Eighteen’s Bed Novel Completed - Chapter 11

This was one of Go Yohan’s traits; he often abruptly switched topics he was talking about. It was a truly bad habit.

Go Yohan stopped talking and put the plastic spoon in his mouth. I lifted my head from the ice cream tub and looked at Go Yohan. Go Yohan sucked on the spoon, then scooped a full spoonful of ice cream and put it back in his mouth. Go Yohan, rolling the ice cream around in his mouth, waved the spoon in the air.

“He didn’t come at lunchtime yesterday, and then when I saw Han Taesan coming to get his bag after class, his face was all red. Ugh. So cruel. You bailed on me. Han Junwoo is doing weird things. Those bastards ran like pigs to eat lunch. I was eating tteokbokki outside all alone like an outcast.”

So he means he went out alone during lunchtime and even ate tteokbokki. And yet, his voice sounded quite wronged when he complained, which was absurd.

“Han Junwoo hit Han Taesan?”

“Yeah. Again.”

Go Yohan said it, but his tone showed no concern at all.

At that moment, I honestly felt a little relieved. The sense of relief that I wasn’t the only one who got hit washed over me like a tide. It felt a little like schadenfreude too.

Moreover, thinking of Han Junwoo, who caused such a situation and still resorted to violence, made him seem so pathetic, and his stupidity even felt fortunate. Listening to Go Yohan’s words, the suffocating feeling I had been carrying finally seemed to ease a bit.

“Is it funny?”

“No. What’s funny about Han Taesan getting hit?”

“You were laughing.”

“I didn’t laugh.”

“You did? What’s wrong with you? You’re mean. Laughing at someone getting hit, and bailing on me too.”

“Stop saying ‘bailed out.’ You should skip too then.”

“That’s crazy talk. If my grades and attendance are bad, I might as well end my life.”

I finally couldn’t hold back my laughter at Go Yohan’s last remark.

“Honestly, that last part was funny, right?”

I shook my head at Go Yohan, who was laughing and seeking my agreement.

“That’s not true. Your grades aren’t bad.”

“Wow. There’s someone who knows my grades. Grades even my parents don’t know.”

“Are you touched?”

“Yeah. I almost cried. Tears welled up in the corners of my eyes just now. See? How moist they are.”

I leaned in and looked at Go Yohan’s eyes. Unlike his appearance, his eyelashes were long and dense. They were so long and tangled that far from looking moist, they seemed dry, perhaps due to Go Yohan’s naturally cold impression.

“No, I don’t see anything at all.”

“What? You’re really too heartless.”

Go Yohan, who had been squinting his eyes and showing off his eyelashes, pouted his lower lip, showing he was sulking.

“Still, I didn’t know our Jun was so interested in me.”

Go Yohan spoke in that sarcastic tone again.

“And I didn’t know you cared about me enough to come all the way to my distant house on your own two feet.”

His tone bothered me, so I retorted, but Go Yohan, who received the remark, just tapped his cheek with the finger that had been propping up his chin. When his fingers, which had been tapping rapidly like raindrops from his index to his pinky, had repeated a dozen times, Go Yohan finally spoke.

“This one hurts a bit.”

“What?”

Go Yohan tried to put on a sad, detestable expression that didn’t quite suit him, then suddenly said,

“Give me your hand.”

So I held out my right hand in front of Go Yohan, and he placed one finger on my hand. The problem was that he didn’t place all five fingers, but only his middle finger.

“Eat shit.”

“Ah, seriously, this…”

After doing such pathetic things, and after finishing the ice cream, Go Yohan, who had been nagging me to come to school tomorrow because it was boring, finally seemed tired and showed signs of fatigue. Just when I wished he would leave, he was already brazenly lying on my bed, taking a nap.

“…When did he even get up there?”

I was about to wake up the unruly Go Yohan when I suddenly saw his sleeping face, and I just sat on the sofa near the bed, passing the time. It seemed better not to wake him. I didn’t like it, but I decided to consider it a payment for him looking after me.

Go Yohan woke up after two hours. As soon as he opened his eyes, he sprang up, mumbled a strange excuse about needing to watch a drama, and scurried back home. He was still a guy whose thoughts I couldn’t understand.

After sending Go Yohan off in a daze, I put a lot of medicine on my face and lay in bed.

Even if my cheek didn’t heal, I felt like I could go to school tomorrow.

I don’t know if God helped me or if it was purely the power of the medicine. When I woke up in the morning, my cheek was quite settled down. There was still a slight swelling and a bluish tint, but it was at a level where it could pass as “just a minor bump or injury.”

I went to school with a willing heart. However, the classroom, in contrast, was gloomy. It was because of Han Junwoo.

I instinctively looked for Han Taesan. He arrived at school just barely before 1st period began, narrowly avoiding being late.

“…”

The moment I saw Han Taesan’s face, I was so surprised that I forgot to close my eyes. His face was a sight to behold, so much so that I felt sorry for having wished he had been hit like me. His lips were all busted, and one eye was swollen as big as my cheek. For a moment, a heavy sense of guilt choked me. I was displeased with myself for having such childish thoughts.

“This crazy…”

Han Taesan, who had entered the classroom, looked around nervously, then saw my seat, and our eyes met by chance. Han Taesan stared at me for a long time, then suddenly his expression hardened as if he realized he had forgotten something. He stopped his approaching steps, sharply turned his head, and sat down.

“…What.”

His puzzling gesture gave me a strange feeling. Unconsciously, I subtly scanned my surroundings. The reason was immediately clear. Han Junwoo was glaring at me as if he wanted to kill me.

“Ah, damn it.”

Maybe I shouldn’t have come. Regret washed over me.

After that, Han Taesan, who used to act friendly towards me, didn’t try to talk to me even during break time, and even at lunchtime, Han Junwoo and Han Taesan disappeared somewhere together.

Left alone, I ate with Go Yohan. I desperately wanted to go out and find them both, but I knew well that despite thinking that, I wouldn’t actually be able to do it.

Surely he wouldn’t hit Han Taesan, would he? It wasn’t my place to worry, but seeing his face, it was hard not to worry. On the contrary, Go Yohan, who seemed carefree, bluffed that he felt much better now.

“See? It was that brutal. I almost choked.”

“You ate ice cream just fine yesterday.”

“Just say I sucked it well.”

Go Yohan winked and smiled.

“Because you suck ice cream.”

At his joke, I lightly kicked Go Yohan’s shin, stopping mid-meal. Go Yohan chuckled and scratched his chin. He seemed somewhat embarrassed, for some reason. That couldn’t be.

Life is unpredictable. From our first meeting, I had no intention of becoming close with Go Yohan, and I even disliked him. Yet now, the person I’m closest to is Go Yohan.

His endlessly light attitude and tone prevent me from getting deeply immersed in the situation.

There were times I resented Go Yohan, hating him for always being lighthearted and never serious, but now, because of that very aspect, I can endure with some composure. Though, if Han Junwoo and I had remained close all along, it would have been a completely different story.

After that day, Han Junwoo would sometimes separate from his group and disappear somewhere with Han Taesan, and other times he would take some of them along and disappear. Among them, there were some who shook their heads with reluctance, refusing to follow.

In particular, Park Dongcheol, perhaps trying to escape the school disciplinary teacher, ran into me while climbing over the wall. What I heard then was that Han Junwoo told them to hit Han Taesan once each. When I frowned in disbelief, Park Dongcheol said he felt a bit that way too, and that he was avoiding it these days, and that he was currently going to the PC room with Choi Juhwan, so as not to misunderstand, and then he disappeared with a light tone.

Choi Juhwan was a guy who was close with Han Junwoo in first grade but had become a bit distant since they were in different classes now.

At lunchtime, I went to the playground and ate ice cream bought from the snack bar with Go Yohan. The cold coolness that touched my tongue spread with a tingling sensation. Unlike the refreshing ice cream, a bitter, knotted pain was squeezing my heart, but I was enduring it with composure.

“Is that good?”

“Want a bite?”

Go Yohan, who was chewing his fancy ice cream, drooled as he looked at mine. Seeing that, I half-jokingly put my saliva-laden ice cream near Go Yohan’s mouth, and he, as was his habit, always curled up one side of his lip and bit into it completely in one go.

“Ah! You actually ate it?”

“You told me to.”

“Gross… and why did you eat so much?”

“It was just one bite?”

It was just one bite. Go Yohan chuckled and shrugged one shoulder. It was truly peaceful. Unlike my troubled heart, the autumn weather was clear.

Where could Han Junwoo and Han Taesan be now? A few places where they might be came to mind, but I didn’t go looking for them. Perhaps Han Junwoo and Han Taesan really were there. Knowing that fact, I couldn’t go.

I was so distressed that I tried hard not to think about Han Junwoo. Then, it suddenly occurred to me that trying this hard showed how much I usually thought about Han Junwoo.

I don’t know how much time needs to pass, how much effort I need to put in, for this thought to fade like newspaper ink that has evaporated, for me to stop loving you. It felt like being stranded in an endless desert, and instead of being sad and frustrated, it was scary and painful.

So sometimes I retreat. Like Ostung Blue, struggling to see the footprints behind him. And sometimes, when I was in pain, I would talk to Go Yohan, and, well, that’s how it was.

Suddenly, I asked Go Yohan.

“Hey, Go Yohan.”

“What.”

“…Will flowers ever bloom in a desolate desert?”

It was such a sentimental remark that even I, who spoke it, was embarrassed and scratched my head. But Go Yohan didn’t tease me.

“They will.”

“…”

“Otherwise, it wouldn’t do. Life’s already annoying enough.”

When I heard those words, which I never thought would come from Go Yohan’s mouth, I knew that all this struggling for hope was useless. How much time would have to pass for me to give up this useless heart?

“…Yeah. It’s annoying.”

Han Junwoo. This apricot-like bastard. Why does he try to kill me, a loyal dog who wags his tail whenever he sees you? Han Junwoo now came and went from school as he pleased, as if he had given up all the promises a teenager should keep. And Han Taesan was always by his side.

As the situation became suspiciously out of hand, the classroom buzzed with unease and curiosity. I felt it again. Han Junwoo’s violence was becoming excessive, and the bad feelings about Han Junwoo, who was going too far, were spreading like a fog in the classroom—all of it was bad.

So when I encountered Han Junwoo, who was holding Han Taesan’s wrist and dragging him down the hallway, I stood there, looking back and forth between Han Junwoo and Han Taesan, and said,

“Your father is worried.”

It was a lie, neither an apology nor flattery. That was the limit of my pride. But Han Junwoo wasn’t close to his father. He probably wouldn’t know it was a lie. Even if he did, I could just say that if he kept acting this way, his father would eventually worry a lot.

This is how I always create an escape route.

“If you’re going to cause trouble, only you should suffer. What did Han Taesan do wrong?”

“Move.”

When I inserted Han Taesan’s name into the conversation, Han Junwoo finally glared at me. My chest felt suffocatingly tight. Because I hated Han Junwoo. And the pathetic, annoying Han Taesan clung to Han Junwoo’s side, looking at me with eyes that seemed about to cry.

“If you don’t want to get beaten to death like last time, move.”

“Jun, Junwoo.”

Like last time. Those words choked my chest. As Han Taesan stammered urgently, calling Han Junwoo’s name, he finally stopped talking. His gaze was solely on Han Taesan. I only saw the back of Han Junwoo’s head as he turned away from me.

“Th-that, ah, your father is worried.”

“…”

Han Taesan, with tears in his eyes, blocked Han Junwoo. How painful that pathetic melodrama was to me. It was so painful that I closed my eyes. Han Junwoo looked at Han Taesan like that, then turned and went into the classroom. And Han Junwoo stayed in the classroom all day that day, just like weeks ago.

The day of the field trip, which had been talked about for a while, arrived. It was about renting a bus for a day and going to some exhibition. Some kids grumbled about taking busy second-year high school students somewhere, but most were happy to escape school for a day.

Since we’d be back soon, there was no need to pack food, and the teachers only gave a few pieces of advice to the kids.

It wasn’t like we were middle schoolers; I wasn’t excited. There was no reason to lose sleep at night. I just thought of it as a day to go without a bag and come back without a bag. However, I never dreamed that that day would truly be the day my sorrow exploded. I had expected it to come someday, but I never thought it would come so suddenly.