Eighteen’s Bed Novel Completed - Chapter 46

Even after hearing the question, I just remained silent. What Go Yohan did was fatal to me, who was interested in him. The resentful Go Yohan grinned at me.

“Are you planning on going home now?”

“……It’s because they might be asleep now.”

“What a filial child. Thinking of your parents even in this situation.”

Go Yohan’s finger tapped the soft leather seat. It smoothly moved up and down from his index to his ring finger. His long fingers created a dissonance. Tap-tap-tap-. I swallowed, watching Go Yohan’s slightly exposed knuckles.

“If I’m here too long…”

I raised my eyes to look at Go Yohan’s face.

“Just lend me a little money. I’ll stay at a hotel for a day and pay you back tomorrow.”

“Why would I?”

Go Yohan shook his head slightly.

“I don’t want to.”

As I said before, Go Yohan would lend or refuse money based on incomprehensible criteria. My first request must have been a failure by Go Yohan’s standards. It wasn’t really unfair. I was a person who was good at self-objectification. I understood well that I was just that kind of person to Go Yohan. If I were important, he would have lent it to me somehow.

Rather, this distance was just right. A moderately disappointing, yet not rude, boundary. A lifeline-like distance that helped me, the foolish me, escape from the trap I had crawled into again.

I had no intention of doing anything with Go Yohan. I didn’t want to be hated if my feelings were exposed. I also didn’t want to live a complicated life. I thought it would be fine if we gradually grew apart when our classes split in our third year of high school. Go Yohan’s answer to my question the other day wasn’t clear, but it didn’t imply cutting off contact. Yes. I was satisfied with this much.

“Okay.”

Anyway, my phone was charged, so now I could borrow money somehow. Come to think of it, there were many ways to spend money even without borrowing it. It was just that I didn’t use it often, so it didn’t come to mind immediately. I nodded, accepting Go Yohan’s criteria.

“Understood.”

I tapped the phone screen. The time and battery percentage appeared. 56%. I quietly looked at the number, then looked back at Go Yohan and spoke.

“I’ll go as soon as it’s fully charged.”

Then Go Yohan’s expression crumpled. Go Yohan, who had been propping his head, suddenly released his hand and flopped onto the bed. Go Yohan’s small head burrowed deep into the blanket. Go Yohan, who had now turned his face completely away from me, replied:

“Okay.”

After that reply, Go Yohan was silent. I leaned my ear, wondering if he had fallen asleep, and heard faint breathing. As I sat there listening to his breathing, my eyes gently closed. I drew my knees up and wrapped my arms around them. I rested my head on them. A quiet stillness settled.

In the silence, I heard something tapping. I thought it was Go Yohan’s finger, but it wasn’t. Before long, I heard the sound of pouring water. It was raining in the middle of winter.

The long silence and my promise were broken by the heavy rain. Rain, not snow, in winter. Last winter had been the worst cold snap, but the words that this winter would be the warmest on record were true. Due to the sudden rain, darkness filled the room.

A dark afternoon. Amidst the sound of rain tapping on the window, I heard the rustle of a blanket. I felt a gaze. Slowly, I straightened my back.

Through the darkness, Go Yohan’s cool eyes were visible. This time, he was lying on his stomach. Go Yohan’s chin was buried in the blanket. The blanket was so soft that half of Go Yohan’s face was covered by the puffed-up duvet. Thanks to that, all I could see were Go Yohan’s eyes. And his puffed-up hair, as if he had just lain down and then immediately rolled onto his stomach.

Our eyes met. His cool eyes slowly curved.

“What are we going to do? Looks like we can’t even go outside now.”

“Indeed.”

“You, today.”

Go Yohan’s voice cracked at the end of his sentence. His voice sent shivers down my spine. Even then, my eyes didn’t leave Go Yohan’s.

“You’ll just have to sleep over.”

“……”

I cleared my throat so softly that Go Yohan couldn’t hear it. Otherwise, my own voice would have come out hoarse.

“Okay.”

Go Yohan looked at me quietly and said this. Go Yohan’s slightly curved eyes sank, gloomy like a dark, rainy afternoon. And Go Yohan also sank. Judging by his low murmur as he looked out the window with eyes full of gloom.

“Ah, I hate it.”

Perhaps Go Yohan hated me being at his house. He truly seemed to. It wasn’t my imagination. It was certain. Unable to bear this gloomy atmosphere, I got up.

“Where are you going?”

As soon as I stood up, Go Yohan, who had straightened his back, asked. Go Yohan’s feet, which I saw as I stood up, were out of the bed. They were really long.

“Since I’m skipping the academy today, I’m just going to study by myself.”

“Then I’ll do it with you.”

Go Yohan supported himself with his arms and got up. There was no need to get up so hastily, though. Perhaps because he got up suddenly, Go Yohan stumbled, losing his balance for a moment. I ignored him and left the room with the bed. I saw my bag sitting alone in Go Yohan’s living room.

Anyway, the only book I had with me was a workbook for supplementary classes. Still, a workbook was perfect for killing time. As I sat down at the table, taking out my workbook from my bag to do my homework, Go Yohan also sat down opposite me. He glanced at the book I had taken out and then groaned.

“Ah, seriously… why this of all things.”

“Why?”

I unconsciously looked at the book I was holding. Korean language. Go Yohan’s weakness.

“Ah.”

I realized it on my own and answered myself.

“You do something else. It’s better to maintain what you’re good at than to cling to what you’re not.”

“No.”

Go Yohan had already dragged his backpack over. He stood there, rummaging through his bag, then threw his book and pencil case onto the table.

“I’m going to do that too.”

I saw a pen that had slipped out from between the messily spread-out book and pencil case, rolling on the table. Go Yohan slumped into his seat. I observed all of Go Yohan’s actions and opened my workbook. Go Yohan looked at the page number I had opened. And then he opened to the same page as me.

“……”

When I solved one problem, he followed. When I solved another, he followed again. But Go Yohan’s pace gradually fell behind. In the end, unable to keep up with my speed, he clutched his head and groaned.

“Ah. This is ridiculously hard.”

“Indeed.”

“But considering that, you’re solving it really well? Annoyingly.”

Go Yohan sneered. I glanced at Go Yohan’s face and then buried my head back in the problem. What was ridiculously hard wasn’t the problem. It was you, Go Yohan, who wasn’t a problem, but a conundrum.

By the time I finished my homework, previewing, and reviewing incorrect answers, the sun had already set and it was dark. I looked up at the clock and it was only 5:30. If I had gone to the academy, it would have ended a little after 11. Even though I had spent my time leisurely and finished my work, the day felt spacious. Since there weren’t many mistakes, the review of incorrect answers didn’t take long.

“I’m all done…”

I quickly cut myself off. Because Go Yohan was still floundering in the mire. The wrinkles on his brow deepened. Go Yohan clicked his ballpoint pen with his long fingers. Was there really a problem that required that much thought? Black lines furiously scratched on the paper caught my eye. And the problem included in that writing. Ah. It was indeed a difficult question.

“Is it that hard?”

“Is there even an answer in here? Isn’t this problem flawed?”

As if on cue, a sullen voice blurted out. The black ballpoint pen now left the writing and scratched at the numbers attached to the problem.

“No, there’s an answer.”

I slowly reached out my hand. Go Yohan had clearly found the answer. Below the furiously scratched black line was the answer to that question. He just hadn’t realized it. I placed my finger on the part indicating the answer. Go Yohan’s gaze, which had been drawing lines all over the problem, moved to my fingertip.

“Even if it’s hard, you can definitely do it. You just need to avoid the traps.”

Go Yohan frowned one eyebrow again. This time, he tilted his head slightly and alternated between looking at the part I pointed to and the problem. His eyes, which had been moving slightly as he read the text, suddenly stopped. Go Yohan’s face became serious. The pen, which had been aimlessly drawing lines, poked the workbook. It was the part where Go Yohan had been struggling with the problem. Go Yohan hesitated and then marked a number. And then he slightly raised his eyes and looked at me. As if asking for permission.

“……Number 3?”

I made a circle with my index finger and thumb. Go Yohan put his gaze inside the circle I made. On his gloomy and cold face, joy slowly spread like a blooming flower. It was just for a fleeting moment. I stared at that face as if enchanted. In that fleetingly blooming face, there was a joy I couldn’t ignore or pretend not to see. My instincts followed suit and smiled brightly. That smile soon disappeared.

When I came to my senses, I found myself helping Go Yohan with his incorrect answers, having completely rolled up my sleeves. By the time all of Go Yohan’s homework was finished, it was already 7 o’clock. And we rested our chins on the table, sharing trivial stories again. Most of the conversations were like this:

“Did you really study world history with distant Countries, neighboring countries?”

“Yeah.”

“And Korean history with 500 Years of Joseon Dynasty in Comics, really?”

“I told you. Why would I lie to you about that?”

“You lie quite often, actually. It’s almost a habit.”

“No, I don’t.”

Go Yohan frowned. I frowned back. Well, you are a real liar. That trivial competition ended when Go Yohan’s stomach rumbled.

“……”

“……”

I turned my eyes to the clock. 7:30. While I had eaten lunch late, it was naturally time for Go Yohan to be hungry.

“Aren’t you eating dinner?”

“Oh, I should.”

Go Yohan curled his lips inward. He looked troubled. Go Yohan alternated his gaze between me and the clock on the wall.

“Are you hungry?”

“I’m just okay.”

Of course, since I ate late, I wouldn’t be hungry. Go Yohan blinked his long eyes.

“Then I’ll eat later too.”

“But you’re hungry.”

“Since when have you been so interested in me?”

Go Yohan’s unusually large hand lightly tapped my arm. Indeed, since when did my interest in you grow so much? Perhaps it was autumn. I regretted my autumn and acted.

“The sound your stomach made earlier wasn’t something I could pretend not to hear.”

“You’re tactless.”

Go Yohan chided me. This time, his long, large hand tapped the back of my hand. He was tall, so his legs were long, his arms were long, and his hands were big. Then, a rather sexual thought suddenly came to mind. It was a thought that naturally occurred to an eighteen-year-old. They say if your hands are big and your nose is high, then that is also big. Park Dongcheol’s words suddenly came to mind.

‘Right. Go Yohan’s is bigger, isn’t it?’

Is Go Yohan really big? My gaze naturally drifted under the table.

“Hey. What are you looking at?”

Gasp. My eyes shot open. Go Yohan was looking at me with a serious face, propping his chin. My heart plummeted. Uh, uh. Words wouldn’t come out properly. Go Yohan’s eyebrows curved upwards.

“Are you looking at mine right now?”

“Lo-looking at what? I wasn’t looking!”

“You were looking so obviously, what do you mean you weren’t?”

“No. It’s your imagination. I wasn’t looking.”

Go Yohan’s eyebrows curved even more. Then he let out a dry laugh. Go Yohan pointed under the table with his finger and said:

“Imagination, you say? You were staring intensely at my stomach, weren’t you?”

Stomach?