I Became a Slave to the Man I Abandoned Novel (Completed) - Chapter 7

Nox knew exactly what she meant. Half of his blood came from his filthy father, but the other half belonged to his pure mother. He was foolish, but not stupid. That was one of Nox’s many misfortunes.

“…Move Khalid to my room.”

“But…”

Madam ordered he be thrown out, Maeta’s worried voice trembled in the air. Nox slowly closed his eyes, which were burning with heat as if tears were about to fall, then opened them again and said quietly,

“It’s fine.”

His voice was already sinking into numbness.

“Once everything is settled, I’ll make sure he leaves properly.”

Maeta hesitated for a moment, then nodded. She ordered the servants to carry Khalid to Nox’s room. Drip. Drip. Blood dripped from Khalid’s back.

Their path to the room was marked by stains of blood. Nox followed those stains slowly, each step heavier than the last.

He wanted to keep the boy hidden away in his room, away from everyone’s eyes. But for Khalid’s sake for his safety he had to admit that sending him away was the better choice.

Nox had expected danger from his father, always lurking. But he never imagined that even his mother, Olga, had been watching Khalid. Staring at the boy’s back as he was carried away by a servant, Nox’s eyes sank into blackness.

Creeeak

They walked down the long hallway. The servant opened the door to Nox’s room first and carefully laid Khalid down so that his back faced the ceiling. Nox gestured for the servant to leave. Reading the signal, the servant quietly closed the door behind him.

Creak. Thud.

Once the door shut, only the boy’s ragged breathing and Nox’s own restrained heartbeat filled the room. Nox dragged a chair over and sat beside the bed, staring at the blood soaking into the sheets. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Khalid’s face.

Tick. Tick.

Time moved slowly. The bleeding from Khalid’s back had begun to slow, but the wounds from the thorned whip were severe. Nox thought he had to ensure the boy received proper treatment outside the estate. Of course, it had to be done in a way that made it seem like it hadn’t come from him.

“…Ugh…”

Who knew how much time had passed when Khalid let out a weak groan and opened his eyes. His voice was harsh and broken.

Nox had been staring at the floor. Now, with eyes dark as night, he looked at the boy. Khalid’s face was drenched in cold sweat.

He wanted to reach out and wipe it away. He wanted to say he was sorry that he had been wrong. But instead, he bit down hard on his tongue. If he didn’t sever things now, his mother Olga would eventually do it for him.

“You’re awake?”

“Y-Young master?”

“Yes, Khalid.”

Nox’s voice was no longer the gentle one that had once called Khalid’s name so fondly. It was cold. Hard. As if he were addressing a complete stranger. Khalid’s eyes, just regaining clarity, quivered with anxiety. He reached out, hoping Nox would take his hand.

Nox fought the urge to grab the slowly approaching hand and, instead, slapped it away with the back of his own. Khalid’s eyes widened in disbelief.

“…I-I made a mistake.”

Khalid’s voice trembled as he tried to explain, as if desperate to fix what was happening. It was heartbreaking. The boy even tried to smile, though he was covered in blood. Trying to erase the creeping dread that consumed him.

“Y-you never said anything, so I… I must’ve misunderstood. You’re angry because I crossed a line, right?”

Khalid reached for Nox’s hand again. Nox tried to pull away, but the boy’s grip had grown stronger without him noticing. Nox bit down harder on his tongue. His fingers trembled. He did his best to hide it.

“Khalid.”

“Please, don’t say anything.”

“Khalid.”

“Please… What did I do wrong?”

It was as if Khalid had already sensed what was coming. Of course he had. From the moment Nox asked him to bring the brooch and then pretended nothing had happened, Khalid must have known something was off. And when the lashes began he didn’t deserve he must have realized everything had gone terribly wrong.

Staring at the sweat-drenched, ash-blond hair, Nox said, without meeting the boy’s eyes,

“I think you should leave the estate.”

Khalid fell silent. His wide blue eyes opened even further.

“I’m going to be engaged soon. To someone suitable.”

Nox tilted his head slightly, as if it were no big deal. As if it didn’t hurt. He was trying desperately to act composed.

“Khalid, do you love me?”

And then, he delivered the cruelest blow.

“That’s your fault.”

Khalid so young could say nothing. When someone tells you that your feelings themselves are a mistake, it’s hard to even speak.

“It’s your fault for showing me your love so openly.”

“Y-young master…”

Khalid’s voice barely slipped from his throat. His whole body, soaked in sweat and blood, trembled. The boy’s mind spun. He wanted to faint. This had to be a dream. Just a little while ago, the young master had looked at him so gently. This couldn’t be real.

Khalid tried to sit up, bracing himself with one arm. Nox, watching him, brushed off the boy’s hand again.

“Once you’re strong enough, I’d like you to leave as soon as possible.”

“Do you… mean that?”

“I do. You understand, right? I even got my mother involved.”

Nox forced a smile. The corners of his mouth twitched, but he managed it. He could only hope it looked like a real smile. Khalid got up. With that bloodied body of his.

Nox had expected Khalid to yell. To curse him. To scream, How could you betray me like this? But

Thud.

The opposite happened. Khalid dropped to his knees in front of Nox’s chair. Nox’s eyes widened.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Khalid clung to Nox’s trousers.

“I won’t let it show anymore.”

Tears streamed down his cheeks. He begged just as he once had in front of Olga, pleading to be allowed to stay at the estate.

“I’ll try not to be seen. I’ll stay out of your way.”

The boy released Nox’s trousers and brought his hands together in prayer. Wide, pleading blue eyes. Hands clasped in apology for something that wasn’t even his fault. It drove Nox to madness.

“Please… Just let me stay in this estate.”

Nox couldn’t speak. Only his lips moved silently. He had thought Khalid would be angry, and would explode with resentment. But he’d been wrong. He hadn’t loved the boy enough to understand just how deep Khalid’s love had grown. He hadn’t meant for it to grow this much. Hadn’t known it had.

“…Khalid.”

“Y-yes… my young master…”

Nox tried to maintain his smile. It felt like his insides were rotting. Every word he spoke wasn’t just a blade to Khalid it cut himself as well. But he forced the next words out as if biting through his own tongue.

“You’re not someone who can love me.”

Khalid stopped breathing.

“Don’t even think you can.”

Thud. The boy’s hands fell.

“You… know your place.”

Nox slowly stood. As if this was all routine. As if there was nothing more to say.

“I need to get to knight training. I’d like you to be gone before I return.”

Khalid said nothing. Nox clenched his trembling hands behind his back, so the boy wouldn’t see.

“Take care.”

A farewell as cruel as a blade. Telling him to live well after throwing him away like that.

“You’re beautiful. I’m sure you’ll live well wherever you go.”

That, Nox hoped, would be enough to spark some resentment. Enough for Khalid to hate him.

Nox walked out without turning back. Click. The door shut behind him, and darkness fell as if severing their bond. The corridor felt especially dim today. Nox stood there for a moment, staring up at the ceiling. His eyes burned, but he knew better than anyone that he didn’t have the right to cry.

“Young master…”

Maeta, who had been waiting outside, called to him softly. Nox began walking down the corridor. Maeta followed. The one who should have been following him was no longer there.

“Find somewhere Khalid can get proper treatment. Write a letter of recommendation. Make sure he has a place to stay and money to live on for a while.”

“Yes, sir.”

“And don’t let him know it was from me.”

Maeta stopped briefly. Her face twisted with sorrow.

“But if he doesn’t know…”

Nox already knew what she wanted to say. He shook his head.

“It doesn’t matter.”

Even if the boy grows up hating me wishing I were dead it doesn’t matter. Maeta seemed to understand his heart. She said no more.

Nox lingered outside for a long time. Long enough for the boy to recover. Long enough to hate him. Long enough to leave him completely.