Passion: Diaphonic Symphonia Novel - Chapter 37

“But that guy, he’s just… lost. Thinking about him makes me feel pity and regret, but with that personality, it’s hard for him to be happy. …Or, even if he finds happiness, the form of that happiness would be quite different from what’s generally conceived.”

Johan shrugged. As if there was nothing he could do, and it had nothing to do with him.

Just then, quickly spotting the dessert being brought on a tray by a server in the distance, his eyes lit up, and he nonchalantly concluded,

“In any case, it’s not a problem anyone else can bear. …Is that mille-feuille? Crème brûlée? It would be nice if it were something refreshing like a sorbet.”

Jeong Taeui gazed blankly at Johan, whose interest had completely shifted in his mind.

He wasn’t wrong. Jeong Taeui didn’t want it to be true, but the statement itself made sense to him.

He quietly sighed. Even Johan’s final remark was not wrong. Life, from the beginning, is not a problem someone else can bear.

Somehow, a bitter taste filled his mouth, and Jeong Taeui scratched his head vigorously.

It was then.

Suddenly, he felt a sting around his forehead and turned his head slightly to see Ilay watching him. He seemed to have finished his meal too.

He met his gaze, not knowing how long he had been watching him.

“…”

Jeong Taeui looked at him quizzically. A gaze flew from behind his glasses. He stared back intently, feeling it would be strange to avoid his eyes. It was a few seconds after their eyes met that he realized it was more unusual for them to be staring at each other like this amidst other people, but by then, a staring contest had already begun.

It was when he was wide-eyed, staring at him on the borderline between glaring and watching.

“By the way, you are… let’s see… yes. I heard Christoph’s friend was staying, so you must be that young man.”

He felt all eyes suddenly turn to him and turned around, asking, “Huh?” People were looking at Jeong Taeui with strange expressions.

“Oh? …Huh?”

After blinking a few times and looking around, he finally realized that the Elder had spoken to him as well.

He hastily turned his head and, trying to sound polite, said, “Ah, yes.” He quickly forced a smile. But it was already too late.

The Elder smiled kindly and asked,

“So, it seems you have something to say to Rick, judging by how you’re looking at him.”

“Huh? Oh, well…”

Jeong Taeui was startled and looked between the Elder and Ilay, sweating profusely. Anyone seeing this would think he had been caught secretly staring at Ilay.

“Rick was looking at me…”

As Jeong Taeui stammered, Ilay raised an eyebrow. He widened his eyes as if saying, ‘Me?’ then let out a small laugh. His expression was like, ‘I didn’t, but if you say so, I’ll just keep quiet.’ It was an expression everyone could read.

‘No, I really…’ Jeong Taeui mumbled, then closed his mouth. It was something that would make him pound his chest in frustration, but it was obvious it would only backfire.

Jeong Taeui changed his mind.

He adopted a very serious and earnest expression, slowly looked at the Elder and Ilay, and said,

“It’s something I’ve always thought, but today, he was especially sophisticated and cool, and I was so captivated by his politeness and sincerity in bringing the Elder that I couldn’t help but stare. I’m just a temporary visitor to this house… so I wanted to cherish this sight of him, wondering when I would see such a side of him again.”

Only the first three words were a lie. The rest was pure truth. The meaning of the words, that is.

When would he ever see this guy disguised as such a polite, well-mannered, and intelligent young man again? It would be a waste not to observe him closely now.

No sooner had he finished speaking than Jeong Taeui stared intently at Ilay again. Wide-eyed.

Silence fell for a moment. Ilay stared silently at Jeong Taeui, and Jeong Taeui stared back. People’s gazes shifted between them.

The silence was broken by the Elder’s laughter.

“Haha, indeed. Riegrow is a young man who draws a lot of attention. You have a good eye.”

At the benevolent laughter of the Elder, Jeong Taeui briefly felt like explaining, ‘That’s not it,’ but decided to just keep quiet.

Next to the Elder, Ilay looked at Jeong Taeui for a moment longer, then slightly turned his head, a faint smile on his lips, and said to the Elder,

“Since you’ve given such undue praise, I’d like to meet him separately later to greet him again.”

Only the Elder laughed and said, ‘Of course,’ while the others remained silent. None of them failed to interpret his words as, ‘You’re going to pay for this later.’ Not even Jeong Taeui.

Damn it, why do I always dig my own grave?

As Jeong Taeui, his face pale, bowed his head deeply, the Elder’s question shifted to the next person.

Jeong Taeui resolved that if Ilay ever brought up those words later, he would insist they were purely complimentary, and then he spooned up the lemon sorbet that came as dessert—it seemed Johan was blessed with good food luck.

Jeong Taeui, like an angry person, quickly finished the sorbet in a few spoonfuls, then furtively glared at Ilay. This time, carefully, so as not to engage in an open staring contest.

Ilay, too, had his head turned towards the young man who was now receiving the Elder’s question, but his eyes were fixed on Jeong Taeui. His arm was resting on the armrest, and his chin and mouth were supported by his interlocked fingers, so it wasn’t clearly visible, but somehow, his eyes seemed to be smiling.

Suddenly, something hot surged within him, and Jeong Taeui snatched the dessert bowl from Johan, who was happily savoring his dessert next to him, and swallowed a mouthful of the cold sorbet. Johan wailed beside him, but Jeong Taeui pretended not to hear. He figured this guy would just call a server to get another bowl anyway.

His face needlessly flushed.

The hint of a smile in that narrow, squinting gaze was somehow awkward. So he didn’t look that way again.

Meanwhile, the Elder eventually seemed to have spoken to every young man seated at the table. He turned his gaze to Christoph, who was the last.

“So, Chris. How have you been doing?”

When the Elder asked, Christoph finally lifted his gaze slightly to meet his eyes. His face, looking at the Elder with clear eyes, was startled, as if he hadn’t expected to be spoken to.

However, as soon as he saw the Elder’s gentle smile, Christoph lowered his gaze again.

“Thanks to the Elder, I’m doing well.”

His voice was slightly lower and calmer than usual.

Jeong Taeui watched Christoph, who was bowing his head and listening to the Elder’s voice. Right now, he was a beautiful and innocent young man.

“If he were always like that, who would call him crazy? It would be so much better if he kept being like this.”

As Jeong Taeui mumbled to himself, Johan, who had indeed received a new sorbet from the server, mumbled next to him,

“Wrong, wrong. The perception of a person, once it’s set, that’s it. Do you know why the word ‘label’ is so scary?”

He pinched Johan’s back, who was spitefully saying that once someone gets on your bad side, everything they do looks bad.

“I heard you’ve left the T&R mobile unit now, so what have you been doing these days?”

The Elder asked, carefully observing Christoph’s face. As with everyone else, his face revealed unmistakable affection for his nephew.

It was an affection that was fair to everyone. From the grandson whom people called the most outstanding, to the grandson whom people feared and loathed, he gave equal love.

“I’m currently… taking a break.”

Christoph replied hesitantly. The Elder nodded, saying, ‘I see.’

The meal was almost over. In terms of food, it was already finished. However, the Elder’s conversation with them continued, keeping the dining session going.

It seemed it was time to wrap up the evening as the Elder asked for his cane, which was leaning against a pillar. Watching Christoph quickly get up and bring him the cane, Jeong Taeui also rose from his seat.

Now, the day’s tasks were done. He could go to his room and sleep, read, or rest. Or perhaps watch a movie or something, Jeong Taeui thought as he began to walk.

In the bustling, dispersing atmosphere as others also rose one by one, Jeong Taeui furtively glanced at Christoph, who was standing politely next to the Elder like a good boy. He let out a small chuckle.

It was then. The Elder, leaning on his cane and turning to leave the dining hall, suddenly looked intently at Christoph. Christoph looked at the Elder quizzically, but as their eyes met, he soon awkwardly averted his gaze.

The Elder spoke in a somewhat quiet voice,

“By the way, your mother said she wanted to come for the succession. I told her to do so.”

At that moment.

Crunch.

Jeong Taeui felt as if something had shattered.

That sound came from Christoph’s eyes.

His wide, cold eyes, frozen in an instant, were shattering like ice, piece by piece, on his pale, white face.

Maybe I should take a walk through the forest tonight.

Jeong Taeui looked down at the distant forest and thought.

The forest, which embraced the back of the mansion and connected with the grand mountain range, grew denser the deeper one went, but for a certain distance into it, the paths were well-maintained.

Along with ample walking trails, there was also a horse riding course, which Christoph often used to ride horses.

Jeong Taeui also occasionally strolled there in the evenings when he had time.

Perhaps because it was mostly used as a horse-riding course, Jeong Taeui had never once encountered anyone else on the walking paths. Only the sound of horses galloping in the distance could occasionally be heard.

“Right, tonight I should take a forest bath for a change. It’ll relieve some of my physical and mental fatigue.”

Jeong Taeui mumbled, feeling sorry for his unknowingly exhausted mind and body since coming here.

That forest was truly magnificent. Oak trees and other rare species in Germany filled the inner parts of the forest, making it spacious yet dense. Lying under the trees and looking up at the leaves covering the sky, that alone was enough to forget everything.

A birch forest continued behind his house in Berlin, but this oak forest was even denser and more secluded.

“It’s rare to see such a splendid forest privately owned. I can understand why that guy doesn’t come back for ages once he goes to the forest.”

Jeong Taeui mumbled, looking down at the forest entrance, which was only a few minutes’ walk from the mansion.

Christoph was in the forest even now. Several hours had passed, but he still hadn’t returned.

…And just a moment ago, Jeong Taeui had finished cleaning his blood-soaked study and was just now coming out for a breather.

Christoph was unstable. He had always had an unpredictable, precarious side to him, but it had increased noticeably in the past few days.

Even today, usually, it wouldn’t have escalated to such an extent.

While Christoph was briefly away, a servant came from the main building with a message. It seemed to be an urgent reply, as the servant, finding Christoph not in his room, left a memo with the message on his desk. As he did so, he must have searched Christoph’s drawer for a writing implement to quickly jot down a reply.

It was precisely then that Christoph returned.

He had been complaining of a headache and ringing in his ears since morning, pacing restlessly in his room. He had eventually gone to the main building to get stronger painkillers than what he had, and was just returning.

Jeong Taeui had followed him, fearing he might chew more than the allowed dose as soon as he received the medicine—that had happened once before.

This time too, seeing the amount of medicine, several times more than needed, he frowned and said, ‘I’ll hold onto it, just ask me whenever you need some.’ But Christoph didn’t seem to hear him. Jeong Taeui decided to keep quiet, fearing it would be dangerous to provoke him further since he had been in a bad mood since waking up, perhaps from a bad dream. He thought he would try to somehow pilfer the medicine later when Christoph was in a better mood.

It was at that moment.

As soon as he returned to West Wing, Christoph, unable to wait even until he reached his room, his face pale, popped several pills into his mouth and chewed them, heading for the study. He found the door open.

Jeong Taeui, following a few steps behind, also noticed the open door when Christoph briefly slowed his pace.

Christoph quickened his steps, which had seemed to pause for a moment. With a blank expression, he vigorously pushed open the half-open study door.

Bang! The sudden opening of the door startled the servant inside, who spun around. He was rummaging through a drawer.

‘Ah… you’re back. I was just going to leave a memo and return, and though I knew it was rude, I was just looking for a writing implement…’

The servant’s flustered, explanatory words remained unfinished.

‘Why did you enter without permission?’

Christoph said in a low voice. His gaze, fixed on the servant, was coldly frozen.

The servant was terrified. He foolishly seemed to have just remembered who Christoph was.

‘An urgent… an urgent message, so I was just going to deliver—’

‘Did I say anyone could enter my room?’

‘S-sorry. I was just delivering the message—. Ah, that, that message was sent by Christoph-nim’s great-uncle—’

The servant’s face crumpled, and he tried to quickly change the subject. But his words seemed to go unheard.

Jeong Taeui clicked his tongue, and before he could even say anything, Christoph approached him.

Without saying or listening to another word, he strode towards the desk where the servant stood trembling, and on the way, grabbed whatever came to hand from a display case.

It was a porcelain figurine. A mother and child statue, about knee-high.

There was no time to stop him.

Christoph, approaching the servant who stood frozen, pale and wide-eyed with fear, struck him down without batting an eyelid.

Thwack! With a grating sound, the porcelain figurine shattered. The elegant mother holding her baby, the baby, the body, the arms and legs, lost their form and scattered into countless pieces. All bloody.

The servant screamed, clutching his head and crouching on the spot. Bright red blood streamed down between his fingers.

Christoph looked down at him coldly. Not stopping there, he continued to strike the servant with the remaining half of the porcelain figurine, which was now reduced to the size of a large glass, again and again. Until the servant was bloody and screamed himself hoarse.

Jeong Taeui’s face hardened, and he rushed towards him. He grabbed Christoph’s arm and violently pulled it away.

‘Stop it, Chris!’

‘I told you not to touch me.’

Christoph said coldly. This was not the rare, bizarre tremor and unfocused, bluish gaze. He was perfectly rational as usual—with a slightly cooler and calmer mind than usual—looking at them.

He raised his hand. He then threw the remaining porcelain fragment, now reduced to the size of a large glass, at Jeong Taeui. Hard.

The porcelain, flying precisely through the spot where Jeong Taeui’s head had been as he flinched and dodged, shattered against the wall behind him.

No more porcelain figurines remained. Only bloody fragments were scattered everywhere.

Jeong Taeui, who would undoubtedly have been severely injured if he had been hit, looked down at the shattered pieces behind him with a hardened face, then looked back at Christoph. At that moment, he frowned and shouted,

‘Chris! Your hand!’

Christoph’s hand was horribly torn. It was understandable, having gripped and swung the broken porcelain multiple times, but his expression was so calm that Jeong Taeui hadn’t realized it.

‘Damn it, who hurts others while hurting themselves, you idiot!’

Jeong Taeui clicked his tongue and approached him.

Christoph didn’t answer, but stared blankly at Jeong Taeui. With a strange look in his eyes.

However, when Jeong Taeui asked to see his hand, he simply turned and walked out of the study.

Jeong Taeui started to chase after him, but then saw the bloody servant crouching and groaning behind him, and went to him instead.

In the end, Christoph didn’t return until a call was made for the servant and a car was arranged to take him to the hospital.

Jeong Taeui, standing bewildered in front of the study, which was splattered with blood and littered with broken ceramic pieces, heard casually that Christoph had gone horseback riding into the forest and then unleashed a torrent of curses at the empty room, aimed at its owner.

‘He leaves someone in that state and goes horseback riding leisurely?! Oh my god, you crazy bastard. Look at the state of this room. Doesn’t he think his own blood isn’t mixed in here?!’

And so, after showering the empty room with every curse he could think of, he grumbled, ‘I wonder if he even treated his hand,’ and began cleaning the study.

It took quite a while to meticulously clean the entire room, searching for fragments that might have scattered into unseen corners.

After cleaning, he put a band-aid on a finger that had been slightly scratched by a fragment, and clicked his tongue at the bloodstains on his pants’ knees from wiping the bloody floor. Once the room was clean, he felt truly physically and mentally exhausted.

He desperately craved a cigarette, something he had almost completely given up during his stay in Berlin.

Recalling the mansion’s grandeur, too far from the main gate to easily go buy cigarettes, Jeong Taeui thought for a moment and then went to find Johan. He didn’t know if Johan smoked, but if not, he surely knew more people than Jeong Taeui, so he intended to badger him into getting just one cigarette from somewhere.

Johan, startled for a moment upon seeing Jeong Taeui appear in blood-stained pants, claimed he didn’t smoke much but might have some left from an old friend. He then rummaged through drawers, desks, and even inside the closet for a long time before finally pulling out a pack. It was almost new, with only one cigarette missing.

His mind was agitated, and he wanted to chain-smoke. Looking for a suitable place to smoke one cigarette after another, Jeong Taeui arrived at the spot where he now stood. A place with a good view and a pleasant breeze, overlooking the distant forest.

It was a simple resting area on the very top floor of the temporary tower connecting the West Wing and the Main Building, with a small sky garden.

Originally, the Main Building, East Wing, and West Wing were planned to be built as a single structure, but due to issues with building structure and function, they were built separately. Instead, this temporary tower was constructed as a connecting structure to allow easy access between the buildings on each floor.

The temporary tower between the East Wing and the Main Building was said to be symmetrical in structure to this one.

The function of the temporary tower was solely to connect the Main Building and the East/West Wings, so all the floors below this rooftop were composed entirely of corridors. The rooftop was designed as a small artificial garden, perfect for looking out into the distance, enjoying the breeze, and taking a breather.