Kiss Me if You Can Novel Completed - Chapter 89

Josh, who had patted Pete, who was crying and clinging to him again, opened his mouth with a serious expression.

“What are you doing, seriously?”

Chase glanced at him. Josh stroked his cheek and continued in a still subdued voice.

“You’ll get a scar.”

Chase only gave a bitter smile to Josh, who was looking at his scratched and dirty face. That made Josh even more upset, and he blurted out gruffly.

“You’re a mess right now.”

“It’s okay.”

For the first time, Chase spoke. But that was all. Josh, who was speechless at the simple remark, let out a sigh.

“Why did you do it?”

Josh asked, his face contorted.

“You’re afraid of dogs. So why didn’t you run away and save Pete? …Getting hurt like this.”

Chase looked at him. His unwavering gaze was fixed on Josh.

“He’s your child.”

Josh’s eyes widened instantly. Seeing him speechless in surprise, Chase smiled with a tired face.

“…Is that all?”

Josh’s voice trembled faintly. Chase only smiled in response. But because of that, Josh was sure that he had spoken his truest feelings than ever before.

At that moment, Josh could no longer hold back and confessed.

“He’s your child.”

“…”

Chase faintly furrowed his brow, as if asking what he meant. Josh, with a trembling voice, said again.

“He’s your child, Pete. …Our son, yours and mine.”

“…”

Chase still said nothing. He only looked at Josh. He clearly hadn’t grasped what he had heard. Josh waited silently until he accepted the reality.

After what felt like a long time, Chase’s gaze slowly shifted to Pete. His face, covered in mud, grass, and all sorts of things, felt unfamiliar, as if he was seeing it for the first time. He opened his mouth and, after a long pause, asked.

“How old is he?”

Chase had only said that because he hadn’t been able to organize the countless questions swirling in his mind. Josh bit and released his trembling lip, then said.

“When I was your bodyguard before, you went into rut. You might not remember, though.”

“…”

“You slept with me then.”

Josh waited for Chase’s reaction, feeling like a prisoner awaiting his sentence. He was silent for a long time. It felt as if he had stopped breathing. After a long silence that felt like half a lifetime, Chase opened his mouth.

“I…”

Josh looked up at his wildly trembling voice. Chase was looking at him with an expression mixed with shock and fear.

“I… raped you?”

“No, no!”

Josh immediately denied it. Seeing Chase’s face full of disbelief, he said again.

“I slept with you because I wanted to.”

That was the truth. Josh confessed repeatedly.

“I wanted to, I liked you so much, so I slept with you. …You did nothing wrong.”

Chase, as if shocked, remained silent, his eyes wide. Looking at him like that, Josh’s chest ached, and his eyes stung.

“I’m sorry.”

“…”

“I’m sorry for not telling you all this time, for lying.”

Chase only looked at Josh, who apologized with a faint trembling voice. Josh thought he would accept any criticism he received. After all, wasn’t that what he had prepared himself for? That everything might end like this. Just going back to the beginning.

As a corner of his heart ached faintly, Chase suddenly muttered.

“…That’s a relief.”

Josh blinked in surprise. Incredibly, Chase’s eyes were filled with tears. He had truly meant what he said. Chase, who had let out a trembling sigh, opened his mouth.

“I knew I had slept with someone.”

“…”

“I clearly had a partner during my rut, but I couldn’t remember anything. So I’ve been searching for the past few years…”

“You searched? For me?”

When a surprised Josh asked, Chase covered his face with both hands and let out a trembling sigh.

“No one appeared, and I couldn’t find any trace, so I really thought, did I do it with a dog?“

“No!”

Josh urgently stopped him.

“You never did it with a dog, Chase.”

It was visible how Chase flinched and froze. Josh continued, unable to hide his regret.

“Grayson lied.”

Slowly, Chase lowered his hands. Shock was clearly visible on his face. Josh gently kissed his forehead.

“Because you kept refusing, he just said that to scare you…”

“That damned bastard, I’ll kill him!”

It was then that Chase suddenly shouted and sat up. Pete, who had been dozing off behind him, startled and burst into tears again. Josh quickly held the child and began to comfort him.

“Watch your mouth, in front of the child.”

At Josh’s rare, genuine warning, Chase shut his mouth. But the surging anger was too great to suppress. He sprang up and began to pace rapidly in the same spot.

“He said he did it for you.”

Josh conveyed the message, even though he himself didn’t believe it. Chase immediately stopped pacing and glared at him with a terrifying gaze.

“Grayson doesn’t know what emotions are. He just imitates them.”

Josh, who was watching him, shoulders heaving with anger, opened his mouth again.

“He said you’ve never been with anyone else.”

Chase, who had been tearing at his hair, paused again. To his surprised eyes, Josh continued.

“He always removed it with an injection, and the reason he hid it until now was to deliberately scare you because you kept refusing.”

“…”

“Murder is not allowed, Chase.”

Josh calmly but firmly stopped him.

“I’ve already beaten him up pretty well, but if you want, I can kidnap him so you can hit him yourself.”

“Good.”

“Good.”

The two made a simple deal. Of course, Chase, still not appeased, sighed at the sky, clenched and unclenched his fists, and kicked the ground, venting his anger for a while.

Only after his emotions had somewhat calmed down did he finally run a hand through his hair in annoyance. As Josh stood up, holding Pete, who had started dozing off again, Chase’s gaze turned to them.

The way he looked at Pete was distinctly different from before. It was a complex expression, a mix of bewilderment and difficulty, but also wonder and affection. Josh stood silently, waiting for him to sort out his emotions.

“…The one you slept with before, but couldn’t remember.”

“It’s you.”

At the prompt answer, Chase was about to say something but quickly shut his mouth. Josh immediately noticed that he had suppressed another curse.

Pete, perhaps sensing the strange atmosphere, opened his eyes. Chase’s gaze lingered on the child, who blinked his half-closed eyelids and looked around. The silence was more overwhelming and sweet than ever. Chase finally opened his mouth and spoke.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save Jason.”

Pete, who had been looking at him with a quiet voice, smiled brightly. To Chase, who flinched and blinked, Pete said.

“It’s okay.”

Chase gazed at his son, who closed his eyes and fell asleep again, and asked.

“Wasn’t he a treasured friend?”

“He was.”

Josh gave a bitter smile.

“Now, it seems your face pleases him more.”

“…”

“Aren’t you happy?”

At the unexpected silence, Chase suddenly threw an annoyed glance.

“Like you?”

“Me?”

When Josh asked, Why me? Chase gritted his teeth.

“You only like me because of my face anyway.”

Josh paused. Chase spoke as if suppressing his anger.

“You only like my face too, so you’re the same. Aren’t you?”

Josh barely managed to stop himself from saying, Then what do you have left besides your face? Now was not the time for jokes.

“Fool.”

“What?”

Chase immediately got angry. Josh said with a bitter smile.

“That’s also you.”

“…”

“It’s all yours.”

Josh emphasized once more and then joked.

“Besides, think about it, if I hadn’t fallen for your face at first, I wouldn’t have just let it go when you said I could hit you.”

Chase asked, dumbfounded.

“You let me off because of my face?”

“I didn’t do a roundhouse kick.”

At Josh’s shameless reply, Chase let out a sigh of exasperation but ultimately said nothing. Deciding to stop teasing him, Josh seriously opened his mouth.

“The first time might have been because of pheromones.”

“…”

“It might have been because of your face too.”

Chase hesitated and asked.

“And now?”

“Now.”

Josh smiled with an embarrassed expression. Chase looked as if he was nervous for the first time. He opened his mouth and seemed to take a breath, then Josh finally confessed.

“…I love you.”

Chase’s eyes widened. “Ah,” Josh realized. I’ve never truly said these words before.

“I love you.”

He declared again, as if reaffirming it. Why didn’t I know until now that these words were so sweet?