Eighteen’s Bed Novel Completed - Chapter 148

His breath, hot enough to scald me, melted my neck. I frantically reached out and grabbed Go Yohan’s hair. Desperate to escape the unbearable pain, I pulled at his hair with all my might. A long silver thread stretched from Go Yohan’s mouth as his head was pulled back.

“Haa.”

His eyes, looking down at me with his head tilted back, were truly a Go Yohan I had never seen before.

“…”

If I had to compare it, what would it be like? Those eyes I first met in the cafeteria. Snake-like eyes. That was it.

“Sorry for hurting you.”

His pupils moved slowly. Small pupils and light irises. That gaze, moving like a predator, gradually lowered. Then, his terrifyingly expressionless face filled with a strange sensuality. Go Yohan’s lips twisted up on one side. His face, which seemed surprisingly pleased, slowly opened his mouth.

“Jun-ah, but why are you…”

“…”

“Why are you so…”

His gaze landed on my exposed chest. To be precise, on the subtly hardened parts, whether from sexual arousal or from being completely exposed and scared. Fuck, I hurriedly grabbed my T-shirt to pull it down, but it was held so firmly that it just hung there shabbily. The sight of it caught on Go Yohan’s single thumb, refusing to go down. I was on the verge of dying from indignation watching it, when Go Yohan licked his lips and said,

“Do you usually look at the color of your nipples and thank your parents?”

“Why would I do that, you fucking bastard? I’ve never even seen them!”

“Why wouldn’t you?”

Suddenly, Go Yohan frowned and spoke seriously, as if he genuinely couldn’t understand.

“Why wouldn’t you look at something this pretty? It’s a waste.”

Go Yohan was crazy. Truly crazy. My face burned, and all I could think was that if I had a brick in my hand right now, I’d smash his head in.

“If it were me, I’d take pictures and exhibit them.”

The fact that he said such things with a serious expression, annoyingly, made me even angrier. I couldn’t take it anymore. From then on, even if I died, I’d kill him first. At that thought, my trembling fists clenched. Then, with all my might, I struck the space between Go Yohan’s chest and collarbone.

“Kkheueut.”

As soon as he was hit, the body that had been sprawled on top of me collapsed. His right hand, which had been supporting his posture, loosened, and his left hand, which had been pulling up my clothes, grabbed his chest where it had been hit and he fell onto me. Then he buried his head on my chest and groaned. I was the one who was surprised.

“Go-Go Yohan?”

“Augh… Ah, it hurts…”

I’d heard that was a vital spot, but was it really? I looked back and forth between my fist and Go Yohan’s head, flustered. Feeling like I’d hit him too hard, I released the hair I’d gripped tightly. I let go and tried to lift his head to check.

“…Euhk!”

A thick, hot mass of flesh touched that part of my chest I had never touched in my life. The protruding nipple was crushed with force, and the sensation of it bouncing made me involuntarily twist my waist. The hand that had been gripping his own chest had now moved down and gripped my waist tightly. I caught a glimpse of his body, only his shoulders rising, as he buried his head in my right breast. Amidst my spiraling mind…

I quickly put my hand between my chest and Go Yohan’s forehead and pushed. Again, a tense battle of nerves ensued. The sound of him burying his head and licking and sucking my skin reverberated starkly.

“Go-Go Yohan. Please. Yohan ah.”

Ugh, I desperately swallowed the moan that threatened to escape. Nothing would be more humiliating than letting a moan slip from my lips. As I forcibly tensed my neck, my face flushed again. Both Go Yohan’s head and my arm trembled. It was an evenly matched struggle. Until Go Yohan lightly bit the protruding nipple with his teeth.

“Heut!”

All my strength drained away. My hips involuntarily lifted once and then rose, and my toes scratched the blanket. A suffocating pressure gathered in my core, which had died from pain. A pleasure that couldn’t be suppressed by reason swarmed up my legs, tearing at my remaining noble sanity.

So this is what it meant for my mind to go numb.

I thought that as I watched my vision blur with welling tears.

That’s when I missed my timing. The momentum instantly shifted to Go Yohan’s side. I felt my left leg being lifted while I was momentarily out of it, but then the storm raged again, and I could only arch my back and gasp. I didn’t even know if it was a good feeling or a painful one.

Even amidst that, I covered my mouth, afraid I might scream, but my strength gave out again and my fingers slipped. A few fingers brushed my cheek, scraping traces of the hardened liquid on the surface. When the hot force sucked, bit, and bounced, I twisted the blanket with my toes in response. Even in my dazed state, my last shred of pride, wanting to maintain my sanity, pushed Go Yohan away.

Finally, sanity won.

“Haa, haa…”

Go Yohan, who had been breathing roughly as if he’d been running, as if he’d been suffocating, wiped his subtly swollen lips with the back of his hand. The talkative Go Yohan said nothing. He just quietly looked at the marks he had bitten. Even though I had pushed Go Yohan away, I was tormented by the saliva he had left behind. The wind cooled the saliva, sharply scratching the swollen nipple.

“You’re crying again.”

“…”

Go Yohan, who had been pushed aside, covered his mouth with his arm and said,

“Shall I do the other side too?”

I curled my toes, putting strength into them, and feigned indifference with my voice.

“No.”

“Why?”

“Because if you do more, yours might burst.”

At least I wasn’t the only one trembling like this. It was funny that I was saying that with an erection, but I thought it was fine as long as he didn’t notice. When Go Yohan turned his head to look at my lower body, I quickly pulled his wrist. Go Yohan looked at my face, then at his left thigh, and continued.

“It’s okay. I already came once.”

“…”

Only then did I see the clearly wet stain in the darkness. Around the middle of Go Yohan’s thigh.

“Though it got hard again while I was sucking yours.”

“…Are you crazy? Really.”

It seemed the high school rumors were true. Go Yohan was a monster. They said if it’s really big, it doesn’t show when it’s hard. To think I’d get to confirm that truth like this. As I scoffed in disbelief, I trembled from the faint pleasure that slowly returned.

“It’s okay. You’re not that small either.”

“…Hey.”

“Hm?”

I called out to him, then swallowed my words again. Even in that brief moment, my head spun so much; it was the first time I’d felt motion sickness from thinking. My tense fingertips scratched the blanket. A soft sensation dragged across my thin skin. I swallowed my resolve.

“You really…”

But it didn’t come out properly. I swallowed air, grabbed the blanket again, squeezed my eyes shut, then opened them. I expected it, I felt it. It was too late to change the course of my life. I’d already had quasi-sex. There was no turning back. I had been prepared for this day to come. So I expected Go Yohan to go all the way today.

My resolve was already made when I saw Go Yohan’s back. Go Yohan doesn’t know it, but the real pervert is me.

“…Go Yohan.”

“Yeah.”

A faint, throaty answer came. It was proof that Go Yohan was aroused. I moistened my dry lips.

“Are you going to do it?”

“…”

No answer. He said he wouldn’t put it in earlier. Damn it. I bit my lip and relaxed my body. As long as I saw Go Yohan’s back, I couldn’t help but be weak to him. I squeezed and released the blanket, then spoke softly.

“If you’re going to, then take it off.”

But his beautiful, melancholy face twisted.

“No.”

“Why?”

“…”

“…Are you embarrassed?”

The sound of the blanket rubbing against his body was heard. Go Yohan raised one eyebrow and also sat up. Kneeling on the blanket, Go Yohan avoided my gaze. His face was clearly uncomfortable. I persistently followed his gaze as he avoided me. Go Yohan seemed to feel it too, and this time he lowered his head.

“You stripped me completely, dressed me like Winnie the Pooh with only a top, and now you won’t take yours off?”

“It’s no use saying funny things.”

I was serious though.

“I won’t take it off.”

Go Yohan had an exceptional talent for acting pitifully. I knew it better now, having experienced it once. But his true talent was that even knowing, my heart softened. His voice, growing softer, twisted and squeezed my heart. A heavy stone pressed down on the center of my chest. I gripped the blanket hard, then released it. Avoid Go Yohan as much as possible.

“Then I won’t do it.”

In my words, the blanket rustled and moved.

“…What?”

Ha. With my head turned away, I let out a silent laugh. Honestly, I laughed because it was funny. From making a pitiful voice to raising his head with a curious one, it was a little cute, if anything. You bastard, he knows exactly what’s good, like a ghost.

“Go Yohan.”

“Yeah.”

“…”

Now, someone was pounding on my chest as if to kill me. Thumping, so painful, agonizing, yet a heat strong enough to endure that pain held me.

“…You know what?”

“…Uh.”

“That is…”

The words were swallowed again.

I could take back my words now. I could turn back. But my conviction was blocked by a question that resurfaced. How would I turn back? To where? I knew. In fact, I had known. I also knew the futility of not speaking the word that evoked the act. I needed time and motivation. The courage to abandon the path I had craved my whole life. Now, the pain of a knife carving into my chest came. Choices are always difficult. Even more so when it’s a choice that could overturn your life.

But there was someone who made this choice before me. And he was right next to me. A foolish bastard who carried an indelible scar, and was ashamed of it, yet didn’t resent me. I took a deep breath. My flat chest rose. I exhaled the complex thoughts with my breath.

“…Go Yohan, actually, I was too embarrassed to tell you this before.”

The words I was about to say were already etched in my mind. At the same time, my head grew hot. I must have turned red again. I twisted my head hard, not wanting to reveal my pathetic state. My body turned outwards and was propped on its side, my face buried in the blanket. My lips, half-pressed into the blanket, finally parted.

“I get turned on when I see your scars.”

My first confession in life ended so shabbily on the blanket. And I wasn’t even fully undressed, my T-shirt was pulled up to my neck. It was also a comfort. A comfort that his scars weren’t that ugly. In fact, they were a little sexy…

“So…”

Please… My voice was so small it was barely audible even to myself. Damn it. As expected, the first time is always shitty. At least when I first met Go Yohan, I never thought it would come to this. Would I have known that I would confess to Go Yohan and agonize over solving Go Yohan’s first experience?

Well, if I had known this would happen, I would have transferred schools when I was seventeen. But why no answer? Damn it, did he wake up? Did he think I was a weirdo? I’m going crazy. My mind was spinning, and my erection, which had been painfully hard, slowly subsided again. Should I make an excuse again? Should I explain properly? I just wanted to say it wasn’t his embarrassment. Right, let’s just say no for now.

“Hey! That’s not it!”

But my resolve was flung far away somewhere as the bed shook. The sound of feet hitting the floor was heard. I sat up in surprise. My T-shirt, caught on my neck, awkwardly fell to just below my chest.

“Go Yohan?”

Go Yohan, standing in the darkness, quickly unbuckled his pants. The half-open zipper was clearly visible. My heart pounded again. This time it didn’t hurt, nor was it agonizing, but I felt suffocated. Go Yohan crossed his hands, grabbed the hem of his shirt, and lifted it. His well-defined abs and the subtly rippling muscles near his sides were instantly visible. Go Yohan’s head emerged through the small opening. As his clothes brushed, his back hair ruffled.

“…Hey.”

“?”

There was no trace of a smile on Go Yohan’s face. Only his flushed eyes. I looked at Go Yohan’s upper body, half-hanging off the bed, and his body, and spoke in disbelief.

“Did you… work out?”

“…Yeah.”

“When?”

There was no answer. Go Yohan bit his lip, fully lowered his zipper, and took off his pants. He raised his hand again and pinched the half-removed underwear between his thumb and forefinger. The black boxers clung to his flat muscles as they slid down. When Go Yohan lifted his hips, the heavy presence in the center thudded down.

“Usually, just. When I have nothing to do or don’t want to think about anything…”

His penis, engorged with veins, dripped liquid as it rose, then fell, unable to bear its own weight. The sight of it bobbing like a living creature presented me with two emotions.

“…”

Fear and an inexplicable sexual tension. Go Yohan chewed his lip and touched his bangs, then moved his leg to open the drawer of the nightstand near the bed. The first drawer contained a box of condoms. When he picked one up, I was startled by the large number of packets that came with it. I was speechless.

“I bought these just in case I might need them.”

“Uh, uh.”

I answered without really hearing what he was saying. I couldn’t collect myself amidst the endless array of condoms.

“…Shall we use them?”

Go Yohan hesitated and straightened his back. Every time his well-built body moved, I could clearly see a red desire rising and falling. Even though his penis, swollen with lust, erected and rose, it couldn’t overcome its original weight and fell back down again. It kept repeating that. His penis, glistening with fluid in the faint light, shimmered. At that moment, I genuinely wanted to say, ‘No.’

“I have this too.”

As if a shop owner was offering a bonus, he held out a cylindrical container with a dizzying design. Even without reading it, I knew the identity of the liquid inside. My mind grew paler and paler.

“…When did you buy something like that?”

“Just, my size isn’t sold at convenience stores.”

Go Yohan put his index finger in his mouth and lightly bit it with his teeth. What was that? That fake, embarrassed smile.

“If I’m going to prepare, shouldn’t I prepare in advance? What if Jun loses his virginity without a condom? I worried about that, so I bought them in advance. This is just for good measure.”