Eighteen’s Bed Novel Completed - Chapter 154

It stung. It was because Go Yohan’s front tooth bit my upper lip. So I, too, quickly bit Go Yohan’s tongue, which was gently entering.

“Ah-ha.”

I meant to hurt him. When I lifted my eyelids, Go Yohan’s pupils were right in front of my eyes. When did he open his eyes? Then he must have seen me pathetically checking inside the store and the street. Shit.

I wrinkled my nose and closed one eye. As if winking. And I grabbed Go Yohan by the collar. I greedily bit and swallowed Go Yohan’s rapidly retreating lips, then let go as if throwing him away.

I clicked my tongue at Go Yohan, who was looking at me with a bewildered expression, like calling a dog. Huh. Go Yohan let out a hollow breath at my actions. Did you see that? I pushed my raised nose bridge towards Go Yohan. Then, maintaining the same posture of looking straight at Go Yohan, I only moved my hand. To snatch the already opened umbrella.

“This is mine.”

My umbrella snatching operation ended smoothly. I had already slung the umbrella over my shoulder and threw the unfolded umbrella to Go Yohan. Go Yohan easily caught it with his left hand. Seriously annoying.

“That’s yours.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

Go Yohan scanned the new umbrella. He had a face that clearly didn’t like it. It’s a new umbrella. What’s wrong with it? Just as I was about to ask, Go Yohan rubbed his fingers near his lips and said:

“I guess I worked really hard to make Jun’s stand up.”

Don’t people usually say ‘open’ an umbrella? Amidst the sound of pouring rain, I recalled Go Yohan’s habit of speech. He’s still the same even as he’s gotten older. And it’s still true that his way of speaking is subtly to my taste. I’ve gotten older too, but I’m still the same.

“And you almost made mine stand up.”

I shook my head slightly and waved my hand in the air. No need to think deeply. Hmm.

“Let’s go home.”

The monsoon was expected to be long.

As we returned, the rain intensified. The rain, which had been enough to soak our pants, poured down as if to shatter the windows. By the time we barely reached the apartment building, both Go Yohan and I were completely drenched.

Go Yohan and I couldn’t say a word even in front of the entrance. However, Go Yohan and I in the mirror secretly met each other’s eyes. A sensual breath mingled, and the rough scent of soap tickled me. Why did Go Yohan smell clean even after smoking? That was a thought I had while staring at Go Yohan in the mirror.

A tickle gently touched my neck.

“…”

A small shiver rose from below, stiffening my body. Go Yohan in the mirror was holding my collar with his fingers. My fine hairs stood on end. I couldn’t bring myself to turn my head and just looked down the hallway, saying:

“…Why?”

“Ah.”

Go Yohan left a long pause, then continued.

“Your collar was folded.”

Then he brushed my nape sideways with his wet, damp middle finger. That small gesture captivated me. Unable to move an inch, yet with only my mouth alive, I said somewhat stiffly:

“I checked before I came out.”

“Must have folded while you were running.”

“…”

“Aren’t you going to say thank you?”

His fingers gently scratched the closely trimmed hair at the back of my head. The tickle moved from my neck downwards. I suppressed my muffled breath and bowed my head deeply.

“Thank you.”

My footsteps were already moving towards the door.

“It’s a lie.”

“…What is?”

“About the collar. Actually, it wasn’t folded.”

“…”

“I was teasing you, idiot.”

Is he kidding me? Seriously. Only then did I turn around and glare at Go Yohan. And in a fleeting moment, I swallowed dryly. Through Go Yohan’s drenched clothes, his pale skin was visible. At the same time, my core began to ache.

I shouldn’t have looked.

Kang Jun is truly crazy. I suppressed the urge to hit my head with my fist and quickly opened the entrance door. As soon as the door opened, I shoved only my body inside the house before Go Yohan could enter, then closed it again. After a long silence, I heard a knock on the inner door.

Knock-knock.

Go Yohan’s broad shoulders, faintly visible through the glass, were there.

As soon as the sensor light came on, I frantically ran into my room. My wet soles were slippery. The squelching dampness clung to my feet, following me. The stickiness hidden beneath my soles merely hid like a shadow, it didn’t disappear.

However, I straightened my body as if nothing was wrong and entered the room. Though, contrary to that triumphant air, I let out a long sigh as soon as I entered the room.

I subtly pressed my ear to the door. I heard the sound of a door closing somewhere far away. Only then did I collapse, my shoulder against the door.

“Shit.”

A guilty conscience needs no accuser. Because I had been having lewd thoughts about Go Yohan. It’s a bit regrettable for Go Yohan. But what can I do? I’m just this suspicious and pathetic guy.

Feeling relieved, a new sight caught my eye. Like crumpled papers strewn across the desk.

“So dirty, seriously.”

I sighed and got up again, snatching the paper trash scattered on the desk. And I despaired, seeing the overflowing trash can. If I had known this, I would have asked the landlady to clean my room too.

No, wait. What if she found traces of me sleeping with Go Yohan? What if she found condoms?

“…”

Ah, I’m really lewd. While pretending not to be with Go Yohan, I ended up leaving the poorly done room cleaning to myself. In return, I slept with Go Yohan. Honestly, I tried to live cleanly too, but sometimes I just forget the very concept of having to organize something. I really am a household waste that can’t even sort recycling.

Go Yohan’s words from a long time ago came back to me vividly.

…Go Yohan was better than me, after all. He scolds my patheticness. I crammed the papers into the bag in the trash can, as if taking out my frustration.

I hit my head hard with my palm. Then, emptying my mind, I crammed more papers onto the overflowing bag. After clearing a few bundles of paper from the desk, the bag overflowed. I scratched my forehead, watching the papers fall out of the bag onto the floor. Then I raised my head and looked at the quiet door.

Perhaps I stood there for about three minutes? I ended my unconscious deliberation and bent down. Still looking at the door, I picked up the paper trash and stood up. Still, there was no sound outside.

I moved my feet forward a few times, then backward, then grabbed the doorknob. Honestly, I had a bit of defiance. This is my house. Whose eyes am I watching anyway? So I opened the door.

“Oh.”

And by chance, I awkwardly met Go Yohan’s eyes, standing idly in the kitchen. And Go Yohan, standing there with only the auxiliary light on. He didn’t seem to be eating or drinking anything in particular. My defiance didn’t stop. I asked brazenly, pretending to be a truly clean and innocent person:

“What are you doing so quietly? I thought you went into your room.”

“Hmm.”

Go Yohan seemed to be thinking something, then slowly traced the wall with his right index finger. It took a moment for his words to follow.

“Going to drink water.”

“…The water dispenser is on the other side.”

“Right. Oh, right.”

Go Yohan made a dull sound and just smiled awkwardly.

“…”

“You? Going to throw out trash?”

“Ah, yeah. It’s full.”

“Then, you’ll have to pass through here.”

“…I guess so.”

To go to the mini-kitchen, there’s a trash can that the landlady is in charge of. To use that trash can, I first have to pass through the kitchen. And at the entrance of the kitchen is Go Yohan. Conclusion. I have to pass Go Yohan.

My hand, holding the bundle of papers, gradually tightened. I cleared my throat inwardly and stiffly lifted my head, pretending nothing was wrong. Well, brazenness is my greatest talent, after all. So I walked towards the mini-kitchen.

As my steps drew closer to Go Yohan, my heartbeat became sharper and more acute, scattering fragments as if hammering my glass body, and grew deafeningly loud, piercing my ears.

“I’m coming through.”

Go Yohan said he was going to drink water, but he didn’t move at all as I approached. Instead, he subtly turned his back, entering my path. What is he planning? Tension grabbed me by the nape of my neck.

As I forced myself to look straight ahead, Go Yohan’s expression blurred at the edge of my vision. He lowered his eyes and slowly, explicitly, scanned me up and down. I felt a feeling akin to the shame of being completely naked. It was the moment a sense of crisis stroked my ankles.

“Can I help you?”

A heavily suppressed voice spoke to me. Crazy.

“No, it’s fine.”

I shook my head, pretending not to feel any atmosphere, and smiled awkwardly. My body stiffly turned and entered the mini-kitchen. Somehow, I felt like I had less spirit than in high school. When I was younger, I think I used to act recklessly in such atmospheres. But after having sex, it only became more uncomfortable.

So, it’s the difference between a bastard you only vaguely imagined and a bastard you actually did it with.

Even after confirming the door was definitely closed, I felt uneasy about my back. It felt like Go Yohan was plastered to my back. I felt as if he had followed me. Still, seeing the closed door, I felt relieved. I thought Go Yohan would have gone to drink water since I had left. Relieved, I was about to throw the bundle of trash onto the pile.

…But my hand suddenly stopped.

‘Can I help you?’

It was a question that had already passed. But I had deliberately ignored it earlier, only to answer it in a place where no one was.

“Helping me throw away just one bag.”

And then I moved my stopped hand again.

I looked at the trash can, where various garbage was mixed. The tension, as if something was about to happen, made me unconsciously flick my fingertips. I stared at the paper, full of coffee stains, for a long time, then turned my body. As I was about to go back out to the kitchen, I stopped abruptly at the doorway.

He’s not still waiting, is he?

How useless. I was fretting over such useless reasons. It doesn’t matter if he’s outside or not. Even knowing that, Go Yohan’s presence makes people uncomfortable. And I can guarantee that among the people I know, not a single one is comfortable with Go Yohan. Especially since I even have such lewd thoughts about Go Yohan.

Still, I can’t stay here forever. Besides, it would look more pathetic if I went in and didn’t come out. It would look stranger. I clenched and unclenched my fingers tightly. My stiff fingers rested on the sliding door handle. I gathered my courage and opened the door a fingernail’s width; no one was there.

“…”

A strange feeling held my ankles. Was it regret? Or relief? Sometimes, I don’t know my own heart. Why Kang Jun, who only lived with certainty just a year ago, became like this.

I walked briskly into my room, gripping my hair tightly. It was quite a placid stride. However, once in the room, I took off my clothes and underwear with somewhat frantic movements and threw them on the floor. It seemed I needed to pour cold water on my head.

“Please, let’s get a grip.”

Getting all giddy over pranks meant only to tease me. I lightly slapped my cheek with my palm. After that, I went into the shower room next to my room and immediately turned on the water. But as soon as I opened the tap, hot water poured from the showerhead attached to the wall, hitting my head and shoulders fiercely. Because of that, I unconsciously let out a sound.

“Ah, hot!”

I quickly closed my mouth, though, because the sound I made was so pathetic.

I ran my hand over my reddened skin as soon as the water touched it. I almost got scalded. Everything I had been doing, from earlier until now, was childish and mortifying. I lightly knocked my head against the tiles. Thinking it was fortunate no one saw, I cautiously stepped into the pouring water this time.

I pushed my soaking wet hair back and washed my face with the pouring water. Feeling the water stream hitting my face a little painfully, I felt my mind returning. It sounded just like a waterfall. Though this wasn’t really a waterfall. This time, I wiped the water flowing down my chin with my palm.

That’s when it happened.

I heard someone knocking on the door amidst the water stream. No, I thought I heard it.

“Who, Go Yohan?”

I asked who, then realized the stupidity of my question and hastily changed it to his name. I asked, but there was no sound. Did I not hear it properly because of the sound of the water? Or did I mishear the sound of water falling?

First, I didn’t take my eyes off the door and slowly turned off the tap. The fiercely falling water gradually became faint droplets, dripping onto the floor. A faint mist filled the air, and in the tightly sealed bathroom, the sound of water droplets spread strangely. I stood there blankly under the showerhead, but still, there was no answer.

“Go Yohan, is that you?”

I called Go Yohan’s name, wondering. And suddenly, a small question popped into my head.

But did I lock the door when I came in?

“…”

The nerves, taut like a pulled string, finally pulled the trigger. It was probably instinct. Like the intuition, weak prey animals develop to avoid predators.

I carefully muffled my footsteps and came out of the shower booth. Then I almost lost my balance and stumbled because of my wet feet. There was no time to hesitate, thinking, ‘No way, it can’t be.’ I desperately reached out to get there as quickly as possible and locked the door. It happened in an instant.

Hah— Even though it wasn’t something that should exhaust me, ragged breaths escaped.

And as my breathing calmed, heat rose in embarrassment. Only then did I realize how paranoid my actions had been.

I gave a bitter laugh. I don’t know when this sensitivity sickness will ever heal. Is this also just my nature? I shivered slightly, feeling my body grow cold from the chilled air. Just as I was about to let go of the doorknob again.

Creak.

The doorknob, which I was holding lightly, was turning with only the slightest sound.

“…”

My body instantly stiffened like a statue. It was moving at a cautious speed, so slow that I might not have noticed if my hand wasn’t on it. The flesh of my finger, that small protruding lump of flesh, was tickled by the tiny movement.

I couldn’t even blink.

The moment I slowly removed my trembling hand from the doorknob, making sure it wasn’t obvious from the other side, the doorknob made a thunk sound as it turned all the way and returned to its original position.

And after that, it was quiet.

I just stood under the water for a long time. Just when I thought I might become a new Buddha enlightened under a waterfall, I turned off the tap. My body was already swollen. My skin was, as expected, flushed red. Suddenly, my head felt dizzy, and I grabbed it with my hand. I believed that every part of my skin felt warm because I had been under the hot water for too long.

Go Yohan during sex pushes a person almost to death. He doesn’t listen when told not to, and I’ve never heard him stop when told to. That night will probably never be erased from my life.

“Please, stop remembering it, you stupid bastard…”

I tore at my wet hair, scolding myself, but it all ended in vain. Because the Kang Jun deep inside was crying and aroused while being fucked by Go Yohan.

‘Please, please now, now st-stop. Stop it. Please, pl-please. Please…’

It was a night where I was exhausted from crying and passed out, and even after waking up with a blurry mind, I had to give up everything when I realized my body was still accepting Go Yohan. In the end, I had to bury my face in the blanket I had pulled over myself. I couldn’t put any more strength into my body, and I was afraid disgusting moans would come out of my loose mouth.

And yet, sometimes I vividly dream of that night. And after the dream, I had to see my pants all wet.

‘Jun-ah, please?’

‘…’

The words Go Yohan said echoed, from when I desperately nodded and clenched my hands tightly.

‘I’ll only pull out if you relax your hole.’

Who was it that kept pushing in and pulling out, never letting go, even when I had no strength left to even raise my knees, lying collapsed on the bed? Why was he shifting the blame to me? My bottom was so loose that I could feel my inner flesh following along every time Go Yohan slowly pulled his penis out.

‘Jun-ah, do you love me a lot?’

‘…Ugh, yeah. Yeah. I love you. I love you. So please, please.’

At first, it was somewhat romantic, but the end was closer to a wail. I want to sleep. I want to wash. My stomach hurts so much, and my bottom feels all swollen. To the words I screamed, just wanting it to end, Go Yohan seemed to lose his mind instead. He smiled innocently like a boy who had heard a love confession and said:

‘Then show me your face and do it. Huh?’

Shit— My firmly held waist suddenly lifted, and my breath, which had been muffled by the blanket, instantly became ragged. Pieces of the blanket slipped through my fingers, and I saw the wall.

When I came to my senses, I was sitting on Go Yohan’s lap, being fucked. Every time Go Yohan thrust hard from below, my whole body shook. I had nothing to cover my face with, so I bit my lip and lowered my head. Then Go Yohan would shove his penis so deep that my internal organs felt pushed up.

‘Turn your head. Turn your head towards me. I want to see your face, Jun-ah.’

‘…Ugh, h-huh. Pl-please…’

And so, Go Yohan crushed me, who desperately wanted to maintain at least my dignity as a man.

The thought I definitely had while shaking was, ‘I will never sleep with Go Yohan again.’ Crazy, isn’t Kang Jun the real trashy pervert?