Desire Me If You Can Novel - Chapter 109

The silence returned. Ashley continued, his voice emptied of emotion.

“A friend of his had a new sibling, and the child apparently didn’t like it. He told Grayson about it…….”

<Just get rid of it.>

Grayson whispered to his friend.

<If you don’t like it, you can just make it disappear.>

And he told the friend a method he had read in a book. He said it would be easy since it was just a newborn. You can do it, Grayson whispered. You’ll have your mom and dad all to yourself.

If only that small, annoying thing were gone…….

The sweet whisper easily swayed the child’s mind. The friend took the advice and carried it out. The pillow over the newborn’s face…….

Dane involuntarily squeezed his eyes shut. When he slowly lifted his eyelids again, he met Ashley’s dry gaze.

“Luckily, the child’s parents found them before anything serious happened, and the baby was saved.”

<Grayson, Grayson just told me what to do……..>

“When I asked why he said such a thing to his friend, my son told me this.” He muttered with bitter self-reproach, unable to hide his despair.

“‘I was trying to help, Papa.'”

Dane merely watched him in silence. As if this was the expected reaction, Ashley asked without any change in expression, “Do you understand now why I locked that child in the basement?”

There was not a shred of regret in him.

“There is only one thing that never changes about Grayson: ‘I was trying to help.’ He constantly injures his younger sibling while claiming to be playing with him, and then insists he was only trying to help. You’ve experienced it too, haven’t you? The dangerous things that child does under the pretense of helping others.”

Dane had no rebuttal on that point. He had experienced it firsthand. He clearly remembered the absurd things Grayson had said, not just during the basement incident, but recently when they went to rescue the person attempting suicide.

<He should be allowed to do what he wants.>

Did Grayson think he was helping him even then?

Feeling his head ache, Dane made one last counter-argument.

“Then, seeking professional counseling or—”

“Do you think I haven’t tried?”

Dane was forced to close his mouth again. Ashley Miller was crying out with his whole body that he had done everything he possibly could.

But the result was…….

Ashley finally covered his forehead with one hand. And he pulled out the worst memory.

“I taught him that he must remove his pheromones no matter what, and that child tried to—” Ashley bit his lip in anguish. Then, he let out a choked, harsh whisper between gritted teeth.

“He tried to breed Chase with a dog.”

Dane froze solid. The concept was utterly unthinkable by any standard, yet Grayson had done it. What must the parents who witnessed it have thought? Ashley quickly answered.

“Can you understand that? Should I just coddle and coax this child, saying that since he was born to do such a thing, it couldn’t be helped? Chase has practically cut off the family since then. It wasn’t until recently that we even started exchanging greetings over the phone.”

He could not contain his emotion and squeezed the cigar between his fingers. The red-hot tobacco crumbled in his palm, smoldering with white smoke. He thought he could faintly smell burning flesh. He ground his teeth, glaring at Dane with a fierce look.

“I had no choice but to use physical methods to teach him what was right and wrong. Of course, most of it was wrong. I did my best!”

Ashley’s eyes were bloodshot. After glaring at Dane for a long time, he collected himself and ran a hand through his hair. Suddenly, he looked profoundly weary.

“The fact that my children fully inherited my secondary gender is a punishment for me, too.”

Ashley sighed deeply, sounding exhausted.

“The reason Grayson is still alive and hasn’t killed someone or been killed himself is thanks to my discipline. I only want two things for my children: to not go to jail for murder, and to manage their pheromones properly so their minds don’t break—just like me.”

He warned Dane with the same decisive attitude, utterly devoid of regret.

“Don’t be fooled by that boy. Grayson is extremely skilled at lying. He even tries to deceive me whenever he gets the chance.”

And Ashley Miller added one last thing.

“If you let your guard down, you’ll die too.”

Dane could not speak until then.

“It was truly wonderful to see you today, Dane.” Ko-i, who had come out to the entrance with Grayson, said to Dane in a cheerful voice and hugged him tightly. Ko-i paused wistfully, then stepped back and looked up at Dane, asking earnestly, “Please take good care of Grayson.”

Ko-i then turned to Grayson beside him. After hugging and releasing him as well, Ko-i raised his eyes to his son. Even Dane, watching from the side, could tell the gaze was full of love. But Ashley, standing a step away, merely spared a single glance for Dane and Grayson, nothing more.

“Goodbye, Daddy. Papa.”

Grayson waved as they got into the car. The car started driving away, Ko-i leaning out the open window, vigorously waving his arm, until it finally disappeared from sight.

Watching the car drive away, Dane finally let out the breath he had been holding. Sudden fatigue washed over him. He had heard too much today. Understanding another family’s intimate secrets this thoroughly was something he had never wanted.

How did it come to this?

He felt suddenly gloomy, but it was too late. Dane felt as if he was already neck-deep in a swamp. He turned his head with a bitter feeling, his eyes immediately meeting Grayson’s. It was as if Grayson had been waiting for him to turn and look, and he smiled brightly.

Is that expression real? Dane wondered again. He couldn’t tell where the acting ended and the truth began. Still confused, Dane looked at Grayson.

No, stop it. An alarm bell rang deep in his chest. Don’t step any further in. You’re already in too deep.

He knew that well.

Grayson tilted his head. What are you thinking? his gesture seemed to ask.

“Grayson.”

No.

“Yes.” Grayson answered immediately. Even while hearing the siren screaming in his head, Dane moved his lips.

“There’s one more condition for me to stay in this house.”

Grayson blinked, waiting. Dane continued slowly, “From now on, when you are with me, show the expression that matches exactly what you feel. If you don’t know what expression to make, that’s fine too. You can just look blank. Don’t mechanically manufacture an expression you think you should make, alright?”

Grayson didn’t answer right away. He just looked at Dane with the corners of his mouth turned up. It was clear he didn’t understand what Dane was saying at all. Dane pointed it out immediately.

“Yes, just like that right now.”

Seeing Grayson flinch, he added an explanation.

“If you don’t know, it’s fine not to make any expressions at all. You don’t have to smile.”

The corner of Grayson’s mouth didn’t move easily. Dane stubbornly watched the upward curve, as if fixed, until it slowly, hesitantly descended.

“Good.” Dane finally smiled and said to the boy, who had ended up making an awkward, blank face. “Well done.”

Grayson merely blinked at the tap on his arm. But Dane didn’t linger; he turned and started to walk back into the mansion. Grayson simply watched his retreating back, but then Dane stopped as if a thought had suddenly occurred to him. “Ah.”

“There’s one more thing.” He didn’t wait for Grayson’s reply. “From now on, if you ever feel the need to help someone, ask me first. Don’t act on your own judgment, alright?”

Grayson paused before nodding. Dane gave a single nod back, then turned and walked across the hall. He took the stairs two or three at a time, quickly reaching the bedroom floor. Grayson remained standing in the same spot, watching him. And even after Dane completely disappeared from view, he did not move from that spot.

The cool, gentle night breeze brushed past Grayson’s ear like a caress.