anything, and of course, he received a salary that was more than adequate for his level. He also had a beautiful wife and several capable and reliable colleagues. He didn’t know for sure, but among those who knew him ‘moderately,’ there must have been many who envied his situation immensely.

However, there was one factor that instantly cast a shadow over his otherwise brilliant life when viewed from a ‘moderate’ distance: his direct superior. He was a vicious boss who refused to accept his resignation multiple times and would somehow tie him down.

Poor James. Again today.

Yuri skillfully brewed black tea and placed it between them, then went to stand behind Ling Xinlu. He habitually stood closer to the door, but soon Ling Xinlu’s brief words flew out.

“I think I told you not to stand on my right.”

“My apologies.”

Yuri bowed his head slightly and moved a couple of steps to his left rear. James looked at them quizzically, but true to his nature of never showing unnecessary expressions, he didn’t react much.

Besides “don’t look at me,” that was another thing Yuri had heard many times from Ling Xinlu. Don’t stand on my right.

‘If you’re not going to disappear, at least don’t stand on my right. It’s unpleasant to have you even in the corner of my vision.’

Ling Xinlu, who had injured his left eye, demanded that Yuri stand in his blind spot, on his left, so as not to be seen. Yuri silently accepted the demand, but sometimes he would forget it out of habit, standing in the spot closest to the door.

“Before coming here, I briefly met with Dr. Bayeren.”

James opened his mouth, moistening his lips with black tea. Yuri, with an expressionless face, perked up his ears and glanced at Ling Xinlu. Ling Xinlu, the person concerned, showed no particular reaction, simply drinking his tea and saying, “Is that so?”

“As you probably already know, to be frank, the prognosis isn’t great, but he also said that depending on how the recovery progresses with treatment, it’s not entirely hopeless.”

A slight warmth appeared in James’s eyes. Given his circumstances, James was always businesslike and decisive, but he wasn’t a bad person. He was happy himself when delivering good news. Just as Yuri was showing signs of happiness now.

Bayeren, who spoke in the most positive way possible, was not someone who would make things up. If he said that, it meant there was at least a chance worth trying.

“Not entirely hopeless…”

Ling Xinlu quietly repeated. He seemed to think for a moment, then smiled faintly.

“That’s a comforting thought.”

He replied briefly, then closed his mouth and drank his tea.

That was sarcasm. Towards the one who was in the position of the aggressor in this situation, and towards his own plight.