In This Life I Will Be The Lord Novel - Side Story, Chapter 34

“Teach you?”

“Yes, please.”

Perez bowed his head again.

But Gallahan refused.

“I am not a great enough father to teach anyone.”

A hint of sadness crossed his face as he spoke.

“I am merely a lucky father.”

Florentia resembled his strong wife.

She had grown steadily on her own, becoming a large tree that could now provide shade for countless people.

All Gallahan had done was watch his child grow by her side.

“So, Your Majesty’s request…”

“No. Father-in-law is fully qualified.”

His words were firm.

Gallahan’s eyes, which had habitually sunk into the empty glass, turned back to Perez.

“As you know, I grew up without knowing the affection of family. Let alone the warm affection of parents.”

Perez spoke calmly, as if murmuring.

“However, I vaguely know what it is. Because I have watched Tia, who is happier than anyone, by your side, in your infinite affection and trust.”

A gentle smile had already formed on Perez’s lips.

“It’s not because you are Tia’s father. I am asking the person who has most excellently fulfilled the role of a father among those I know.”

“Your Majesty.”

“Please give me a chance to be a good father too. I want to be someone Tia and the child to be born will not be ashamed of.”

Gallahan gazed for a moment at the red eyes that seemed devoid of flattery.

As he met his gaze without averting his eyes, a younger face overlapped.

Even then, Perez looked just like that.

And he had thought then.

‘This child is truly strong, just like our Tia.’

He touched his lips, then let out a small laugh and asked.

“You mean you think you are lacking as a good father because you grew up without knowing affection?”

“Yes, that’s right.”

Gallahan nodded and rose from his seat.

And as if to a child, he stood in front of Perez, bending halfway to meet his eye level.

“I don’t think so. Your Majesty will be a good father.”

“But…”

Gallahan’s hand rested on the shoulder of the young Emperor, who was uncharacteristically showing a lack of confidence.

“Your Majesty will be a good father.”

“Ah…”

The strict, unwavering words were like an incantation.

His uneasy heart gradually calmed.

Perez looked at the firm hand on his shoulder and thought.

Yes, maybe.

Maybe I can be a good father too.

A vague feeling like that welled up.

Perez clenched his fist at the unfamiliar sensation, which he had never felt before, but which made his chest feel strong.

It felt awkward and he didn’t know what to do.

Watching his reaction from close by, Gallahan smiled gently.

Then he patted Perez’s shoulder, as if comforting him.

“Just by worrying about how to be a good father, Your Majesty already possesses the qualities.”

“Thank you…”

“Besides, Your Majesty is already far ahead of my past self.”

“Me?”

“Yes. At least Your Majesty is fine, aren’t you? When I first found out Shan was pregnant, I cried like a baby…”

Gallahan’s voice trailed off.

“…No way.”

Perez subtly averted his gaze.

“Pfft! …Ahem.”

Gallahan, who somehow managed to suppress his bursting laughter with a cough, took a breath and said.

“Anyway, don’t worry too much. I, and the people of Lombardi, will help you.”

Then, something that could directly help Perez suddenly came to mind.

“Please wait here for a moment, Your Majesty.”

With that, Gallahan disappeared into the bedroom.

“Whew.”

Left alone, Perez stared blankly at his retreating back, then let out a sigh he had been holding in, wiping his embarrassed face.

And he looked down at his hands.

The overwhelming feeling of standing alone before a house-sized wave was gone.

But his shoulders felt a little heavier.

“A good husband, a good father.”

Perhaps it was a more difficult task than anything he had ever accomplished.

But a faint smile had already appeared on Perez’s lips.

The wedding was now tomorrow.
***

Perez had returned to the Imperial Palace early in the morning, saying he had something to prepare.

For a brief moment, it felt like life had returned to normal.

Besides, I was just as busy.

There was a lot to prepare because I had to officially take over the Empress’s duties after the wedding.

Throughout the day, the patriarchs of the vassal families came and went from my office.

They all seemed to have heard the news by then, and didn’t forget to offer their congratulations.

And the last turn was, finally.

“Welcome, Clerivan.”

I greeted him warmly.

“Greetings, Lady Florentia.”

…Huh?

Something was off.

His polite greeting and neat approval documents were all typical of Clerivan.

A subtle sense of unease slowly crept up.

“Today, there are a lot of things to approve, as expected.”

“That’s usually the case.”

What was it, what on earth could it be?

I fell into thought, signing each document Clerivan handed me.

Scratch, scratch.

Only the sound of my quill moving filled the quiet office.

“Ah.”

And then I realized.

Clerivan was silent.

Not even his usual light jokes.

I stole a glance at Clerivan’s face in between exchanging documents.

Oh my.

It was a poker face I hadn’t seen in a long time.

Clerivan always used to smile when he was in front of me.

“Hmm.”

Even until the last signature, silence filled the office.

Ah, this won’t do.

Just as I was about to break this unfamiliar atmosphere first.

“…Clerivan.”

“May I ask one thing?”

Clerivan spoke as he organized the signed documents.

“Was the incident where the Matriarch collapsed previously also related to the baby?”

Ah, right.

I bit my tongue.

I had completely forgotten.

Clerivan was one of the few people who knew I had suddenly collapsed.

He must have been very worried about it.

So many things had happened that I had forgotten to properly explain the reason.

‘He’s angry. He has every right to be angry.’

I quickly replied, feeling apologetic.

“Yes. It was due to severe morning sickness.”

I was prepared to accept whatever complaints, or even anger, Clerivan might have about my insensitivity.

But.

“I see. Understood.”

“That’s… all?”

When I asked, bewildered, Clerivan briefly added.

“Congratulations, Lady Florentia.”

It really seemed that was the end of it.

I finally asked, feeling nervous.

“Are you… perhaps angry?”

“Pardon?”

“No, it just seems like it.”

Even if not for others, I should have given a heads-up to those who had gone into emergency mode, thinking I was unwell.

That was right.

No, even if that wasn’t the case, I should have paid a little more attention to Clerivan.

He was my teacher, my most trusted colleague, and a friend I had spent a long time with.

“I’m sorry, Clerivan.”

Clerivan had a strange expression when he heard my apology.

He briefly put down the documents he was holding and asked.

“May I speak for a moment, not as the head of Lombardi Merchant Guild, but as someone who has watched Lady Florentia for a long time?”

Finally, it was coming.

I nodded resolutely.

“Then, please excuse me for a moment.”

With my permission, Clerivan strode forward.

What would he say?

Would I be scolded for not fulfilling my duties as Matriarch?

I looked up at Clerivan, who stood before me, feeling a little nervous with various thoughts.

“C-Clerivan?”

The smile that formed on his cold face, as if by magic, was completely contrary to my expectations.

It was like witnessing the moment an ice flower bloomed.

“You are admirable.”

Something fluttered in my hair as I still stared up blankly.

It was Clerivan’s hand caressing my head.

“When did our little lady grow so much?”

Choke.

Something welled up without me being able to stop it.

“If the opportunity arises, I, Clerivan, will wholeheartedly teach the child who is to be born as well.”

“Oh, really.”

I didn’t want to cry.

Under the hand that still gently stroked my head, I was back to being the child who first met Clerivan, holding a book in my arms that day.

“You know this is cheating, right?”

My voice was already wet with tears.

“I know. But I really wanted to tell you.”

“…Thank you.”

Finally, a tear rolled down.

Clerivan, smiling, unhesitatingly wiped away that tear.

But without any reward for that, what I had held back until now, what I had suppressed even in front of Father and Perez, burst out so easily.

I buried my face in Clerivan’s arms and sobbed.

How much time passed like that?

Lateness and embarrassment washed over me.

“Sniff. Merchant work and education too. Don’t you dare back out later saying it’s too hard.”

“How could I?”

Even at my slightly grumbling words, Clerivan’s hand, which stroked my head until the very end, was warm.

I sat there for a moment, taking a few deep breaths.

After a good cry, it was time to return to my place.

I wiped my face with the back of my hand, knowing it must be swollen and red even without looking in the mirror, and stood up.

“Thank you, Clerivan.”

“I am glad if I could be of help to the Matriarch.”

Clerivan, who had already stepped back a pace with his hands clasped behind his back, returning to his role as the head of Lombardi Merchant Guild, replied politely.

Lombardi Matriarch, Empress, and Mother.

The fear that I might not be able to do all of it well completely disappeared.

I’m not alone.

So, I just need to keep doing what I’ve been doing.

From tomorrow, another life as Empress awaited me, but the anxiety that had been weighing me down was gone.

“Crying made me hungry. Shall we go eat? How about it, do you have time?”

“For the Matriarch, anytime.”

As always, I naturally led the way.

And also as always, Clerivan’s steady footsteps followed behind me.
***

It was the day of the wedding.

With the main ceremony to be held at the Lombardi mansion and the reception at the Imperial Palace, outside was already bustling with guests.

Except for the bridal waiting room where I was sitting.

Knock, knock.

“Tia, are you ready? May I come in?”

Father’s cautious voice was heard from outside the door.

“Come in.”

With a soft creak of the door, Father’s footsteps grew closer.

I smiled at Father, who was reflected in the mirror beyond my white veil, still seated.

“How do I look, Father?”