Define The Relationship Novel - Chapter 44

“I’m sorry about today.” The lips that touched his forehead now pressed against his eyelids. Naturally, Karlyle closed his eyes. Listening to Ash’s gradually softening breaths, Karlyle also slowly fell asleep.

Karlyle opened his eyes to the white light piercing through his eyelids. The faint sound of birds chirping could be heard in the distance. The sunlight on his cheek felt warm. The air in the room remained pleasantly cool due to the quietly running air conditioner. A languid, drawn-out sensation enveloped his entire body.

This was the second time he had woken up at such an hour. The first was when he lost consciousness during his rut and woke up alone, and today was the second.

Karlyle, who habitually tried to sit up, felt the arm wrapped around him and quietly stopped. He held his breath and slowly opened his eyes. Ash’s face was right in front of him. They were so close their eyelashes almost touched. Ash’s eyes were closed.

His face, bathed in sunlight, had a different impression than when he was awake. His unsmiling eyes were neatly closed. The slightly upturned corners of his lips gave the impression of a smile, but his closed mouth was surprisingly a straight line. He looked like a different person.

Karlyle, worried that his breathing might wake Ash, held his breath as much as possible and examined Ash’s face. It was truly amazing that even his sleeping face was lovely and handsome. He even felt a sense of wonder.

Karlyle hesitated, then after a very long deliberation, raised his hand. His hesitant fingertips slowly touched Ash’s cheek. It was soft. With very light force, Karlyle touched Ash’s nose. It was also soft. But it was firm.

His finger, which had been caressing the straight bridge of his nose, now moved to his eyes. The faint sleepiness had long since vanished. Even though he was worried he might wake Ash, he couldn’t stop the secret act. He couldn’t believe such a creature existed.

Something kept welling up inside him. Random thoughts churned in his mind. What would it feel like to wake up next to Ash every day?

Sleeping together at Ash’s house, or him sleeping at Karlyle’s house, watching movies like yesterday, cooking, sharing every small detail of their day…

The chain of thoughts led to Ash’s past lovers, whom he had thought about before. Ash must have met many people. Perhaps among them, there was someone he wanted to “die together” with, as he had mentioned while watching the movie. Karlyle didn’t belong anywhere.

He felt angry at the unspecified many whose faces and names he didn’t know. His insides burned and felt suffocated to the point of pain. He was envious. And then Karlyle slowly realized that this strange emotion he was feeling might be defined as jealousy. Karlyle foolishly felt jealous of everyone who knew Ash’s past, Ash’s daily life, and this unguarded side of him.

Unconsciously, a little force went into his fingertips. The eyelids beneath his hand twitched slightly, and then Ash opened his eyes. Karlyle quietly lowered his hand.

“…”

Ash quietly blinked. Ash, with a slight frown due to the pouring light, gazed at Karlyle expressionlessly. This was the first time he had seen such a face.

“…Hello.”

Ash, who had been looking at him expressionlessly for a long time, slowly parted his lips. His hoarse voice sounded incredibly sexy.

“…Are you awake?”

“Hmm…”

Ash frowned slightly, then closed his eyes again and rubbed his forehead against Karlyle’s chest. His lips closed. A small voice echoed from below.

“I’m waking up.”

Having said that, Ash was silent for a few minutes. Ash’s eyelashes touched his neck. He felt a rustling sensation, and then Ash lifted his head.

“Did you sleep well?”

His expressionless face slowly regained its usual look. But it wasn’t the usual wide smile. Ash, with only the corners of his lips slightly upturned, slowly sat up.

The blanket slid down, revealing his firm upper body. Karlyle also sat up, gazing at his contoured back. The faces of Ash he had just seen kept lingering in his mind.

“The bed was comfortable.”

“That’s good.”

Ash brushed back his hair and looked at Karlyle with unsmiling eyes. He tilted his head to the side, and Karlyle saw him let out a low breath.

“Are you okay?”

Ash chuckled. He nodded.

“I’m a little low in the mornings. It’s not that I’m in a bad mood…”

Saying that, Ash looked at Karlyle for a moment. His fingers, which had been rubbing his chin, slowly moved away and brushed back Karlyle’s hair.

“Then, did you sleep well?”

“…Yes.”

Ash spoke as if he didn’t quite understand something.

“Unexpectedly.”

Something was strange. Karlyle asked again.

“What part do you mean?”

“Hmm.”

The fingers that had brushed back his hair moved down and rubbed his ear. At the ticklish sensation, Karlyle unconsciously narrowed his eyes a little.

“Normally…”

Ash still didn’t take his eyes off Karlyle. He looked at Karlyle with understanding eyes and said,

“I can’t sleep well when someone’s next to me.”

Ash, who had been frowning slightly, tilted his head. Karlyle briefly looked at the white blanket to interpret Ash’s words. He had promised himself so many times not to misunderstand, but…

“But Karlyle seems to be an exception.”

The word “exception” captivated Karlyle. Ash had clearly said “exception.” As if fully awake, a beautiful smile finally formed on Ash’s face. Karlyle gazed at him, mesmerized. His unbridled emotions raged, trying to break through the dam Karlyle had painstakingly built.

Ash, leaning against the white wall and smiling with narrowed eyes, leaned down and kissed Karlyle’s cheek.

Misunderstandings disproportionate to one’s station or actions that fail to grasp the other person’s intentions are certainly things to be avoided. But, if Karlyle was Ash’s exception…

“Good morning, Karlyle.”

Karlyle’s lips slightly parted as he watched Ash pull back. His slightly widened eyes gradually, gradually, softened.

Perhaps…

“…Good morning.”

The delusion that Ash might like him too, might actually not be a delusion.

His blood circulated rapidly. Even though he had only heard the word “exception,” his heart melted helplessly, as if he had heard a confession.

His petty jealousy towards Ash’s lovers, and all the unsightly displays he had made in front of him that had upset him, all vanished in an instant.

All that remained was an overflowing emotion for Ash. And the hope that perhaps, that emotion wasn’t just his own.

The emotions and desires he had painstakingly restrained finally broke Karlyle’s boundaries. Like flower petals blooming in soft sunlight, they quietly flowed out and gently blossomed. A faint smile spread whitely across his neat face.

His subtly curved lips and neatly arched eyes, mixed with the breaking white light, were etched before Ash’s eyes.

Ash, who had been smiling, closed his mouth at Karlyle’s appearance. Slowly, the expression faded from Ash’s face.

However, Ash quietly gazed at Karlyle as if mesmerized. Ash, who watched him without even blinking, reached out his hand. His cheek was held.

Ash’s lips touched Karlyle’s, who had unconsciously chuckled softly. Soft and tender lips swallowed Karlyle. Their lips rubbed together.

His body was slowly laid down as Ash pressed himself over him. It happened in an instant. Instead of bewilderment, overwhelming joy surged. Because Ash seemed to want him.

“Do you know?”

He shook his head.

“This is the first time I’ve seen you smile.”

Ash’s gaze on his cheek was different from usual.

“Something this beautiful…”

It was deeper than yesterday, and held something more.

“Are you only showing it to me now?”

Chin, nose, cheek, eyes, and then lips again. Feather-light kisses touched his face. The smile on Karlyle’s face repeatedly broke and reformed. It was ticklish. It felt good. And also embarrassing.

Karlyle slightly closed his eyes and slowly gripped Ash’s shoulder. An unbearable possessiveness surged.

This man, Ash, this person who called him an exception.

“Were you only not showing it to me?”

He wanted to openly express his liking.

“No.”

“Liar.”

Ash chuckled and pulled down the blanket. The hand, clearly with intent, caressing his body, aroused an insane desire in Karlyle.

“Truly… no.”

He wanted to say that this was the first time he had smiled like this. The first time he had been this happy, the first time he had foolishly cried, the first time he had held someone’s hand so much, pressed his lips together, intertwined tongues, and shared body heat, all of it was the first time.

“Since a handsome man is saying it, I’ll believe you.”

Ash’s lips touched his neck. Karlyle lowered his gaze and hugged Ash. Something filled his insides as if it would burst. It was too hard to hold back any longer. He wanted to speak. He had never wanted to say something so much.

If he smiled, it was because…

…he liked Ash very much.

Burying his face in Ash’s firm shoulder, Karlyle whispered. His silently moving lips etched a tender sentence onto Ash’s body. Barely suppressing the transparent words that felt like their timbre would seep in at any moment, Karlyle had a premonition.

He wouldn’t be able to hide this feeling any longer.