March Novel (Completed) - Chapter 56

Sehwa had been circling the parking lot for an hour. There wasn’t really anywhere to walk near the house. Suspicious shadows appeared and disappeared beyond the sparsely parked cars. These were the tails Gi Taejeong had left behind. When he went outside, there was no sign of them at all, but when he was inside the house like this, they didn’t hide the fact that they were watching him. It was a sinister intention. Thanks to it, Sehwa couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was watching him even when he was outside. Conversely, when he was in the house, they made him aware that he wasn’t alone even when he was by himself. …He was constantly conscious of Gi Taejeong, anytime, anywhere.

“…What is this?”

A childish whine involuntarily burst out. Sehwa stood still and stared intently at his new shoes, which hadn’t been broken in yet.

He had been allowed short outings for a few days now. Of course, with the patch wrapped around his dick. The silver lining was that the restraint wasn’t as severe as when it was first tied. It was just wrapped once around the base of his dick, so it didn’t hurt at all, and going to the bathroom was no problem.

The perineum was no longer stamped. Gi Taejeong, surprisingly, was agonizing over this issue every morning. He liked that the mark remained so much it felt like his dick would burst, but he didn’t like that it turned blue. Previously, Gi Taejeong had repeatedly questioned why the color of his crotch was so light, and afterwards, he would habitually suck greedily on Sehwa’s lower parts. So, he just assumed that was Gi Taejeong’s preference. He must be disgusted because the color he liked so much was ruined, right?

‘The color will fade over time anyway. That’s not what’s bothering me right now, baby.’

However, Gi Taejeong shook his head seriously, denying Sehwa’s misunderstanding. He said he didn’t dislike the perineum itself, which was stained and blotchy from the ink bleeding.

‘This is outside my command.’

‘But… what can I do? Even if you write on your hand, it lasts a day…’

‘That ‘unavoidable situation’ is disgusting, you know?’

He said that the faint bluish mark that remained, no matter how cleanly it was wiped, was neither intended by him nor an anticipated situation. Gi Taejeong seemed to intensely dislike anything that happened outside his control. Even if it was just an ink stain from a stamp.

‘Maybe a tattoo would be better.’

He even said something like that this morning while tying the patch. When Sehwa froze with his legs spread, he chuckled softly and dismissed it as a joke… but it probably wasn’t just idle talk. He was a man who would certainly go through with something if he wanted to, regardless of Sehwa’s will.

Sehwa gasped for breath, hands on his knees. Suddenly, his breath caught in his throat.

What… am I? What am I to that man?

The first day he was officially allowed out was good. Although he couldn’t go far because he had to return before two hours passed, getting some fresh air definitely made him less sleepy. However, as the time spent outside accumulated, various thoughts flooded in. Especially about Gi Taejeong.

The stream of water falling from the ceiling, the sensation of leaning against his broad, firm chest, his low voice softly whispering in his ear. And the top of his foot supporting his own feet. When he was alone, the events of that day would replay endlessly, and the black screen in his retina would rewind everything from his first meeting with Gi Taejeong until now.

That day, when they had a deeper, more intense relationship than usual, Gi Taejeong told him he had worked hard. He had never praised him even when he smuggled drugs out of the shelter, but he received praise for the first time only after satisfying his sexual desires. Moreover, it was the first time he had heard such a soft and gentle tone from him.

It was clearly a good thing. He should feel relieved that he was no longer treating him harshly… but the moment he heard him say he had worked hard, a part of his heart seemed to crumble. For Gi Taejeong, shooting out lewd fluids and taking his large dick all the way in… that must have been the only thing worth praising. It seemed that was the only thing he thought he did well. He had found the double-card pattern when he went to raid the shelter, and he had transferred the drugs well. He had clung to the bomb casing until the very end, even while crying his eyes out… All those things were worth less than a single act of sex.

A hollow wind blew through the cracks in his shattered heart. Now Gi Taejeong no longer kicked him. After treating him harshly in the bunker, he had even taken him out to soothe him and grilled meat for him himself. Since the day he submissively responded to his kiss, Gi Taejeong no longer did things Sehwa terribly disliked, such as sneering at him by name or calling him a male whore.

His attitude couldn’t be described as merely treating him as a decoy for an operation. Nor did it seem like he was treating him as someone to be used a few times and then discarded. Sehwa also felt it. That he had definitely become a different person to Gi Taejeong than before. But… could that really be considered a good thing?

“…What is this if not a fucktoy…”

He had deluded himself into thinking it was much better than being beaten and only hearing the sounds of his hole, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized it wasn’t. Only the words used to describe it had changed, but the treatment seemed to have gotten worse.

Sehwa unknowingly clutched his chest, thumping it. The words “you worked hard,” that low, refined voice, kept weighing on his heart, making his eyes sting with tears.

Ever since he got entangled with Gi Taejeong, every day had been filled with tears, but lately, it seemed to have gotten worse. His mood fluctuated constantly, to the point where even he was flustered. Was it because he had never had this much time to idly lose himself in thought before?

“…Why am I like this, really.”

He wished he would just forbid him from going out again. He forced himself to go outside every time, fearing he would find fault if he stayed in the office… but when he was alone like this, seeing other people working and living normally… his feelings kept getting strange. It felt like there was something wrong with him, who now naturally accepted Gi Taejeong’s embrace without even mentioning bets. He thought it was better when he was confined and slept on a waterbed, when he could make excuses that none of this was his will.

“Get a grip, get a grip…”

His own voice, muttering, felt unfamiliar. So much had changed. Quickly resigning himself and finding a way to survive had been one of his strengths, but now even that wasn’t working well. A lump kept forming deep inside him. He knew it was because of Gi Taejeong, but everything else felt numb.

Sehwa didn’t know how to describe these feelings. More accurately, he was avoiding it because he didn’t want to. If he were to extract accurate sentences from the completely crushed mass. If he were to realize feelings he didn’t want to know. He felt like he would collapse completely and never be able to get up again…

“…Stop thinking about it.”

There was nothing he could do anyway. Sehwa slapped his cheeks a few times. He mocked himself and then encouraged himself, dragging his heavy steps.

Today, he had taken all his important belongings from the lodging. Gi Taejeong said he would be moving to the official residence in the afternoon, as he had some work. Of course, he would only stay there for a few days and then return, but Gi Taejeong had stated that Sehwa would never return to that small room again afterwards.

‘You won’t have to go outside the office anyway when you’re with me, and after all the work is done, you’ll get a new identity and live inside the city, won’t you?’

He told him not to cry after having everything stolen because he had stashed things in a place with no security whatsoever, and to bring all his personal belongings now. He didn’t entirely believe his words about giving him a new new identity, but it wasn’t a difficult order to follow. The only things he had hidden in his lodging were a drug distribution lineage and a small amount of cash.

“Oh? Aren’t you March Boy?”

Someone at the parking lot entrance waved his hand, recognizing him. It was the fence auntie.

“Wow… look at you, so handsome. Why didn’t you dress like this before? Why did you always look like a beggar?”

“Have you been well?”

He suppressed his noisy thoughts and tried to ask kindly, and the fence auntie shivered, saying, “Don’t even talk about it.”

“Do you know that all the odd-jobbers here died recently? Mr. Kim and Mr. Choi, who used to clean the Hwatu game, is gone too, they say.”

“What? Why?”

“That’s what everyone’s going crazy about, because they don’t know. The new director seems to be killing people like chickens.”

Mr. Kim and Mr. Choi, the cleaners… they were quite seasoned odd-jobbers inside the house. They were also people who occasionally looked out for Sehwa. Knowing that he often starved to avoid increasing his debt, they would always share food when they had some. They even introduced customers to him. Of course, it didn’t make much money. Honestly, it was a loss. But he didn’t show it, fearing they wouldn’t talk to him again if he refused. He knew it wasn’t genuine kindness. But since no one else had ever looked out for him that much, even their capricious generosity was welcome.

Normally, when working here, people would disappear without a word the very next day. Death wasn’t unfamiliar or sad, but… knowing that Gi Taejeong was the one who killed those men, it felt a bit strange. Did he know that those men had looked out for him? He probably did… Gi Taejeong knew everything about him. That man seemed intent on destroying everything of his, leaving not a single speck.

“That’s why we couldn’t do proper business until yesterday, the smell of bleach was everywhere. They never cleaned that hard even when the cops showed up, so how much blood must have been spilled inside?”

The fence auntie pretended to gag, saying he still felt nauseous.

“Ah…”

Could it be… then? The day he told him he had worked hard.

That day, Sergeant Major Choi suddenly spoke to him and said his superior was feeling down. When he went inside, Gi Taejeong was sprawled on the sofa with liquor bottles lined up on the table. He had felt the smell of bleach was stronger than usual even on his way up to the office.

But Gi Taejeong… he was a man who wouldn’t bat an eye at making his own subordinates half-crippled. Such a man, feeling down because he killed some house odd-jobbers he had never even met? That didn’t make sense.

“Oh, since I met you, can you take a look at this?”

As if to awaken Sehwa from his thoughts, the fence auntie held out a few pills.

“They say this is a new product mixed with Kepo and Dina… but you can’t trust those 3-won guys. Their main business went bankrupt, and they’re reckless these days, aren’t they?”

“Ah… it’s a bit difficult here since people can see. Just give it to me for now. I’ll let you know when I come back in a few days after running an errand.”

He couldn’t help it. He had the patch on, so he couldn’t taste it right away, and he would be staying at Gi Taejeong’s official residence for a while, so it would be hard to meet. The fence auntie scratched his cheek awkwardly, then put the pills in Sehwa’s hand.

“Well, you’re not one to spread rumors.”

“Yes. I’ll see you here in a week. I’ll be out around this time.”

As Sehwa took the pills and put them in the front pocket of his cross-bag, he found something deeply embedded inside and grabbed the fence auntie, who was about to turn away.

“Auntie. Do you know what this is?”

Since the only luggage he had was some money and documents, he had only carried this bag when he cleaned out his lodging today. After returning to the office from the bunker, his clothes and bag had been taken away again, so he himself had forgotten, but Gi Taejeong had once given him some kind of badge to keep. It was an object he had found curious because he seemed to not know its purpose either.

“Wow… I haven’t seen this in a long time. This was used for moving between ports a long, long time ago. They made it to give as a reward to rebel informants, but the 5-star gentlemen got angry, saying why divide the districts if they were going to do this, so it disappeared right away. It’s been over 30 years? No, almost 40 years?”

“Ah… so it’s like a free pass.”

“Yeah, yeah. I only knew because smugglers sometimes looked for it, but people these days wouldn’t know even if they saw it. Are you going to sell all of these?”

“Ah, no. It’s not mine. Someone I know asked me to ask about it.”

The fence auntie clicked his tongue in disappointment.

“If you’re going to sell them, make sure you come find me. Don’t give them to anyone else.”

“I will.”

As he pushed the bundle of badges into his cross-bag, his phone alarm blared loudly. It was the signal for the end of his short outing.

“This is Sector 2 from here.”

Sergeant Major Choi pointed to the buildings beyond the window, briefly explaining what was what. Sehwa just nodded blankly.

3:43 PM. At an awkward time, Sergeant Major Choi knocked on the office door. Gi Taejeong had work and would come directly to the official residence in the evening, so it was time to leave. The car parked in front of the building was a type he had never seen before. The body was so long he wondered if it could even run on four wheels, and it had a slightly unique license plate.

Sergeant Major Choi subtly informed him, sensing Sehwa’s curious gaze, “It’s a limousine only officers can ride.” Hearing that, familiar symbols caught his eye here and there. The eye of a bird in the very center of the license plate gleamed menacingly.

So, he was riding in that strange car, heading towards Sector 5. If it had been just Sector 3, he would have been nervous. But Sector 5. Moreover, the car he was riding in was completely unusual, so it didn’t feel real at all. Sehwa was so calm that even he found himself unfamiliar.

“Moving by port is faster and more convenient, but when entering Sector 5, the Brigadier General said, no, that… he suggested showing Lee Sehwa-ssi the scenery once.”

“…Brigadier General-nim?”

“Yes. It’s your first visit to Sector 5, after all.”

Then Sergeant Major Choi stared intently at Sehwa. His gaze was uncomfortably direct. It was as if… he expected Sehwa to show a great reaction after hearing his story.