Lick Me Up If You Can Novel (Completed) - Chapter 152

“It was really fun, wasn’t it?”

Julie asked as soon as the movie ended. Koi, with an excited face, nodded, agreeing with her. They left the theater and walked down the street, continuing to talk about the movie and the actor. Julie was witty, and Koi greatly enjoyed their conversation. Before they knew it, they had reached the street where the subway station was visible.

“Today was really fun.”

Julie said, facing Koi. Koi also smiled and opened his mouth.

“Me too. Thanks to you, I saw a good movie. Thank you.”

It was also his first time eating caramel popcorn. Looking back, he realized he had missed out on quite a lot in life. Only then did he understand that his life until now had been solely about coming to the East to meet Ashley.

So what should I do now that I’ve achieved my goal?

He stood rooted to the spot for a moment, dazed.

Then, from now on, I…

He was standing frozen, his mind blank. Julie, looking up at him, misunderstood. A small, delicate hand, completely unlike a man’s rough hand, cupped Koi’s cheek, and she lifted her head. Koi merely watched as her lips approached. Her eyelashes slowly lowered, her eyelids gently closed, and her lips parted slightly in anticipation.

“Koi.”

“Ah…!”

In an instant, he instinctively pushed Julie’s hand away and stepped back. Julie’s surprised face came into his widened vision. Too late, Koi realized what he had done and turned pale.

“Ju-Julie, I… I’m sorry. Um, so… that is.”

Even as he stammered and rambled, he clearly thought he had to make some excuse. But the more he thought, only one thing came to mind: the gentle voice that called his name, the soft lips, the trembling breath, the arms that hugged him so tightly it hurt, and.

“I want you to be happy.”

Ashley looked at him and smiled.

“Very much. The happiest.”

Koi’s eyes widened, and he held his breath. Towards him, Ashley spoke gently.

“I hope you are the happiest person in this world.”

I can’t be.

Just as he realized it was as if struck by lightning, Julie, who had recovered first, spoke.

“I guess I rushed things too much.”

“Huh?”

Koi blinked belatedly, looking down at her. Only then did he remember what he had been doing, and his face quickly paled. He had completely forgotten Julie’s presence. Realizing this about himself, his mind went even blanker.

Seeing Koi’s expression, Julie smiled casually and said,

“Well, I’ll get going then. You have my number, right? You make the next contact.”

Julie gently pressed Koi’s chest with her index finger, smiled sweetly, then turned and walked towards the subway station. Koi stared blankly at her retreating figure, finally coming to his senses only after Julie had completely disappeared from his sight.

Haa, a deep sigh escaped him involuntarily. What on earth have I done? Koi stood there for a while, then started walking aimlessly. It was the weekend, and families and couples passed him by, sharing happy laughter. Only Koi walked with a glum face.

“Ah!”

Someone bumped hard into his shoulder and passed by, but he didn’t even hear an apology. The man had already walked far away with hurried steps. Koi looked at him for a moment, then continued walking.

The chaotic noise around him continued, but Koi didn’t hear it. His mind was filled with something else entirely.

Why did I get so startled and push her away then?

It was more like a feeling of repulsion than surprise. He had thought he had a good time with Julie, and he had definitely felt attracted to her until then, so why?

Without reaching a conclusion, he returned home. As he entered his damp basement room, he could finally breathe slowly, his constricted breath easing.

He wanted to collapse onto the bed as he was, but he couldn’t. He shouldn’t treat the precious clothes Ashley had given him so carelessly.

He carefully unbuttoned his shirt one by one. This white shirt was unfamiliar to Koi, who usually only wore old t-shirts.

If Ash hadn’t bought it for me, I would never have even thought of wearing it.

Koi’s hands, which had unconsciously moved, gradually slowed. Ashley had bought him these clothes so he would have a good date with Julie.

I ruined it.

Of course. How could he dare to meet someone else, laugh and talk, and say he liked them again?

You’re the only one I like.

The strength slowly drained from his hands, which had been holding the button, and soon they hung limply towards the floor. Koi stood there, leaving his hands to hang.

I didn’t want something like friendship.

Koi thought blankly. Ashley’s voice echoed in his ears again.

“I want you to be happy.”

Impossible.

Suddenly, his vision blurred. Koi stood still.

How can I be happy without you?

“Let’s be friends.”

No, I can’t. Because, because I…

Tears welled up in his eyes, then streamed down his cheeks, dripping onto the floor. Koi tried to stop them, but as soon as one tear fell, another filled his eyes, overflowing repeatedly.

Eventually, he couldn’t hold back and rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand, sobbing uncontrollably. He had thought it was all over now. He had convinced himself that he was just putting a proper end to feelings that hadn’t been properly concluded, that only guilt remained, and he had come this far.

It was all a misconception. How could he have dared to think such a thing? To forget you, to give up on his feelings for you, to think he could end it all like that.

When I still like you this much.

But for Ashley, it was already over. He would never look back at Koi. If not, he wouldn’t have said something like “let’s be friends.” Perhaps it was a remark meant to draw a line in advance, having noticed his feelings first.

My feelings are still the same.

The moment he realized this, the tears didn’t stop, continuing to stream down his cheeks.

“What on earth happened?”

The next evening, Ariel, her face swollen, asked Koi, whom she had called out. Koi, feeling interrogated, sat across from his old friend in a cheap bar, his head bowed. Ariel continued to press him.

“Julie told me you didn’t seem to like her, but that’s not true, is it? No man would dislike a good girl like Julie.”

“Of course not, I did have feelings for Julie.”

“Then what?”

Ariel asked sharply. He had been helpless against her since childhood. Koi, succumbing to the cheerleader’s charisma, finally confessed what had happened that day. Ariel, who had been listening with a frown, let out a loud gasp when Koi mentioned rejecting Julie’s kiss.

“Why on earth did you do that? You know you committed a huge offense, right?”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

When he spoke honestly, Ariel frowned and asked,

“Was it your first kiss? No, right? You must have done everything with Ash. I remember he was pretty quick with his hands.”

“Th-that’s.”

It was Ariel’s assumption, but Koi’s face flushed crimson. Seeing his reaction, Ariel raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

“What? That reaction. Anyone would think Ash didn’t even touch you at all.”

“…”

Seeing Koi speechless, Ariel’s eyes gradually widened.

“No way, right?”

Ariel asked in a raised voice, as if she couldn’t believe it.

“Is it true? That guy didn’t even touch you once while you were dating him? Ashley Miller?”

Flustered, Koi hastily shook his head, denying it.

“N-no, that’s not it. We, we did kiss.”

“Kiiiiss?”

Ariel drew out the word sarcastically, then sighed in exasperation.

“You said you dated him for over a year? And all you did during that time was kiss? That’s all?”

Koi was too embarrassed by the situation but had no choice but to confess honestly. It was a hurdle he would have to cross someday anyway. He had braced himself, but unable to control his flushed face, he lowered his head.

“I… I was clumsy…”

Ariel looked at him in silence for a moment, then sighed and gulped down the beer on the table. Finally, she slammed the empty glass down with a thud, her eyes glinting as she muttered in a low voice,

“Honestly, tell me. What did that bastard do to you?”