Passion Novel - Volume 3 - Chapter 68

Even if he hadn’t been Ilay’s adjutant, he would have likely inquired about him once or twice a day, but that was it. A two-way human relationship with this man was impossible to establish. Ilay seemed to think similarly, muttering, “Friendship,” and smiling subtly.

“The other hand,” Ilay said again. Jeong Taeui obediently swapped hands and placed it on his forehead, thinking, There’s hardly any difference in temperature between his hand and his face anymore. He shook his hand out. If a hand cooler than an ice pack was better, should he just grab some ice and hold it in his hand?

“Jeong Taeui.”

At the sudden sound of his name, Jeong Taeui looked at Ilay. Ilay, who had called his name with rare clarity, wasn’t looking at him. He seemed lost in thought, his gaze fixed somewhere in the air, murmuring to himself.

“Yes, for three days. It was you, then…”

“…? Let me tell you, I only checked to see if you were dead, I didn’t do anything. If you had some terrible dream, that wasn’t me. Even if someone tried to harm you, it was just a hallucination in your comatose state.”

Jeong Taeui quickly spoke, fearing any strange accusations. If he heard something like, ‘I was sick all over and out of my mind for three days, and it was all because of you,’ it would be difficult and utterly unfair. However, Ilay didn’t seem to intend to blame Jeong Taeui. He just stared into the air, lost in thought, then slowly turned his gaze back to Jeong Taeui after hearing his words. His eyes were smiling.

“My defense instinct is slightly better than others, so even when I fall asleep, I don’t completely lose consciousness. It’s the same even when my body is uncomfortable. One part of my consciousness is always awake, regardless of whether I can move my body freely or not.”

Hearing his slow words, Jeong Taeui quickly rummaged through his memories of the past three days. He had only regularly visited Ilay to check his condition; he hadn’t done anything that would make Ilay hold a grudge. He wondered if he had perhaps uttered some unpleasant curses, but at least in his memory, nothing of the sort had happened.

Good thing. Perhaps he was the one with a strong defense instinct. Jeong Taeui, who had inwardly muttered things like, ‘I knew you’d end up like this someday, you idiot. This is what happens when you treat people so badly. Serves you right,’ whenever he went to see the unconscious Ilay, felt relieved that he hadn’t spoken those words aloud.

“Was it that strange, seeing the guy who usually catches people like mice lying here like this?”

Ilay said, smiling calmly. The hand on Ilay’s forehead twitched slightly. Feeling that touch, Ilay’s smile deepened.

Damn it. He heard.

Jeong Taeui rolled his eyes about halfway, subtly averting his gaze. He must have been delirious with fever, yet he picked up on those words and brought them up now.

“Still, you woke up as I told you to, so it’s fine, right?”

Jeong Taeui was pondering how to reply, but Ilay seemed to read his mind and chuckled, adding, “Did I even say that?” Jeong Taeui, who had been furrowing his brow and racking his brain, thinking, Did I really say something like that?, quickly spoke first, thinking it wouldn’t get better if he kept his mouth shut.

“Yes, you woke up well. Don’t lie around sick, it doesn’t suit you. You’re still burning up.”

But as words often do, strangely, after saying that, he genuinely felt that way. Others would laugh, but it was almost pitiful to see the man who was usually terrifyingly energetic lying limp like this. …He found himself laughing at himself for thinking this, not someone else.

Jeong Taeui felt his hand on Ilay’s forehead had gotten too warm, so he changed hands and sighed, asking.

“If you were clearly hearing everything, why didn’t you say a word in response? Why did you make me worry?”

Ilay suddenly made a peculiar face but said nothing, just looking at Jeong Taeui. Soon, a subtle expression, half-smiling, half-not, appeared on his face. And then, staring intently at Jeong Taeui as if he were some extremely strange creature, he let out a soft laugh.

“I wasn’t conscious enough to reply. Anyway, this is the first time I’ve been laid up like this since I caught measles when I was a kid. All I could do was understand what was being said around me.”

“So you did catch measles, it seems.”

Jeong Taeui muttered bluntly, “I thought measles would even avoid you,” to which Ilay replied as if amused.

“You’ve been saying rude things since earlier, but I’m a normal human who gets sick and grew up playing like everyone else. Don’t most people catch measles at least once as a child? You must have too.”

Jeong Taeui pretended not to hear the first sentence and replied.

“Hmm. It was when I was three, I think, they said I was terribly ill. I don’t remember it, but they say I was sickly as a child, so, well, there’s nothing remarkable about catching measles.”

“Measles also has a high infection rate. …You must have been lying sick next to Jeong Jae-yi.”

“Well, I don’t remember that time. As far as I remember, both my brother and I grew up healthy.”

Jeong Taeui reluctantly fell silent. He didn’t want to talk about his brother at length. How should he put it? It felt like he was throwing bait to a beast.

“Even if they talk about some incomprehensible ‘Gilsangcheon’ or whatever, we both grew up normally, getting sick and playing. Both my brother and I. …If someone truly bestows good fortune, they wouldn’t let the person next to them fall ill.”

His last words sounded like a soliloquy. Since he wasn’t expecting understanding, it truly was a soliloquy.

Jeong Taeui suddenly felt burdened by those unreadable black eyes steadily gazing at him, so he removed his hand from Ilay’s forehead. The heat from Ilay’s forehead had already transferred to his hand, making it no longer cool or refreshing.

“Right. You’re definitely not my Gilsangcheon. It seems that even when I’m with you, I don’t become immune to poison or stop drinking it entirely. To me, you’re just an ordinary, common human being.”

Jeong Taeui, who had picked up the gruel bowl again, glanced at Ilay, who was muttering softly as if lost in thought, like a soliloquy. His mind wasn’t so delicate or sensitive as to be offended by words like, ‘You’re just a dime a dozen human.’ But still, he was unusually talkative today.

“Finish eating. Eat and sleep. Seeing you so coherent now, you’ll be much better tomorrow.”

“Or you’ll be completely fine with your monstrous recovery power,” Jeong Taeui added, cutting him off. Ilay, who had been staring blankly at Jeong Taeui without opening his mouth even when the gruel was brought to his lips, suddenly chuckled. His exceedingly pale hand, slowly moving to massage his other wrist and arm, was strangely annoying. It felt like a small insect irritating his nerves.

“Still, it’s not bad. No, if I had to say, rather than bad—”

Ilay, still muttering as if to himself, suddenly fell silent. And he calmly lifted his gaze to the ceiling. As if his thoughts had hit a wall.

Blink. His eyelids moved once. The hand that had been slowly massaging his arm, as if loosening stiff muscles, also stopped. Ilay, whose thoughts had hit a wall and stared intently at a point in the air for a moment, then calmly lowered his gaze. And he looked at Jeong Taeui with an expressionless face.

Not good. Something’s not good. It wasn’t a good sign that the man who usually killed people with a calm smile now had no expression on his face, and above all, it felt utterly unfamiliar. His black eyes, devoid of light, felt strangely alien. More so than when he casually grabbed someone’s neck.

“…You’re not eating?”

Jeong Taeui said as casually as possible, putting down the bowl. It felt like staying here longer would definitely not be a good idea. Moreover, if he thought about it, wasn’t this guy not in his right mind right now? He seemed perfectly normal, but what he occasionally said was clearly not his usual self. What if he suddenly went crazy and shoved a spoon down someone’s throat, or smashed the bowl and slit someone’s neck with the shards…?

“I didn’t say I wasn’t eating.”

As Jeong Taeui put down the bowl, Ilay said quietly. A faint smile, or something similar, flickered in his black eyes, which were observing Jeong Taeui in an unfamiliar way. Slowly, slowly, Jeong Taeui very slowly took his hand off the bowl, feeling as if his breath would be cut off if he even took a momentary pause. Though he spoke calmly, his voice sounded faintly hard even to his own ears.

“You seem to have the strength to lift a spoon since you’re moving, so eat it yourself. Anyway, I know you’re alive, so I’ll be going now.”

“You’ve already finished your daily tasks today, so there’s nothing else to do. Why are you rushing?”

Ilay said with a smile. His low, soft voice was like that of a witch luring a child. A voice that deliberately concealed its true nature.

What’s wrong with this guy? Why is he suddenly speaking in such a sweet, cat-like voice? This is definitely an ominous sign.

As Jeong Taeui slowly withdrew his hand and tried to put strength into his legs to stand up, Ilay quietly sighed and closed his eyes. Then, the tired and powerless appearance of someone who had been suffering from a high fever for three days covered his pale face, making Jeong Taeui flinch slightly.

“…Would you like to sit up for a bit?”

If he propped him up with a pillow, it would be easier for him to eat, so perhaps he should help him with that much before leaving.

He hesitated, mumbling, and Ilay opened his eyes again to look at Jeong Taeui. Though no words were exchanged, Jeong Taeui took his non-rejection as an invitation, leaning in to help him up.

His face drew close to Jeong Taeui’s ear. It was then that a faint, smiling voice, like the whisper of wind, brushed his earlobe.

“Your intuition is really good, you know… but sometimes your judgment doesn’t quite keep up.”

“Huh…?”

It was a weak, low voice and the hands that had been slowly massaging his wrists and arms, as if gauging how much he could move just moments before, were also slow and powerless. However, the moment Jeong Taeui slipped his hands under Ilay’s shoulders to help him up, an overwhelming strength permeated the pale hand that casually gripped his elbow.

“…!!”

In an instant, his vision spun.

As Ilay grabbed his elbow, a hand brutally seized him just below the chin, throwing him off balance.

He couldn’t control his body, suspended in mid-air—the moment that thought struck him, Jeong Taeui gasped. The bed he crashed into behind him was certainly soft, but its springs couldn’t absorb the sudden impact entirely. The man who had just moments ago been lying motionless and dying on the bed, the one who had thrown Jeong Taeui onto it, was already straddling him by the time Jeong Taeui coughed out a breath and opened his eyes.

“Changed your mind?”

Ilay was smirking. Jeong Taeui blinked once, not immediately grasping the meaning of his words, then scrunched his face into a sulk. He didn’t know what it was, but this situation was definitely not pleasant.

“Danger, you just got that feeling? Then you should have bolted right then.”

Jeong Taeui stared up at Ilay, who continued to speak in riddles, then muttered bitterly, “What is it? What are you so displeased about? Is the gruel bland? Or is it that your luck doesn’t improve even when you’re with me? If it’s the former, I might be slightly at fault, but if it’s the latter, that’s not my problem.”

Since this guy was perfectly capable of doing crazy things for no reason, there was nothing Jeong Taeui could do if he simply said “Just because.” But if he could make him say one more word, there might be a miraculous chance to escape in the interim.

However, as if Jeong Taeui’s voice didn’t reach Ilay’s ears, he asked a question completely out of context.

“During the war, soldiers deployed on an operation, who hadn’t eaten or drunk for days, with their lives hanging by a thread… if you offered them food and a woman, statistically, what would they choose…?”

With a playful addition, his smiling breath came closer to Jeong Taeui’s face.

No way, he thought.

He had been sick in bed for three days, unable to move. He hadn’t eaten anything, and even now, he was barely conscious, still burning with a high fever. The hand gripping his wrist, the forehead pressed against his neck, the breath blowing onto his chest—they were all burning hot. He had to slowly move his fingers, then wrist, then arm in sequence to gauge if his body was working properly, so he should have been struggling to control his body freely.

Jeong Taeui tried to shake off the brutal hand gripping his wrist several times, but it didn’t budge. For a moment, he thought all of Ilay’s strength was concentrated in that grip, but the body pressing down on him also didn’t move an inch, just like his hand.

“Ilay! —Hey!”

Jeong Taeui anxiously yelled but only laughter returned. The lips that had been moving at his ear crept down his cheek, seemingly touching his mouth, then savage canines bit his lip.

“Ow! —Hey, that hurts! Damn it, why are you suddenly in heat again, you guy who can’t even get gruel, where do you get all this strength… Hey, do it after you’re better, after you’re better!”

It seemed this damned guy was going to play his ‘territory game’ again. Jeong Taeui yelled several times but received no answer. Ilay, as if deaf, showed no reaction, only occasionally smirking as he trailed his hand over Jeong Taeui’s body. It was different from other times. Other times, he had been relaxed. It wasn’t that he seemed anxious now, but other times, he would smile, sometimes joke, and talk as he explored Jeong Taeui’s body. But now, he was silent, calmly caressing Jeong Taeui by himself. As if he wouldn’t listen to anything Jeong Taeui said.

“Hey, I said do it after you’re better. What are you doing, you guy who was dying without any energy, still burning with a fever? Do it after your fever goes down and you regain your strength. When have I ever refused…?”

It sounded a bit pathetic after he said it, but Jeong Taeui sighed and mumbled. When he thought about it, it was true. Ilay had occasionally straddled Jeong Taeui as if he suddenly remembered, but Jeong Taeui had never truly resisted. In fact, a big part of him felt that even if he did resist, it wouldn’t work on this guy, but on the other hand, when Ilay touched him, Jeong Taeui would naturally get into the mood himself. “Looking at it this way, my concept of chastity is quite weak,” Jeong Taeui briefly lamented inwardly, then once again tried to shake the hand that had him gripped.

Again, it didn’t budge.

A slight chill ran through his chest. It wasn’t a feeling of danger. He figured Ilay would just rub him a bit, finish, and then detach himself as usual, so it was just one more round of the ‘territory game’ they’d played several times already.

But this monstrous strength. It was unbelievable for someone who had just woken up after being in a coma for days. Even more unbelievable was that he was still suffering from a high fever. Moreover, Ilay was only using one hand to hold both of Jeong Taeui’s. Jeong Taeui himself thought he had at least the strength of a standard adult male, even if not exceptionally superior to others. Yet, he couldn’t resist with just one hand.

They say crazy people are strong, and it seems that’s true after all. There’s no such old saying, though.

“Hey, Ilay—”

“You won’t refuse?”

For the first time, Ilay answered Jeong Taeui. It was more a confirmation or a question than an answer, but Jeong Taeui frowned at the question, which was laced with a faint sneer.

“Have I ever avoided you when you came at me? No, I haven’t.”

“Hmm. Will you truly not refuse? …Even like this?”

He chuckled close to Jeong Taeui’s ear. Ilay’s hand pulled down Jeong Taeui’s pants. The pants, which were already precariously perched on his hips, slid down his thighs. This, however, made it harder to move, as his legs were now tangled in the fabric.

His groin was exposed. It should have felt cool meeting the air, but instead, it grew hotter. This was because Ilay’s body heat, pressing down directly from above, reached him. Without Jeong Taeui noticing when he’d removed them, Ilay’s lower body pressed against Jeong Taeui’s skin. The feeling of being hotter than usual wasn’t just his imagination. Ilay’s entire body felt like a fireball. The mouth that suddenly bit into Jeong Taeui’s chest and then licked it vigorously with his tongue, the hand that gripped Jeong Taeui’s hands, the other hand that pushed behind his knees to spread his thighs wide, and the penis that rubbed between them.

He really felt like he was going to get burned. Jeong Taeui was suddenly afraid. He wouldn’t literally get burned, but if it was this hot…

“Hey. Seriously, let’s do this later. You don’t know how hot you are right now, do you? You bastard, you’re not in your right mind… You’re already like a fireball, don’t you know your body will completely break down if your fever goes up even more?”

“Haha, you want to stop because of me…?”

“I said I wouldn’t push you away even later! You crazy bastard, think about your body!”

Jeong Taeui snapped, shouting angrily. But even after being cursed at, Ilay just let out a low chuckle—he really must not have been in his right mind. The flesh that had been rubbing against the tip between his legs also rose further.

“I just have a slight fever, but my mind is perfectly clear. I remember every detail of the dream I had while I was sleeping, it’s that vivid.”

Jeong Taeui grimaced at Ilay’s mumbling.

“A dream…? You’re doing this to me because you had a bad dream?”

“Hmm—something like that. I didn’t originally intend to go this far, but I got excited, and most of all, my lower half is aching. …But it’s inconvenient with one hand tied up.”

Ilay muttered to himself, then suddenly put more force into the hand that had been restraining Jeong Taeui’s wrist. He abruptly sat up, pulling the blanket that was sprawled next to him. Then, he bit one end of it and easily tore it.

Jeong Taeui watched with wide eyes, not knowing what he was doing. Before his very eyes, Ilay tore the blanket fabric into long strips, and with just one hand and his mouth, he effortlessly tied several layers, then began to bind Jeong Taeui’s hands with it.