Define The Relationship Novel - Chapter 42

In that context, Karlyle finally opened his mouth. Even though he knew it was wiser to leave without saying anything, he did.

“…I dislike it.”

Ash slowly reached out his hand. The hand that brushed back his disheveled hair from his forehead gripped his chin. His head was lifted. Ash looked him straight in the eye and spoke. He looked troubled.

“I didn’t mean it that way.”

Karlyle blinked. Tears slowly dried, and his eyes stung. He suppressed the urge to let out his uncomposed breaths, and looked at Ash.

“So…”

Ash let out a small sigh, then chuckled lowly and shook his head.

“It was just a kind of bed talk.”

Karlyle looked bewildered. Ash, with a face that seemed to say “I thought so,” stroked Karlyle’s forehead. His heart gradually calmed with the tender touch.

“Some people get aroused when you say things like that. Sometimes they get excited without realizing it… I said it to see how you’d react, Karlyle.”

Ash’s fingertips lightly touched his wet eyelashes.

“I didn’t mean it. I hope you’ll believe me.”

Ash quietly looked at Karlyle with an unreadable expression. Something that had been knotted up slowly loosened at the words “I didn’t mean it.” Then, embarrassment washed over him. Ash’s gaze, touching every corner of his face, was hot. Karlyle lowered his gaze for a moment, then looked at Ash’s hand on his face and said,

“…I understand.”

“If you don’t like it, Karlyle, I won’t do it anymore. I promise.”

Ash said. A brief silence fell. A faint sense of relief spread. But the problem was how to react to this. Moreover, the shocking reality that Karlyle had urinated in front of Ash wouldn’t be erased.

“…I’m sorry too.”

At his apology, Ash looked at him puzzled.

“For what?”

“…”

Karlyle bit his lip and turned his body again. He wanted to wash up. Even if they talked later, it seemed better to wash up and leave.

“Tell me, huh?”

Ash followed Karlyle. He usually just turned around and left, but today, Ash’s presence beside his troubled self was both perplexing and, in truth, not unwelcome. His insides tingled. He let out a hollow laugh at his absurd inner feelings.

Karlyle hesitated, then reluctantly opened his mouth again. Making a mistake and avoiding it wasn’t something an adult should do.

“In bed… I made a mess…”

However, Karlyle couldn’t finish the entire sentence. He was truly mortified. Ash blinked as if he hadn’t expected it, then smiled so brightly it hurt his eyes and hugged Karlyle.

Ash hugged him tightly, his body still wet with fluid. Karlyle tried to pull away, feeling like he would get Ash dirty, but Ash didn’t let go. His skin burned.

“Why are you sorry for that?”

“…I’m sorry for dirtying the sheets.”

“It’s not dirty, Karlyle.”

No matter how kind Ash was, this was too obvious a lie. Karlyle couldn’t pretend to believe him.

How could the fluid expelled from his urethra not be dirty? Technically, their sexual act itself was conducted through unhygienic areas, but what just happened…

“That happens when you get excited.”

But Ash said it as if it were the most natural thing. Ash kissed his cheek as if he found it cute, and chuckled softly.

“It’s because you’re so sexy, Karlyle, and you felt it so much.”

Karlyle remained silent. He felt like he had to give an answer that he understood, for now.

“…Is that so?”

“You don’t believe me, do you?”

Ash was quick-witted only at times like this. Karlyle changed the subject.

“…I’m fine now, so if you’ll let me go, I’ll wash up and leave.”

“Leaving?”

Karlyle paused. Although they had started having sex as soon as he arrived at Ash’s house, roughly two hours had passed. Once Ash started sex, he easily went over two hours. The time they had arrived was already well past dinner time, so night was deepening.

“It’s late. Isn’t it time for you to rest?”

Ash quietly looked at him, then shook his head.

“Stay the night, Karlyle.”

He blinked. What he had just heard was something he had never imagined, and Karlyle’s lips parted.

“…I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”

“Where are you going when you’re crying like this? I can’t let you go, it’ll bother me.”

Ash said it very seriously. Ash, with a seemingly grave expression, pressed his lips to Karlyle’s forehead again. His heart began to beat rapidly, but for a different reason than before.

“Are you… telling me to stay the night… right now?”

“If you can, Karlyle, stay the night. I’d like that.”

Saying that, Ash took Karlyle’s hand. Leading Karlyle to the bathtub, Ash turned on the water. Water began to pour into the bathtub, which had a small window faintly letting in the lukewarm night breeze. The large, white, round bathtub slowly filled with water.

“Will you let me make it up to you for making you cry?”

Ash said, rubbing his cheek with an apologetic voice. Karlyle tried to calm his pounding pulse, and after long deliberation, he nodded. In fact, the answer had been there as soon as he heard Ash’s suggestion.

“…Yes.”

At his words, Ash’s eyes curved into a smile.

The bathtub was large enough for two healthy adult men. After seating Karlyle in the warm water, Ash brought wine. Music subtly echoed from beyond the open bathroom door.

Ash, carrying two round wine glasses and a wine bottle, placed them beside the dry bathtub.

“Are you feeling a little better now?”

Ash asked, sitting on the edge of the bathtub and looking down at him. As is typical for someone who has shown embarrassing behavior, Karlyle felt an unbearable shame at Ash’s words expressing pure concern.

Yet, it felt good. After all, Ash was worrying about him. The very act of caring for him was important.

“You don’t need to worry.”

“Hmm, that’s going to be difficult.”

Ash’s eyes crinkled in a smile, and he gently pinched and released Karlyle’s nose. Karlyle held his breath and flinched at the intimate gesture. His skin, reddened by the hot air, felt flushed. It was hot.

“Come to think of it, we haven’t eaten yet.”

He wasn’t that hungry, but Karlyle asked somewhat seriously, concerned for Ash.

“If you’re hungry, you could have someone…”

“Ahaha, no need for that.”

Ash waved his hand. Then he gently reached out, twisted the screw cap off the wine bottle, and quietly poured wine into each of their glasses. Karlyle quietly thought, gazing at the dark red wine smoothly filling the glass.

The storm that had raged inside him had now calmly subsided, filled with different emotions. He was surprised that he could be such an emotionally swayed person. Ash constantly disturbed the surface of the water, which had always been parallel and calm.

“However, it’s a bit late, so is simple pasta okay?”

“You don’t need to overexert yourself.”

“It’s for Karlyle, so it can’t be hard.”

Ash said kindly, even though there was no need to be so tender with such words. Ash, who had filled the glasses, slowly entered the bathtub where Karlyle was. The water rippled. In the transparent water that enveloped them, Ash wrapped his arms around Karlyle’s waist.

“Come up.”

Ash said, gesturing to his thigh with his eyes. Karlyle hesitated. It felt unfamiliar to sit like this when they weren’t having sex. Though it wasn’t much different during sex.

Ash pulled Karlyle’s waist, who was hesitating. White skin intertwined. His buttocks touched Ash’s firm thighs. His heart pounded. As he awkwardly gripped Ash’s shoulders, Ash leaned against the bathtub and pulled Karlyle close.

“Instead, I’ll make you something delicious for breakfast tomorrow.”

Ash touched his eyes. Karlyle’s eyelashes fluttered at Ash’s persistent touching of his eyes. It was hard to find a place to look. Then, suddenly, Karlyle felt something strange and slightly tilted his head.

“Why?”

“…”

With troubled eyes, Karlyle slightly furrowed his brows. Ash’s cock was firmly erect. He had wondered what that hard thing touching him earlier was, and it was Ash’s penis.

“Ah.”

Ash chuckled lowly. A troubled laugh spread softly, and his fingers again caressed Karlyle’s eyes.

“Ignore that.”

Ash said casually. However, Ash’s cock had a presence and size that was hard to ignore. Sitting on it somehow made his body feel hot, and Karlyle couldn’t quite figure out what position to sit in.

“…If you want to, you can.”

“It’s okay. I got hard because you cried beautifully, so just ignore it.”

Ash spoke in a flat, gentlemanly voice, as if talking about the weather. Karlyle briefly doubted what he had heard.

“…Now…?”

“Ah, I don’t mean I liked that you cried, Karlyle.”

Ash pulled Karlyle’s cheek. His lips touched Karlyle’s eyelids. Karlyle slightly closed his eyes and rubbed Ash’s shoulder. The feeling was peculiar. It felt good and also embarrassing.

“But your crying face was too beautiful.”

“Just ignore it.” Ash said that and handed Karlyle a wine glass.

“Thank you.”

So, Karlyle eventually just looked at the glass and thanked him, trying to distract himself. It was a thank you for handing him the wine. But Ash seemed to have interpreted it differently. Ash chuckled playfully and kissed his cheek.

“You accept compliments well, you’re good.”

…He didn’t mean “thank you” for the compliment about his crying face being beautiful.

Karlyle turned his gaze and drank the wine. It was the ice wine Ash had bought. As he tasted the wine, Karlyle searched for another topic, wanting to change the subject somehow. Looking around, Karlyle finally chose a topic.

“…Is the music you’re playing now something you enjoy listening to?”

Ash looked at Karlyle as if he knew everything, then took his hand off his face and picked up his own glass.

“Yes. It’s a Julie London song. My mother used to listen to it often, so I grew to like it too.”

Come to think of it, Ash often mentioned his mother among his family. Had he said he liked duck confit because his mother often made it for him?

“Did you learn to cook from your mother too?”

“You guessed it. I seem to have inherited a lot of my mother’s tastes.”

He felt a little better, bit by bit. It was probably because each time he learned something small yet important about Ash, he felt a sense of closeness.

Like someone caught in a swift current, Karlyle’s emotions and mood were now swayed by Ash. Even knowing this, Karlyle had no confidence to fix this pathetic side of himself.

“She must be a kind person.”

Karlyle, who had no interest in pleasantries beyond work-related compliments, unconsciously said that with genuine sincerity. Ash, who had tilted his head slightly to look up at Karlyle, put down his glass and stroked Karlyle’s back.

“Thank you.”