Passion: Diaphonic Symphonia Novel - Chapter 83 - Bonus Track

When men gather, all sorts of things are discussed.

Jeong Taeui, who had been immersed in male society ever since his school days, thought that when it came to chattering, it was no less than women’s gossip. Among them, some of the more unsavory types would even blabber about how they finally slept with their new girlfriend for the first time yesterday, and whether her breasts were big or small.

During his cadet days, Jeong Taeui learned various things while listening to such stories—stories that inevitably came up in gatherings, even if he didn’t particularly want to hear them. The knowledge he could gain from them was diverse, ranging from useless information like techniques to get an innocent woman into bed, to useful and practical information like having to give up weekend leave and roll around if you got caught by a strict disciplinarian for running your mouth like that.

Just as most people associate primarily with those with whom they communicate well, Jeong Taeui was no different. He didn’t get particularly close to guys who constantly talked about women. Regardless of his likes or dislikes, it was simply uninteresting to him as it was a topic unrelated to himself. Thus, Jeong Taeui rarely discussed women with the comrades he usually got along with.

Then one day, something happened.

One of his close comrades returned from a weekend leave and had a perpetually relaxed expression on his face. He was smiling faintly, as if something very good had happened. They all twisted his arm to get the truth out of him, as he was reluctant to speak even when asked why he was like that. The truth wasn’t anything extraordinary.

He said he had spent a good time staying at his lover’s house, just like any other weekend. With that, his comrade clammed up again. However, if that was all, it wouldn’t have been any different from other times, and there would be no reason for such a relaxed expression. His comrades, concluding that he must have won a lottery worth hundreds of millions of won but was unwilling to share a single crumb with them, twisted his arm again. Another truth burst forth.

“Actually, until now, whenever I slept with my lover, it was just… so-so. I felt good in a normal way, but my lover didn’t seem to enjoy it much. Still, we just habitually got together and slept. Until that point, my comrade hesitated for a moment, then, pressured by the grim atmosphere of his comrades, he spat out the rest of his words.”

‘But the other day, I don’t know how things just clicked, but they got really excited. It wasn’t like that other times. Because of that, I naturally got more excited too, and so, more than usual… well, that’s what happened.’

His comrade said that, then scratched the bridge of his nose with an awkward smile.

“What, it really wasn’t the lottery?” another comrade asked suspiciously, pushing aside the one who had just spoken. Another comrade said, “Good job, you two, holding hands and visiting heaven together. So, did you get a good breakfast?”

“Yeah. They set out a table so full it looked like the legs would break.”

He was so pleased that the usually taciturn man, who rarely spoke, grinned and nodded. Behind him, like a halo, a man’s confidence shone brilliantly.

“That’s right, the elders often say that you can tell how satisfied a woman was last night by how the breakfast table is set,” the comrades exchanged words of unknown origin. Their hopes for a windfall lottery prize dashed, they soon lost interest, and the topic quickly shifted elsewhere.

Jeong Taeui thought of the beautiful young man he was dating and nodded, “Indeed, after a night of satisfying them with all my passion, they always seemed noticeably happier the next morning.” Although he envied the breakfast table he had never received, no matter how amazing and mind-blowing the night had been, he soon shook his head.

Jeong Taeui, who believed it was natural for people, whether women or men, to feel good when their physical desires were fully satisfied, was soon swept into a heated discussion on the subsequent topic: “Which is better for the Korean spirit on the breakfast table, doenjang-guk (soybean paste soup), or bugeo-guk (dried pollack soup), which is lighter on the stomach and refreshing to eat?” He had transitioned from the world of sexual desire to the world of appetite. Additionally, Jeong Taeui cast his vote for the light and easy bugeo-guk.

While watching a few Korean movies his uncle had sent him to alleviate his homesickness, the memory stemming from bugeo-guk went back several years.

Of course, for an empty stomach in the morning, clear bugeo-guk is better than doenjang-guk. Now that he thought about it, that comrade who enjoyed a lavish breakfast was a doenjang-guk person. He wondered if his lover still served him lavish breakfasts with doenjang-guk. Perhaps by now, she was his wife.

Such thoughts made him recall the taste of his hometown, which he hadn’t had in a long time, and he suddenly felt a craving. Jeong Taeui wasn’t picky about food, but sometimes he craved old tastes. Thinking he should visit a Korean restaurant later, he got up. The thought of food made him feel like he needed to wet his lips, even though he wasn’t particularly hungry.

When he went to the dining room, he asked Rita, who was just brewing tea, for cinnamon tea. This time, he thought of sujeonggwa (cinnamon punch). When his uncle had mentioned homesickness and offered to send Korean movies, Jeong Taeui had thought, “Homesickness? That’s random.” But once the thought arose, he did start to miss the food a bit. The fact that he was even thinking of sujeonggwa, which he didn’t particularly like, meant he must be very homesick.

“Good heavens, am I pregnant or something….”

Jeong Taeui muttered to himself without realizing it, then startled himself with his own words and flinched.

There are jokes that can be made and jokes that cannot. This was clearly the latter. The mere thought of it was terrifying in many ways.

Rubbing his arm, which had instantly broken out in goosebumps, Jeong Taeui grabbed two or three cans of beer from the refrigerator and turned back to his room. In any case, he suddenly felt like tasting something from his homeland, so he decided to eat out for dinner.

That meant he first had to tell Rita not to prepare his dinner, and also tell that guy…

“Pregnant? Oh, that’s joyous news. Did you go to the hospital for a diagnosis?”

Jeong Taeui, who had been walking lost in thought, suddenly stopped dead in his tracks, seeing a broad chest blocking his view.

He must have just come out of the shower, as drops of water that hadn’t been wiped off yet were trickling down his bare skin.

Jeong Taeui stepped back a couple of paces from the body he almost ran into and looked up. Ilay stood there, drying his short hair with a towel.

“You’re up already? Why didn’t you sleep more?”

Jeong Taeui said, stroking his pounding heart as if he had encountered a carnivorous beast while walking down the street. It had been about a week since he had seen Ilay’s face inside the house during the day, as Ilay had been away from home since last week and returned last night—or more precisely, at two in the morning today—looking like a dust-covered beggar.

“I was thinking of taking a shower and having a refreshing beer.”

“Beer?”

Jeong Taeui held out a can he had been holding in his arm. Ilay immediately took it and opened the pull tab right there. The sound of it going down his throat was refreshing.

Hmm… rather than Korean food for dinner far away, the beer nearby is more appealing…

Jeong Taeui also opened a can and took a few sips. It was cool.

“Ah, I was thinking of going for Korean food for dinner.”

“Korean food?”

“Yeah. I suddenly felt like having bugeo-guk.”

“Bugeo-guk? What’s that?”

“Ah—it’s like, dried pollack—. …It’s a thing.”

“Hmm? Fish soup? Fine. Let’s do that.”

Ilay nodded. Jeong Taeui also nodded in agreement and gulped down the rest of his beer.

Just then, Ilay, who had been gazing down at Jeong Taeui, suddenly brought up something unexpected.

“They say my mother suffered a lot during childbirth when I was born, because it was a difficult delivery.”

“…?”

Jeong Taeui, who was gulping down beer, tilted his head at the sudden remark. This guy sometimes jumps out of context.

Ilay, who had instantly emptied a can of beer, threw the empty can into the trash and continued, “If it’s my child you’re carrying, it means you might also have a hard time giving birth.”

“Pffft!!!”

He spat out his precious beer. And then he coughed for a long time. Until his abdominal muscles ached from cramping.

Ilay, who was drenched in beer by his own doing, quietly wiped his face with one hand. Then, looking down at Jeong Taeui askance, he smiled faintly.

“Don’t worry. I’ll work hard from now on to help you open up enough so that even a healthy baby can come out without much effort.”

“That…! A baby…!”

Jeong Taeui stammered, unsure whether to first shout that he needed no such help, or that there was no way he could be pregnant. Suddenly, Ilay lifted him up. And, carrying him like a sack of luggage on his shoulder, he turned towards his room.

“I was just about to come looking for you, Taei. I came back at dawn and you were asleep, and I hadn’t slept even ten hours in a week, so I just went to sleep. Now I’m feeling a bit more awake.”

“Th-that, wait, Il…”

“I’ve been stuck in the mountains for a week, so it’s all built up down there, heavy enough to hurt. If I release it lightly and work up a sweat before dinner, the timing will be perfect and the food will taste even better.”

“How many hours are you going to sweat for?!”

Jeong Taeui shouted, but Ilay’s steps lightly headed towards his room.

He had expected today to be a dangerous day.

Whenever this man returned after being away from home for more than a week, his lower half was always in a wild state.

Sometimes Jeong Taeui seriously pondered. He had heard in the past that a man’s libido gradually decreases after he leaves his passionate adolescence. Jeong Taeui was originally somewhat mild, but he had enjoyed physical relationships quite a bit when he was dating in Korea. So, when his body became such that he felt no discomfort even after not doing it for about a week, he thought it was due to age.

But the strange thing was that Ilay and Jeong Taeui were almost the same age. So, it was mathematically correct that as Jeong Taeui became milder, this man should also become milder.

But.

…But…!

Damn it, I should have taken care of it while he was asleep… Knowing it was a dangerous day, why was I so foolishly distracted by bugeo-guk?

Jeong Taeui blamed himself.

He was now accustomed to this awkward posture, lying with his legs spread and his lower back suspended in the air, staring at the ceiling. He was accustomed to the fact that he and this man constantly intertwined their bodies. He was even accustomed to living life here.

But what he still couldn’t get used to was…

Jeong Taeui, lying down, furtively cast his gaze downwards. Below Ilay’s body, who was pressing his lips to Jeong Taeui’s collarbone, leaving marks, he could see it.

He could see the thick mass of flesh, heavily nodding.

He had thought that after suffering in the mountains for a week, Ilay might have lost some weight, but instead, it seemed to have grown even larger, as if it had accumulated for a week.

He really should have taken care of it while Ilay was asleep…

Jeong Taeui swallowed his tears inwardly and regretted it.

“You seem to have the leisure to think about other things. Have you gotten used to it now?”

How did Ilay know Jeong Taeui was thinking about something else, like a ghost? He whispered, raising his head from below Jeong Taeui’s collarbone. He even seemed to be smiling slightly.

“No, I was just mentally preparing myself for the hardship to come…”

Jeong Taeui quickly mumbled an appropriate excuse.

No matter what, he couldn’t tell the truth.

He could never, even if his mouth were torn, say that whenever Ilay had been away from home for a long time and returned, Jeong Taeui would quietly sneak into his bed while he was asleep and relieve his urges with his hand once or twice.

Of course, he only succeeded perfectly about one out of five times; about four times, Ilay would wake up midway and he would suffer the consequences. But even if he just relieved it once with his hand, it was physically bearable.

At first, Ilay, waking up and looking very surprised, would ask, “What brings you here?” But as Jeong Taeui repeatedly mumbled, “Just haven’t seen you in a while, mumble mumble,” Ilay no longer asked these days. When he woke up like that, he would just chuckle with sleepy eyes and immediately climb on top of Jeong Taeui.

Once, Jeong Taeui felt a tiny, minuscule prick of conscience and subtly asked, “Doesn’t it bother you if I just touch your thing while you’re asleep?” He shook his head without a word.

“You rarely want to do it first, so in those times, it’s actually good. I like honest people when it comes to physical desires, Taei. Whenever you feel like it, come over even if I’m asleep. …I’ll gladly cooperate to help you like sex more and more.”

Ilay’s expression when he said that seemed quite pleased.

There seemed to be a slight misunderstanding, but Jeong Taeui said nothing, thinking it would be better to just leave it at that.

He should have done that today too, but Jeong Taeui, distracted by bugeo-guk and putting himself in danger, steeled his resolve.

As Jeong Taeui took a deep breath, Ilay suddenly raised his head. He looked down at Jeong Taeui, then smiled with a subtly furrowed brow.

“Is it still that difficult?”

“Hmm… I can’t say it’s not difficult… It’s bearable.”

Jeong Taeui hesitated for a moment, then spoke honestly. A premonition of disaster flashed through his mind if he didn’t speak honestly.

In truth, it was difficult.

At least, in the past, if it was too aggressive, there were times when he had to seriously consider whether or not to go to the hospital the next day, but that wasn’t the case these days. Even after a difficult time that made him think he might need to go to the hospital tomorrow, he was still more or less fine.

However, that literally meant ‘he had gotten used to it enough not to need hospital care,’ not ‘he had gotten used to it enough to face it with a calm mind.’

“Tsk, how much more do I have to do for you to get used to it? …Aren’t you a bit too slow to adapt?”

Jeong Taeui glared fiercely at Ilay, who, in a classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, clicked his tongue.

“I think my adaptability is excellent, considering there’s no bleeding when you shove that in!”

“But if you think about it, you’ve never truly felt pleasure from penetration.”

“Well… I don’t dislike the act itself, so that’s fine, isn’t it?”

Jeong Taeui mumbled, shrugging his shoulders.

Fortunately, Ilay Ligrow, at least, retained a modicum of manners. Even when Jeong Taeui’s lower body was overwhelmed, turning pale and dripping with cold sweat, he didn’t just enjoy himself and finish alone. He persistently stimulated Jeong Taeui’s front until he, too, reached climax.

Moreover, although his lower body felt like it was tearing in two, the direct warmth of the naked body felt good.

So, even though he had to mentally prepare for the daunting future, he didn’t dislike the overall act.

After all, he also climaxed when this man stimulated his front during the act, so his desires weren’t completely unfulfilled.

“Hmm… well, anyway, good. Shall we get serious now?”

Ilay, who had been fondling Jeong Taeui’s chest, said.

Hearing those words, Jeong Taeui steeled himself for battle.

It truly was a war.

Even though he had loosened his lower part enough, the sheer volume was still overwhelming. It felt like his insides were packed full and then some, swelling up.

The act was more intense than usual. After friction so hot it was unbearable, Ilay finally climaxed only when Jeong Taeui was truly on the verge of completely losing consciousness and fainting.

However, being on the verge of fainting meant he had already fainted briefly several times for a few seconds, and Jeong Taeui lay sprawled on the bed like a corpse, thinking there could never be a more intense workout in the world.

He had no sensation in his lower body. He wondered if this time, after a long while, he might have to worry about whether or not to go to the hospital. He felt like he should check for bleeding by fumbling below, but he couldn’t move a single finger.

In fact, his head was hazy. It felt like he had pulled an all-nighter for three days and then chugged a gallon of alcohol. His thoughts weren’t functioning properly, as if he were wandering in a dream.

He lost consciousness for a moment, then opened his eyes to find Ilay lying on top of him, who was lying face down. He was incredibly heavy, but even that sensation was too difficult for his mind to process; his head was a mess.

“Feeling better after one round. …It’s troubling if you’re already out cold.”

The heavy mass of muscle lying on his back mumbled.

If you’re going to do more, just kill me… Jeong Taeui vaguely thought that with his hazy mind.

To Jeong Taeui, that voice continued, as if coming from a dream.

“Why didn’t you come this morning? I thought you’d be itching for it, since it’s been a week and you must have built up quite a bit too.”

“I know… I should have gone, I’m such an idiot for not going…”

If he had known it would be this intense, draining all his energy, he would have gone no matter what.

“Hmm…? It sounds like you felt obligated to come.”

Jeong Taeui listened to the voice, which was tinged with laughter, in a daze, and then, overcome by profound fatigue, he sobbed sadly a couple of times in a small voice before sighing.

It felt as if all the blood had drained from his head. Perhaps the blood had all gone to his hands and feet, as his hands and feet were heavy as lead and he couldn’t move them. With no blood circulating, his brain wasn’t working either.

So, Jeong Taeui blurted out something inappropriate without even knowing what he was saying.

“I should have taken care of it two or three times with my hand beforehand… then I wouldn’t have suffered so much physically…”

After saying that, he whimpered and sniffled again, then dozed off.

He must have lost consciousness and fallen asleep for only a few seconds, but when he faintly regained awareness, it was somehow quiet. He could clearly feel the heavy weight on his back, but Ilay wasn’t saying anything.

Did this guy fall asleep too…? He’s heavy…

He groaned and tried to move his body, but his head was still hazy, his body was heavy, and the weight on him was immense.

It was frustrating, but he decided he would just have to sleep while being pinned down. Just as Jeong Taeui was about to lose consciousness again with his muddled mind, he heard it.

“…Aha… So, that’s why, whenever I was away from home for a while and came back, you’d always sneak into my bed when I was asleep and touch my thing…?”

A low, dangerous voice reached his ears as if from the depths of hell.

At that moment, Jeong Taeui suddenly snapped wide awake as if doused with cold water. The weariness that had clouded his thoughts vanished in an instant.

Perhaps he had a good intuition, but Jeong Taeui, whose survival instincts were thoroughly honed, could feel that something very bad was happening to him.

“Wait… Ilay, what did I just say?”

He felt like he had said something he shouldn’t have, but he couldn’t quickly recall what it was.

Jeong Taeui blinked with a clear mind and asked cautiously.

However, there was no answer to his question. Instead, only a cold, laughing murmur returned.

“And I thought you were happy to see me after a long time and wanted to enjoy yourself with me, even if it was physically taxing…”

“Uh… huh?”

Jeong Taeui, still pinned down by the heavy body and unable to move, widened his eyes and asked back, his pupils rolling uneasily.

“Too bad, Taei, you couldn’t take care of it beforehand today. Thanks to that, I still have plenty of strength left down below. It doesn’t seem like it’ll wither after just a few times. …Then, let’s go slowly again.”

“Uh…?”

Jeong Taeui, answering clumsily, realized the very next moment.

The war hadn’t even begun.

“Argh… ah, …ah, ah, ah, ….”

His voice was hoarse, and he couldn’t even properly groan.

His lower body was throbbing. From the continuous in-and-out motion of the flesh, the entrance must have swollen up.

His exhausted and weary mind was already half-gone again. But unfortunately, the other half had to be vividly pulled back to reality by the man lying on top of him.

“Relax your lower body, Taei. I’m about to put it in.”

Ilay, who said this, was already putting it in.

‘Put what in? It’s already all the way in, how can you put more in?’ That thought reached his throat, but his mouth was so dry he couldn’t speak, and then he suddenly gasped for breath.

Something was forcing its way into his lower part.

Into that place, which was already completely filled by Ilay’s terrifying object, making him think it would surely tear if he swelled even a little more, something was forcing its way through the perfectly fitted gap.

“Wha… what… is…”

Jeong Taeui gasped, barely managing to stammer, but Ilay didn’t answer. Instead, he slightly moved what he had forced in, creating space between his horrifying member, which was already tightly filling all his insides, and the inner wall.

Ah, it was a finger.

The moment he realized that fact in a situation where he felt like he was about to faint, Jeong Taeui burst into tears.

“You damn bastard… just putting your thing in makes me feel like I’m going back and forth to the afterlife, but you, you even put your finger… you wicked…”

He couldn’t bear not to curse, even if his lower body tore and he gasped for breath. Jeong Taeui cursed with especially clear pronunciation, crying profusely.

“Relax! …It’s not torn. Though it looks precarious. Where… good, keep relaxing, just like that.”

This was a complete role reversal.

Ilay, who had sternly told him to relax, seemed not to care whether Jeong Taeui gasped for breath from the immense pressure. He cautiously moved his hand. The finger that had forced its way into the entrance carefully traced the inner wall.

‘I’m definitely going to die today,’ or ‘at least a hospital visit is confirmed,’ he thought. As he barely managed short breaths under the suffocating pressure, Ilay’s low voice reached Jeong Taeui’s ears.

“All this time, Taei, I was actually frustrated with you. With your body. It was too narrow. It tightened strongly because of that, but it was too narrow for me to enjoy myself to the fullest. And I didn’t want to just thrust wildly, regardless of whether your bottom tore or your insides got damaged, like I did with other people. …Besides, it seemed like you were starting to like having sex with me more and more, to the point of bothering my thing even when I was asleep, so I thought I’d endure it for a while.”

“…—.”

“If you did it for your own comfort, then I also thought I should seek some comfort for my body and start by widening what’s excessively narrow.”

Jeong Taeui cried. His body and soul cried profusely.

He blamed himself the most for his slip of the tongue, then he blamed this man who tormented his body so much, even if Jeong Taeui had secretly snuck into his bed with ill intentions, and finally, he blamed that inhuman mass of flesh that was tightly widening and digging into his lower body.

Carefully, so as not to tear or injure his lower body, Ilay moved his hand. He slightly parted the space between his member and the inner wall, which were tightly pressed together inside his body, creating room. Even so, it would close tightly again once the finger passed.

There was no pain from bleeding. But he couldn’t breathe well due to the pressure that pounded his body, which was stretched open so wide it wouldn’t be strange if it tore at any moment. It felt like his belly was being crammed full of flesh.

And amidst that, the sensation of his body opening up.