Eighteen’s Bed Novel Completed - Chapter 65

I didn’t know when it was written, who wrote it, or if this ‘Kang’ really referred to me, but I instinctively knew it was about me.

I had always been composed towards everyone who insulted me. I knew well that everyone who insulted me was actually jealous of me. Their criticism stemmed from my success. They must have been annoyed that a bookworm who had never fallen out of the top ranks hung out with high-status guys.

But this graffiti was different. In just four characters, it completely showed my downfall.

To be precise, they had realized that I, Kang Jun, had been abandoned by their emperor.

“Pathetic bastards.”

I said that, but my face was red with shame and anger. It was a stroke of luck that the lights were off because the PPT was on. Otherwise, everyone would have known I was humiliated.

“Just a few days…”

Boys are more sensitive than people think. They pretend not to care but are more aware of others’ opinions than anyone. They pretend not to care because if they are caught being aware of others’ opinions, they will fall. If they care too much, they lose their ‘cool,’ and if they don’t pay attention to others’ opinions, they lose ‘friendship.’

That’s why they must have quickly noticed the relationship between Go Yohan and me.

With trembling hands, I covered ‘Deposed Queen Kang.’ I pressed the edge of my hand firmly against the desk and rubbed hard, but the words written with a permanent marker didn’t erase. Still, I clenched my fist, hid my humiliation, held my head high, and suppressed the churning in my stomach.

“Just a few weeks…”

I thought, forcing down the surge of emotion with stubbornness.

This was no time to be like this. I had to do something. No. First, I had to erase this graffiti before anyone saw it. I felt a hot flush beneath my eyelids, but I desperately held it back. I bit my lip when no one was looking.

I almost turned my head to look at Go Yohan, but I managed to hold that back quite well too.

And as soon as class ended, when I hastily borrowed alcohol from the nurse’s office and returned to the science lab, the permanent marker on the desk had smudged into a purple stain. The fear that someone had seen this graffiti. I was drenched in the despair that my downfall had been revealed. That emotion came all at once. At the same time, a chemistry teacher I didn’t even know existed appeared. He looked at me with pitiful eyes and said.

“Shin Jaehyun erased that for you. Go thank him.”

His eyes were full of pity for me.

At the same time, I despaired. Now, rumors about me would spread all over the teachers’ office. I wanted to die.

The first time I saw Shin Jaehyun’s name was on the paper with mock exam scores posted in the hallway.

31st in the entire school. He was such a quiet student that if the chemistry teacher hadn’t told me his name, I would never have been able to guess who he was.

After that incident, I observed Shin Jaehyun for three days.

Looking back, Shin Jaehyun was the first middle-class kid I started observing on my own accord.

I kept wondering. How did he see that graffiti, why did he erase it, was it kindness, pity, a sense of justice, did he tell anyone about the graffiti, did he unconsciously spread rumors? I didn’t even know when the graffiti was written, and it was clear that many eyes had already seen it, yet I clung to the name Shin Jaehyun. Because he was the only witness I had found.

Then, the rumors I heard about Shin Jaehyun were unexpected.

To be honest, he was such a hypocritical character that it was annoying. He lived in the US until middle school, was surprisingly a typical outdoorsy type, and had a personality that flowed smoothly and was unremarkable. He didn’t belong to any group or form cliques due to his uniquely optimistic personality, but he also wasn’t disliked. That’s what the kids who often hung out with Shin Jaehyun said.

Shin Jaehyun. Positive freak. LA man. A guy who’s been exposed to American culture. Sometimes he can’t speak Korean, and he can’t speak English either. ‘Things will work out somehow’ is his life motto, and despite that, he’s a reliable guy who keeps his mouth shut. That was the assessment of Shin Jaehyun.

Ironically, his reputation among teachers wasn’t very good.

He seemed to be classified as a featureless child rather than a bad one. When I subtly asked my homeroom teacher about Shin Jaehyun while asking for printouts, this was the answer I got:

“Jaehyun? He’s a good kid. Sometimes he forgets his homework, though.”

Other reactions that followed were like this:

“Was Shin Jaehyun a kid from Class 1?”

“Yes. He’s in our class.”

“Oh, really?”

Teachers tended to trust me excessively. That tendency became even stronger after I became a fixture at first place in the entire school. Talkative teachers would casually drop a word or two, evaluating Shin Jaehyun in front of me. They probably told me because it wasn’t a negative evaluation. The homeroom teacher suddenly asked, as if curious.

“But why Jaehyun?”

“No.”

I naturally adjusted the printouts the teacher handed me.

“Because he seems kind.”

“He’s a good kid.”

The teacher, who usually saw people in a good light, said it sincerely.

“As kind as you are.”

After hearing that, I felt secretly relieved. My thoughts were organized. It seemed unlikely that rumors would spread.

After that, I spoke to Shin Jaehyun only once. I took advantage of a chaotic moment during a moving class. In the midst of the crowd, I approached Shin Jaehyun and uttered just one word.

“Thanks.”

This was less a genuine expression of gratitude and more a plea for him not to tell anyone about my humiliation. You’re a good kid, so you won’t ignore me, right? He’s a mature kid, so. Such hopes were attached to it. Shin Jaehyun, who was walking while observing the sky alone and suddenly received my thanks, said:

“For what?”

His face truly looked like he had no idea.

At that moment, I couldn’t answer because I was conscious of my surroundings. Shin Jaehyun asked the question but didn’t wait for an answer. He just smiled with a look that seemed to say he had seen a strange person, and turned his back. Surprisingly, only then did I realize why I had never heard anything bad about Shin Jaehyun.

I revised my record in my mind.

Shin Jaehyun. A better guy than I thought.

“Ah!”

A sharp scream escaped me as I suddenly felt a violent pain in my back.

“…What?”

I fumbled the burning spot with my left hand and turned around. But there was nothing in the hallway. I unconsciously lowered my head and saw an object at my feet. It was a small rubber ball. This time, I quickly looked up and scanned my surroundings, but again, there was nothing to be seen.

My position was shaking, but that didn’t mean my pride had crumbled.

I must have been born with strong pride in my genes from the beginning. The environment that allowed me to maintain that pride had made me who I was today, but sometimes strong pride could, conversely, hurt my self-esteem. Most often, it was in front of a mirror.

“If only I were just 5 centimeters taller.”

Then I would at least be over 180 cm, right? My small stature and thinner-than-average bones were my complexes. Even my mother, who gave birth to me, acknowledged it. She would always bring me herbal medicine, and every time she did, her words poked at my complex.

‘Drink it. Drink it. Gulp it down. Let’s gain just 5 kilograms, okay? Then you’ll really look good.’

Seduced by those words, I swallowed the nauseatingly bitter herbal medicine, even though I didn’t want to touch it, but unfortunately, my body wasn’t the type to gain weight. Unfortunately, having a small physique also meant it was easier to be ignored. For this reason, I clung to my grades, appearance, and friendships. To survive in the pyramid, I had to use whatever cards I had.

The fortunate thing was that I was always above average in any group. So I thought I would have a lifeline. My human relationships wouldn’t end just because things ended with Go Yohan.

Lately, I have been actively talking to the kids around me. As a reward, outside of lunchtime, I could often talk to kids sitting next to me or attending the same cram school. Even the obnoxious Oh Yeonjun was included in that.

“Hey, Kang Jun!”

But within that, there was a subtle change, so minute it was hard to notice: a ‘trampling.’

“Did you finish your homework today? Can I see your homework? Sorry, I forgot today. Huh?”

Oh Yeonjun kept getting on my nerves.

It reached its peak today.

Fifth period. The classroom was noisy with talk about performance evaluations. Generally, the classroom was filled with complaints.

“What’s with performance evaluations for seniors? Just replace it with test scores.”

“Do you want to die? What test scores? No. Ah, seriously. My head’s already splitting just thinking about the topic.”

“I’m just going to ask my mom to do it.”

“Bullshit.”

“Kang Jun, have you decided on a topic?”

“We really have nothing to do. It’s driving me crazy.”

Park Haon, who was 9th in the school, and Im Yoongi, who was 21st, asked me questions. I secretly sighed in relief and answered. These were the kids I had been most actively trying to befriend lately. Fortunately, my efforts seemed to be paying off. Because of that, my voice was a little excited.

“No. I’m going to ask my cram school teacher.”

“Which teacher? When are you going to ask?”

Oh Yeonjun, who had been listening from afar, suddenly interjected into the conversation. And then he said something unpleasant again.

“Hey! Kang Jun! Let’s ask together later. I’ll help you. Your arm is hurt, so it must be hard to write, right? Is that okay?”

“…”

I almost openly frowned. Since when were we close enough to help each other? I didn’t want to be friends with Oh Yeonjun, of all people. The more I saw him, the more uncomfortable I felt, and he provoked a bitter jealousy inside me. For now, I just wanted to avoid talking to him, so I gave a vague answer.

“Okay. Let’s ask together.”

“Alright. Then later… Oh. Right.”

‘Right,’ whenever that word came out, Oh Yeonjun always picked a fight.

“But your arm, you know. Three months, isn’t that a break, not just a crack?”

“No.”

“It is, though? My brother broke his toe and it was exactly three months.”

“Ah.”

Why is he being such a pain again? He’s making me feel stifled again. But I can’t say something that’s not true is true, can I? Besides, if I said yes here, he’d later stubbornly insist on things that weren’t true, until he heard he was right.

I absolutely did not want to give Oh Yeonjun that honor. I’m a bit of a twisted person.

“Yeonjun. You might be mistaken, don’t you think? I don’t think so.”

“No, I’m not? My brother said so! I think you’re the one who’s mistaken?”

“Do you really think I wouldn’t know my own body? It’s just a crack.”

I spoke firmly, without lengthy excuses.

“Three months… the doctor said so. To keep it for three months.”

Are you greater than a doctor? With that sarcasm, I barely managed to shut Oh Yeonjun up. It felt satisfying that his brazen mouth was silenced.

“If that’s the case… Oh, right. What I was going to tell you. See you at the cram school after class later. You absolutely have to come with me, okay? Don’t just sneak off by yourself, alright?”

Oh Yeonjun put force into his hand and pushed my shoulder. Normally, I would have braced myself with my arm, but unfortunately, one of my arms was injured. Oh, sh*t. There’s nothing more embarrassing than falling backward and tripping. Annoying Oh Yeonjun. He couldn’t even talk to me when I was with Go Yohan, but lately, he’s been annoying me by trying to climb up the ladder. And now he’s trying to embarrass me? That bastard.

“…”

But it was already too late. My good left hand couldn’t grab the desk and slipped.